View Full Version : Star Wars quotes/Crossovers

Bel-Cam Jos
11-01-2001, 06:32 PM
As inspired by fellow poster and moderator El Chuxter in another thread, hows'about we cross over some scenes in SW films with scenes in other movies? Huh? Huh? Okay...

Boushh (In Ubese): "I have come for the bounty on this Wookiee."
Threepio: "The great Jabba the Hutt will gladly pay you the sum of 25,000."
Boushh says something in Ubese again.
Threepio: "One-hundred meellion dollars!"

Anakin: "My name is Anakin and I'm a person!"
Padme': "You. Are. A. Toy!!"

El Chuxter
11-02-2001, 04:54 PM
ESB meets Bill & Ted:

Lando: "But what about Leia and the Wookiee?"
Vader: "Put them in the Iron Maiden."
Lando: "Iron Maiden? Excellent!"
[Lando and Boba Fett play air guitar wildly.]

ANH meets Mystery Men:

Vader: "When last we met, I was but the learner. Now I am the master. We have always been each other's greatest nemesis. . . nemesises. . . nemesii. . ."
Obi-Wan (annoyed): "Nemeses."

El Chuxter
11-02-2001, 05:31 PM
AOTC meets (Space Ghost's) Cartoon Planet

Obi-Wan: "Who all here is evil? Sound off!"
Palpatine: "I'm evil!"
Anakin: "I'm evil!"
Palpatine: "Oh no, you are not!"
Anakin: "I am too!"
Obi-Wan: "I'm sorry, Anakin. I'm going to have to go with Palpatine on this one. You simply don't have the theme music to be evil."
Anakin: "I forget how to be evil. That Jake Lloyd hath lobotomized me!"
Obi-Wan: "I've got it! Let's have Palpatine teach you to be evil!"
Palpatine: "Oh, do I hafta?"
Obi-Wan: "Yes, you hafta!"

11-02-2001, 06:43 PM
ROTJ & Pirates of Penzance (spelling?)
<Luke> "Theres still some good in you, father..."
<Vader> "I'm just a little boy of 8!"

Episode I & Rush Hour
<Jar-Jar> "Yousa all nutsy!"
<Obi-Wan> "Dude man, it's not yousa all, it's y'all!"
<Jar-Jar> "youllsa!
<Obi-Wan> "Y'ALL! Put some stomach into it."
<Jar-Jar> "Y'allsa!"

ANH & Whose line is it anyways?
(Note: Vader is playing his own role of course while Tarkin and Leia only have one line they can use each and Tarkin's line is "Someone needs a hug!" and Leia's line is "I want one of those!")

<Vader> "You are part of the Rebel Alliance and a traitor! Take her away!"
<Tarkin> "Someone needs a hug!"
<Leia> "I want one of those!"

<Vader> "Now you will tell us the location of the hidden Rebel Base."
<Leia> "I want one of those!"
<Tarkin> "Someone needs a hug!"

ESB & I Love Lucy
*Han walks into the Hoth Base control center*
<Han> "Leia, I'm home!"
<Leia> "Whaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh, I wanted to be in the show!"

I'm sure I messed up a couple lines and I think it was two lines they could say in that whose line is it anyways game but wasn't quite sure....

11-03-2001, 02:34 AM

That wasn't original humor, that was their CommTech Chips! ; )

11-03-2001, 04:41 AM
I have no idea what you're talking about. *casually kicks some plastic pieces under the couch* :D

11-03-2001, 06:46 AM
This thread reminds me of something else, but... what? *cough*ripoff!*cough*cough* ;)


11-03-2001, 08:16 AM
ANH & Star Trek IV
<Wedge> "Look at the size of that thing!"
<Luke> "We're looking for a nuclear wessel!"

ANH & Star Trek VII
<Obi-Wan> "I felt a great disturbance in the force...as if millions of voices cried out, and were suddenly silenced..."
<C-3PO> "[sings] Life forms! You pretty little life forms! You precious little life forms! Where are you? do-do-do-do-do-do-do"

ANH & Armageddon
<Wedge> "That's impossible, even for a computer!"
<Luke> "Have you ever heard of evil Kinevil?"
<Wedge> "No I'm afraid I never saw Star Wars."

