View Full Version : Siamese Twin Pleads Guilty to Killing His Brother!

12-03-2002, 03:51 PM
At the Dulles International Airport in Texas, Jack Korper surrendered to authorities when a security detection device went off allerting guards to a 12 inch tire iron that Korper was trying to conceal while boarding a plane to Mexico. The tire iron was embedded through the head of Randolf Korper, Jack's Siamese Twin brother!

Korper, who already had garnered notice as looking a little odd, had been carrying an upside-down flower pot on his shoulder. Only it was not his shoulder, and the muddied earth packed into the pot was actually used to gruesomely offer a make-shift mobile burial plot for Randolf, Jack's attached-since-birth twin brother.

Details about this horrible crime came out at Korper's arraignment when the suspect waived his right to a trial and pleaded guilty of his brother's murder, while in the most usual murder trial, the victim "looked on" as justice was done. The apparent motive for the murder was apparently that Randolf talked too much, and this had been a mentally torturous problem for Jack ever since he was born.

The two brothers, Siamese Twins as reported, were two distinct individual heads, attached to the same body. Doctors had determined it was infeasible to detach them when they were born, and had considered it immoral to sacrafice one brother for the other.

The defendant claimed life had become unbearable: Radolf was always looking on when Jack was voting. The two shared one stomach but one brother loved Mexican food, while the other said the taste of spicy foods always made him ill. Cell phone privacy issues drove both brothers mad to the extreme, especially given that Jack had been a criminal attorney and received many client calls, while Randolf was always in the way and could not allow Jack to provide true client confidentiality. To make matters worse, Randolf was a photographic journalist and Jack was sick of holding the flash for extra feature shots while he had his own professional work to do. Both brothers were of different sexual orientations, and Randolf wanted to pursue being legally allowed to marry his partner, while Jack said his relationships suffered because women he dated did not want to share him with at least 2 other unavoidable partners. This made Jack's marriage prospects look etremely limited and frustrated him to no end, since he said "he felt so extremely alone, yet he could never actually be alone."

The brothers had only two arms between the both of them and had learned from doctors that having additional arms transplanted was not feasible given the state of current medical advances. Additionally, while cloning research has not advanced to the required level to do a transplant of this order, organ donors do not normally specify that their arms or unusual body parts are donatable, and clothing manufacturers would not be able to provide a broad enough variety of clothing appropriate to each of their professions. As it was, the two had difficulty having clothes custom tailored with either two collars, or a forty-eight inch neck size.

Jack Korper testified that he had finally had enough. With his legal knowledge he was aware that he could dodge a muder charge for killing his brother if he too disappeared at the same time that Randolf did. This would basically contain all the damaging evidence. There would no indicators that Jack's brother had died, as long as there was nothing to be found. Meanwhile, Jack said he planned to have "his growth" sawed off by a native witch doctor in a Central-American jungle enclave, where the local medacine man also boasted credentials in exorcisms.

Now he will have to wait for his trial to learn the fate of his brother and pay the penalty for his crime. The flower pot has been replaced with a jar of fermaldahyde that Jack wears with an over-the-shoulder strap so that he can preserve state's evidence. The jar is covered and while previously covered with family pictures at the time of Jack's arrest, now simply has a red label "Exibit A."

We are bound to hear some unique testimony as Texas Superior Court Judge Cindy Lender decides whether to have the victim surgically removed as the defendant had planned, or if a decomposing accelerator will be used, so that Randolf falls off, only a bit ahead of the natural process. The victim's family only hopes that they will have something for a memorial service, and the mother is saving the flower pot for its possible use in the burial.

Patient Zero
12-03-2002, 04:02 PM
Don't blame me! I voted for lethal injection.

12-03-2002, 04:14 PM
:o NEXT!

Patient Zero
12-03-2002, 04:16 PM
No, but Next was my second choice.

12-03-2002, 04:25 PM
Anyone ever see the movie basket case? WOOOOO!!!!

12-03-2002, 04:29 PM
I always wondered why they're called Siamese twins when people from Siam don't look like that. But then my view of Siam is based on the musical 'The King and I' so what do I know...?

Exhaust Port
12-03-2002, 04:35 PM
Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.....

Time to switch to 500 mg.

Patient Zero
12-03-2002, 04:50 PM
Originally posted by Quite-Long Dong
Anyone ever see the movie basket case? WOOOOO!!!!

The best one was when they were all with the 'Family'. I think it was three, but I'm not sure.

12-03-2002, 09:14 PM
Wherever did you find this compelling piece of fiction?

12-03-2002, 11:21 PM
I made it up! :D Like I made up the story about monkeys launching themselves into space - and people reacted to that as if they weren't sure if it was real! Har-har-har! :D

Sometimes I think of really ridiculous and twisted things. Who knows if this is actually possible?

1) There are Siamese Twins born with 2 heads and 1 body.

2) They actually can get married, and some do: twice!

3) They are inviduals with their own minds about things.

4) I'm sure they have to work to earn a living, though I don't know if they can actually work in different occupations.

5) If they have 1 stomach - I'm not sure who gets to decide what to eat.

6) Cell phone usage would be incredibly inconvenient.

7) There are a lot of other strange situations you could probably think of!

So I figured, what the heck? I'll make up a crazy story about it.

What would happen if one of a pair suffered a fatal head injury?

Lowly Bantha Cleaner
12-04-2002, 04:19 PM
I was always told that Siamese twins die within a few hours of the other's death, unless doctors somehow manage to seperate the one that is dead before the other follows suit. :dead:

If my brother and I were Siamese twins, and he died while we were still attached, the first thing I would do is get a prostitute so that I when I go, I would go out in style. :sur:

Patient Zero
12-04-2002, 04:49 PM
Originally posted by Lowly Bantha Cleaner
I was always told that Siamese twins die within a few hours of the other's death, unless doctors somehow manage to seperate the one that is dead before the other follows suit. :dead:

That is because of the blood of one of them coagulating upon death and making it too difficult for the others heart to pump. :dead:

Lowly Bantha Cleaner
12-04-2002, 09:26 PM
Tycho, you would make a great headline writer for "The Star" supermarket tabloid. :D

12-05-2002, 04:52 AM
Originally posted by Lowly Bantha Cleaner
Tycho, you would make a great headline writer for "The Star" supermarket tabloid. :D

I read those sometimes. Really creative people make up that stuff.

When you're at the grocery store and you have to wait in line, check those out.

The only really good one is in black-and-white only, and called "The Weekly World News." All of its stories are fake and really prepostorous, like Batboy, a mutant with bat wings where we have ears, is a regular recurring character. Lately he'd joined the army and is hunting for Osama Bin Laden with his bat radar.

Satan is usually up to something in the newspaper - trying to take over the White House is his typical goal.

The world's fattest this-or-that guest stars, etc. etc.

I'd love a job like that because you can just take something out of every day life - like grocery shopping, and make up a story about a grocery cart that was possessed and ate people...and then someone CGI's a picture of this for you and makes it look real.

Maybe I'll do some more stories here on the site if I think of some good ones, and make some pretty real looking pictures if I have the opportunity.

Free time is hard to come by, and then when you're procrastinating, you don't want to turn that into a new project, too... :rolleyes:

12-08-2002, 05:28 AM
I missed your "Monkeys in Space" scenario, but I am certain that you caught a lot of people off guard. I too like to weave an improbable tale and see how far things can go before someone catches on, and to this day I can't believe that there are people who still fall for it having done so in the past! I should be to the point where nothing I say is taken seriously! I was once with a friend who was driivng me to the apartment where I lived and we passed a nearby fire station. I told him that due to city "Fire Response Zones" if my apartment was on fire, that station could not be the first responder! There was another station ten miles away that would have to respond first due to the zoning of emergency response withn the city. It just so happened that there was a station right on the border of one of the zones. If the blaze got out of hand and became a three alarm or greater fire, then (and only then) could that station be called into the response! He used to get quite incensed when we would pass that fire station after that. What hatred of beurocracy I spawned I do not know, but it would be many years before I admitted that it was pure fantasy (I wasn't going to wait for my relatives to make a posthumous admission upon my demise like the Bigfoot guy).