ANH & Armageddon
<Leia> "Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?"
<Luke> "If anybody's anybody, I'm Han, and you're Chewbacca."
<Leia> "CHEWIE?! Have you ever seen Star Wars?!"

Episode 1 and ANH
<Anakin> "After the storm dies down, I want to show you my podracer."
[a little while afterwards]
<Amidala> "What a piece of junk!"

ESB & Star Trek II
<Vader> "Obi-Wan never told you who your father was did he?"

Bel-Cam Jos
11-03-2001, 08:58 AM
This thread is specific to other movies. The other thread can use other movie lines, but it's not required. It's kinda like when people change one little part of something so they can get their own patent or copyrightt (c) Copyrightt is a copyrighted term of Bel-Cam Jos, Inc. 1977 Ya know? :D :p ;)

ANH and Man With One Red Shoe-
Ben: "I feel something terrible has happened. You should continue your studies."
Luke: "I'm not watchin' TV, I'm, I'm practicin'! I'm practicin'!"


Mandalorian Candidat
11-03-2001, 11:01 AM
The Mummy Returns & the prequels

Anakin: I hate clones

Boba Fett (to OB1): My dad's going to kick your a**.

Jar Jar: This was meesa first bus'n ride.

Mandalorian Candidat
11-03-2001, 11:34 AM
Or how about 'Better Off Dead'...

OB1 (to Luke): I'm sorry your aunt blew up Luke. The doctor said she'll be OK, but she can't eat anything spicy for awhile.

Stormtrooper (looking down at Luke and Han in the garbage compactor): It's a damn shame when people throw away perfectly good white boys like that.

Zev (snowspeeder pilot): Echo One, this is pure snow! It's everywhere! Do you realize what the street value of this planet is?

Leia as Boushh (to Jabba): I want my 50,000 credits!

Jabba (to Leia): You'll make a fine little helper. What's your name?

Jabba: Han, this is a little awkward, but do you mind if I date Leia?

Leia (to Han): I can't stand Jabba. He can't keep his testicles tenticles off me.

Owen: What is that?
Beru: It's bantha bacon.
Owen: I know it's bantha bacon. What did you do to it?!
Beru: You said you didn't like all that grease in your diet so I boiled it.

Vader: Where is your hidden base.
Leia (in french): What?
Vader: Tarkin will be very dissapointed if we aren't at the front of the Death Star when he comes to find your hidden base.

Vader (to Luke): You would be wise not to upset Palpatine.

Luke: Han Solo, you need to obey the proper speed limits. A corellian freighter is not a toy.

Biggs: Luke, I've been at this academy for seven and a half years. I'm no dummy.

Anakin (to Padme): Do you have Boonta on Naboo?

11-03-2001, 11:49 AM
Ah..ok, but that kinda takes some humor out of it. ;)

(Eh, you all knew it was gonna be done sooner or later.)

E1 & Monty Python and the Holy Grail
<Obi-Wan> "What is the problem here?!"
<Darth Maul> "She's a witch!"
<Amidala> "I am not a witch!"
<Obi-Wan> "Do you have any proof?"
<Jar-Jar> "Shesa turnin' mesa into a newt!"
<Obi-Wan> "A newt?!"
<Jar-Jar> "Well...mesa gotten betta."

ROTJ and Monty Python and the Holy Grail
<Vader> "What? Come on and fight!"
<Luke> "But you've got no arms!"
<Vader> "Yes I have!"
<Luke> "No you don't, look."
<Vader> "It's only a flesh wound!"

ESB and Monty Python and the Holy Grail
<Luke> "Look, let me face the peril!"
<Lando> "No, no, it's much too perilous!"

ROTJ and Monty Python and the Holy Grail
[looking out the window]
<Emperor Palpatine> "Some day, all this will be yours."
<Darth Vader> "What, the curtains?"

E1 and Monty Python and the Holy Grail
<Boss Nass> "Wesa bein the Knights whosa sayin ni!"
<Boss Nass> "Wesa are now no longa thesa Knights whosa sayin Ni."
<Jar-Jar> "NI!"
<Other Gungans> "Shh..."
<Boss Nass> "Wesa now bein the Knights whosa sayin... "Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG! Zoom-Boing! Z'nourrwringmm!""


El Chuxter
11-05-2001, 12:14 PM
ESB and The Simpsons: Bart the General episode

Luke: "I'm looking for a great warrior!"
Yoda: "Wars not make one great. No good wars there are, with the following exceptions: the American Revolution, World War II, and, uh, this one."

good shot jansen
11-05-2001, 02:08 PM
Lando: I believe in the republic. The republic has made my fortune. And I built my falcon in the republic fashion. I gave her freedom, but -- I taught her never to dishonor. She found a boyfriend; a corrilian. She went to Kessel with him; she stayed out late. I didn't protest. Two months ago, he took her for a drive, with another boyfriend, a Wookie. They made her drink low grade ethyl. And then they tried to take advantage of her. She resisted. She kept her honor. So they modified her, made her a smuggler, like an animal. When I went to the docking bay, her hyperdrive was a'broken. Her cockpit glass was a'shattered, held together by wire. She couldn't even start right because of the shoddy electrical re-wiring. I wept. Why did I weep? She was the light of my life -- beautiful girl. Now she will never be beautiful again.

[lando breaks down. The sith lord gestures to Needa to give lando a drink]

[lando, taking the drink, sips from the shot glass]

I went to the jedi, like a good republican. These two boys were brought to the sabaac table. The jedi ordered us to play and I lost. I lost! They went free that very day, with my falcon! I stood in the sabaac arena like a fool. And those two bastard, they smiled at me. Then I said to lobot, "for justice, we must go to Darth Vader."

Darth Vader: (sitting behind his desk, petting a baby dewback) Why did you go to the jedi? Why didn't you come to me first?

Lando: What do you want of me? Tell me anything. But do what I beg you to do.

Darth Vader: What is that?
[Lando gets up to whisper his request into Darth Vaders ear]
That I cannot do.

Lando: I'll give you anything you ask.

Darth Vader: We've known each other many years Calrisian, but this is the first time you came to me for counsel, for help. I can't remember the last time that you invited me to your house for a cup of blue milk, even though my ex wife was queen of your family. But let's be frank here: you never wanted my friendship. you were afraid to be in my debt.

Lando: I didn't want to get into trouble.

Darth Vader: I understand. You found paradise in Bespin, had a good trade, made a good living. The jedi protected you; and there was the republic senate. And you didn't need a friend like me. But now you come to me and you say -- "Darth Vader give me justice." -- But you don't ask with respect. You don't offer friendship. You don't even think to call me Sith Lord. Instead, you come into my house on the day my son is to be reunited with me, and you ask me to do murder, for worthless republic credits.

Lando: I ask you for justice.

Darth Vader: That is not justice; your ship is still operative.

Lando: Then they can suffer then, as she suffers.
How much shall I pay you?

Darth Vader: (stands, turning his back toward Lando)
Calrisian... Calrisian... What have I ever done to make you treat me so disrespectfully? Had you come to me in friendship, then this scum that ruined your falcon would be suffering this very day. And that by chance if an honest man such as yourself should make enemies, then they would become my enemies. And then they would fear you.

Lando: Be my friend --
(then, after bowing and the Sith shrugs)
-- Dark Lord of the Sith?

Darth Vader: (after Lando kisses his hand) Good.
Some day, and that day may never come, I'll call upon you to do a service for me. But until that day -- accept this justice as a gift on my sons homecoming day.

Lando: (as he leaves the room) Grazie, Lord Vader.

Darth Vader: Prego.
(then, to Needa, after Lando leaves the room)
Ah, give this to Fett. I want reliable people; people that aren't gonna disintegrate. I mean, we're not murderers, despite of what this gas man says.