Anyway, in the vein of classic EC horror comics, your tale was just this side of believeable. It didn't help matters that I used to have an old comic that featured a guy who walked around with a crate on his shoulder all the time and then finally some local toughs decided to see what was so special in the box that he never put it down. They conked him out and cracked open the wooden box to find the decaying reamains of a SECOND HEAD! It seems that this poor chap's brother had died of natural causes some years earlier! The other big give away was that you quite correctly classified the "two-headed" man as a pair of conjoined twins. There is no such thing as a single person with two heads. However, the nature of the mutual reliance on vital systems (mostly the circulitory) has been pointed out by Lowly Bantha Cleaner. The other gaping hole in the tale is the simple fact that such conjoined twins are literally lacking the other half of their bodies. The twin on the left lacks right limbs, the twin on the righ lacks left limbs. As a result such conjoined twins develop an uncanny, lifelong practice of intense cooperation. The act of walking is by necessity a cooperative effort as one twin controls one leg completely and the other twin controls its companion leg. Therefore, upon the demise of one twin, the other could not make good his escape by heading off to a non-existant Texas airport (Dulles is in Washington D.C., kids).
Of coure all of this is elementary since it is difficult to say if anyone was taken in by this tale. If they were, they certainly did not chime in to give thier opinion on the impending trial. Personally I think death's too good for the twin murderer!

12-08-2002, 06:18 AM
Thanks for the response and I'm glad you caught that airport clue. That should have been one of the obvious give-aways that this was not real. No one mentioned it, but I doubt a lot of people thought the thread was anything other than a demented joke.

It didn't last very long. In the future, if I do another one of these, I'll either opt to make it really believeable (with no mistakes or clues) or I'll make it extremely ridiculous with humor on several different layers.

No one picked up on the pun in this one either...
or if a decomposing accelerator will be used, so that Randolf falls off, only a bit ahead of the natural process.

"A head..." nevermind :rolleyes: It was stupid, but it was supposed to be, anyway...

12-10-2002, 10:55 PM
Originally posted by EMPEROR JARGO
I always wondered why they're called Siamese twins when people from Siam don't look like that.

I think it's because the first known (in the Western Hemisphere) documented case of conjoined twins was in, like, the 1800's and it was two brothers joined at the midsection and they were from Siam, which is present day Thailand.

I believe they may have also toured with Barnum and Bailey or something, anyone back me up on this? I swear I've seen old pictures of the two on the History Channel or something.

Darth Cruel
12-11-2002, 12:04 AM
This story will explain why they are called "Siamese Twins". I will ty to get the pic as well.

Chang and Eng, the well publicized "Siamese Twins," were born in Siam in 1811. They were joined at the lower chest by a narrow band of flesh through which their livers were connected. Chang and Eng spent their first seventeen years devoted to their mother and to the business they began to support their family. In 1829, the adventurous brothers accepted the "invitation" of Captain Abel Coffin to travel to America. A small amount of money was given to their mother, and permission to travel was gained from the King of Siam. Upon their arrival in Boston, Chang and Eng began a long career as a public exhibition. Captain Coffin served as their manager, and the brothers were billed as "The Siamese Double Boys."

After several months in America, Chang and Eng left for England. While there, they were exhibited in the most famous venues and met members of the royal family. Chang and Eng were also the subjects of numerous medical examinations to determine the true nature of their connection and the feasibility of surgical separation, which was deemed impossible. During the daily shows, the brothers performed acrobatics and feats of strength, and displayed their connecting band. After enjoying tremendous success in England, Chang and Eng were denied entrance into France because officials there believed that pregnant women who saw the unusual brothers would bear similarly deformed babies. Eventually, Chang and Eng returned to America.

In 1832, at the age of 21, Chang and Eng ended their contract with Abel Coffin. When they were 28, Chang and Eng retired to a small town in North Carolina. Their first business venture, a country store, was unsuccessful, so they bought land and became farmers. During the early 1840s, they became naturalized citizens of the United States, adopted the last name Bunker, and began a search for "a couple of nice wives." In April, 1843, the search was ended when Chang married Adelaide Yates, and Eng married Sarah Anne, her sister. Over the next thirty-one years the brothers fathered a total of twenty-one children.

FIGURE 3. Chang and Eng Bunker with two of their children. Photograph courtesy of the Mütter Museum, Philadelphia.

During the 1850s, and again after the Civil War, Chang and Eng returned to public exhibitions. In 1860, they met the famed showman, P. T. Barnum and worked for a brief time at his museum in New York City to support their growing families. Barnum also sponsored their tour to Europe. While in Europe, the brothers once again investigated the possibility of separation. The danger was still deemed too great, and surgery was refused. As their health declined, the brothers desired to return home, and they came back to North Carolina in the early 1870s.

On January 17, 1874, Eng was awakened in the middle of the night by a strange sensation. Looking towards his brother, Eng quickly realized that Chang had died. Eng called for his son William, who ran through the house shouting "Uncle Chang is dead!" Within hours, Eng was dead, too. Several weeks later, the bodies were brought to Philadelphia by a commission appointed by the College of Physicians of Philadelphia. An autopsy was performed by Drs. Harrison Allen and William H. Pancoast at the Mütter Museum. It was determined that Chang had died of a cerebral clot. It was unclear, however, why Eng had died. Some physicians suggested that he died of fright. Today, it is thought that Eng bled to death, as the blood pooled in his dead brother's body.

Chang and Eng changed the way society viewed conjoined twins and people with profound physical differences. They proved that those who were different can have normal lives: jobs, spouses, and a healthy family. Chang and Eng introduced the term "Siamese Twins" into our language, and introduced the world to a side of nature that was usually hidden away, ignored, or feared. Chang and Eng led the way for numerous other conjoined twins who have since benefited from the acceptance they demanded and received from society at large. For further information on Chang and Eng Bunker, see Wallace and Wallace, 1978.

By the time they died, Chang and Eng were among the most widely known people in the United States. They were the subjects of newspaper articles, books, poetry, satires, lithographs, and plays. They were also a popular subject for masquerade parties. But at that time, these United States were not so united, and in Chang and Eng, Americans saw their own political struggle embodied. Alison Pingree (1996) has documented the tensions surrounding the "Siamese Twins". As "America struggled with its configurations of government (divided states within a united nation) and domesticity (marriage, in particular)," the twins continually raised the question: Are they two or one? The twin's bond was seen as an argument for union and the fusion of the states, while the alternative explanation was that such a connection was "monstrous" and unnatural. Similarly, while the story of the twins' marriages was seen as the triumph of domesticity, these "marriages raised the specters of homosexuality, incest, adultery, and exotic orgies of flesh which profoundly confronted the heterosexual marital norms of Victorian America."

This tension was not merely implicit. It became explicit in the advertisements for the twins. In 1830, Massachusetts Senator Daniel Webster made a stunning speech against the separatists in Congress. He concluded it by urging loyalty to "the sentiment, dear to every true American heart--Liberty and Union, now and forever, one and inseparable!" This phrase was to become so popular that it even got into McGuffy's Reader to be memorized by schoolchildren. The motto was also reprinted on the 1836 handbill accompanying the twins' performances. The handbill was entitled "A Few Particulars concerning Chang-Eng, The United Siamese Brothers." Under the title was an American Eagle with shield, emblazoned with "E pluribus unum." As a legend, if people didn't understand the point being made, was Webster's quotation: "Union and Liberty, one and inseparable, now and forever." The use of Chang and Eng to model American politics was continued into the 1840s, and the material stressed that they were really one person (as in the hyphenated name Chang-Eng). The attempts to surgically separate them and the ultimate decision not to sever the strand were seen as potent political allegories.

The sexual tension was explicitely commented on also. Before their marriages, speculation was rife as to how such unions could be made. They had "each found his other half", and even though unmarried, could never be single men. Pamphlets written about the twins' marriages showed only one home (when they actually lived in two) and compared their domesticity with that of their homeland. But in pointing out that they were now "superior" to the polygamous customs of Siam, they also invited speculation that a piece of that exotic culture was alive and thriving in North Carolina.

Pingree views Chang and Eng as offering "an open canvas upon which America could encode its dominant ideologies of democracy and domesticity. Ironically, though, even as the 'United Siamese Brothers' were presented as idealized literalizations of brotherhood and sameness, and of romantic and marital stability, their contorted, fused bodies also offered, to such ideals, deep challenges indeed."

Hey! It worked...and the first time no less.

12-11-2002, 08:44 AM
A+, Darth Cruel a very thorough, and well-researched report. Makes my explanation look like a pile of puke.

Darth Cruel
12-11-2002, 09:36 AM
Thanks fulit, but I cannot take credit. I found the story on a web search. I should have given the 'site their props...I am a rookie and I apologize.

12-11-2002, 10:09 AM
Yeah, you didn't cite properly, I'm going to have to report your plagiarism to the Board of Academic Integrity. ;)

12-11-2002, 02:49 PM
Really cool research Darth Cruel! That was a fascinating read. Thanks.

So it is hard to tell from the picture, but did the brothers have 1 arm each, or 2, for a total of 4 arms?

Life must not have been easy, and their marriage would had to have been "open."

What great sisters to marry them, though, eh? They must have been some very liberal ladies for that day and age!