View Full Version : showertimes.

03-17-2003, 07:07 PM
So, like, I was wondering, having got some advert for kellogs cornflakes stuck in my head all day, how long do people stay in the shower for? This advert is a couple of CIA agents walking down a hotel hallway and one is running through the daily routine of the third guy who we see going through his daily routine, The first guy says the third guy is regular as clockwork and spends sixty seconds in the shower then breakfast and all that crap about how long it takes the third guy to get ready. But the third guy in his hotel room is still eating cornflakes when guy one and guy two walk in the door . cue visual punchline hahaha.

But this sixty seconds in the shower thing was what i was wanting to discuss. Sixty seconds seems like a helluva short time and i wondered if anyone actually spent that brief a time in the shower. I get in a shower and i'm there at least twenty minutes but mostly an hour. Is this abnormal behaviour? Is sixty second showers the norm? I have to know or that ad will taunt me for the rest of my days.

03-17-2003, 07:23 PM
An hour seems excessive to me, but, you know, I've never actually timed myself. I bet I take a lot less longer now that I don't have long hair and a long beard. I tend to linger if it's an especially cold morning, but usually, I try to get done as fast as possible, because showering to me is one of those annoying human maintenance chores, that take up my valuable time, like sleeping, the biggest time-theif of all. I could be doing so many better things with my time than lying unconscious or scrubbing myself.

03-17-2003, 07:24 PM
I stay in the shower at least 45 minutes lol. A shower or a bubble bath is time for MYSELF to relax without thinking about everything I have to do, or worry about gas prices or war with Iraq.

Its one of the things that bring me pleasure(like collecting, or watching Star Wars, or reading a SW book), so when I get in there I'm going to enjoy it and not worry about time.:p

03-17-2003, 07:27 PM
if i gotta be somewhere, 15-20 min. tops, but if i can take my time, 30-45. i like the feeling and sound of water running over my head. i like the pounding of droplets on my back. very relaxing. i might go take one now...

yeah, there's another question - how often do you shower? generally i like to shower every day, although on some early mornings, i have to skip it to get enough sleep. i will always shower later that day.

sometimes during the summer i shower twice a day...

03-17-2003, 07:43 PM
As a rule, every other day. That might sound like i'm a filthy person but a strip wash usually does the job just as well. I'm not a sweaty person even when exerting myself. I don't have a strong body odour at all. I shower to slough off the dead skin cells with exfoliating sponges. Now here's the paradox. I'm terrified of water. this is one reason also why it's every other day. I can't have water on my face and sometimes showers totally freak me out like I'm suffocating in there. It's a fear of drowning but even standing up it can be quite crazy. I shower with my head as far away from the watewr as is humanly possible but with my body under the water. I can wash my hair in the shower by tilting my head backwards into the jet until the water hits my forehead but no further. Any water past my eyebrows and i freak.
but standing there with water running down my body can be soothing for my back problems, tensions ease away, the heat of the water calms down angry knotted muscles. Aromatic shower gels relax me. Then i get out the shower and rigorously towel myself dry and get all tensed up again :rolleyes: life is a cruel mistress.
The fastest i can get a shower is fifteen minutes. I've tried but i just can't do it any faster. weird. maybe it's something to do with getting my body used to the temperature of the water, standing there with hot water on some skin and bare skin elsewhere getting cold as the steam cools around it. I mean we're in mid march now and I'm in the bathroom this morning getting a shower with a heater on full blast which raised the room temp to something like 70f and i still felt cold in the shower with hot water, almost scalding hot, raining down on me. It took ten minutes to adjust and then i washed. then i stood there for a further half hour. even when i was working at a job that required me to get up and be at work for seven am i still took as long. just weird. I don't know how anyone could take a shower in sixty seconds unless they alreadt washed.

03-17-2003, 08:48 PM
Originally posted by darthvyn

sometimes during the summer i shower twice a day...

Ugh, tell me about it, in the humidity of Arkansas summers, a shower will last you about half an hour after you go outside.

03-17-2003, 08:55 PM
When I first moved out, I was at this apt where I had to pay for the heat, and it was DAMN expensive! During colder months I would keep the thermostat down around 65 or so. When I showered, I would be in there at least 15 min's, and I would have it scalding hot so that I could get out and walk around nekkid:sur: . After awhile I'd get dressed.

I still like scalding hot showers, but 2 things have changed. One, I don't pay for the heat here, so I keep it comfortable. Second, I can only get scalding water here by opening up the valve all the way for heavy water flow. At the first place I was able to use a "rationer" for lack of a better word, so that I could make the hot water last longer.

As for time... 10 minutes is short for me, usually around 15. I need a couple minutes just to really relax. Working 2 jobs helps to build up some tense muscles.

03-17-2003, 08:59 PM
Originally posted by Fulit
Ugh, tell me about it, in the humidity of Arkansas summers, a shower will last you about half an hour after you go outside.

One thing I hate during summer is when you get out of the shower and dry off, but you're still wet b/c your sweating! During those times I usually start hot, and before I wash my hair, which I do last, I cool it down.

03-17-2003, 09:13 PM
15-30 minutes every morning. Don't wash my hair on Saturdays, but shampoo and condition it on Sundays. I clip my fingernails every other Sunday while in the shower as well. I also give myself a "full body wash" on both Saturday and Sunday, and clean "the essentials" on weekdays.

Occasionally, I'll take a warm bath to meditate, but usually I just jump in the hottub outside.

03-17-2003, 09:46 PM
I try to get in every day. Right now Im alone with 2 kids (until tomorrow night anyway) so time for me is limited to say the least. If I don't shower every day, I start feeling nasty, even if I'm not doing anything sweaty. I just like the smell of deoderant just put on, the hair cream my wife gets, the smell of soapy clean skin. Im not usually in more than 10 minutes, any longer than that and I wouldn't be able to get out of bed 20 minutes before work!

Im all about the shower.


James Boba Fettfield
03-17-2003, 09:51 PM
10 minute showers around 4 in the morning everyday. I just do it everyday because I'm always running my hands through my hair because I haven't cut it in awhile, so I got to tame it every few minutes or so.

Emperor Howdy
03-17-2003, 10:31 PM
Personally, I love looooong, soothing milkbaths. I sprinkle in rose petals and a hint of vanilla into the tub, then slooowly peel awa....

**suddenly the door flies open and several masked individuals with aluminum baseball bats begin to beat Howdy mercilessly** :eek:


Average 30 minutes. Pretty much everyday after work, occasionally skipping a day if I'm not too nasty, or freakin' on Battlefield 1942.

"Can't....get.....up.....Must.....play.....one..... .more........round." :p

03-17-2003, 11:41 PM
hehehehhehehehe It depends, usually about 15-20 min regulary, but if i have a pounding headache, i'll take some drugs, and take a like a 45 min shower...the hot water hitting my head for some reason makes my headache dissipate like mad....granted, i look like a prune, but check out my pic, it's somewhat of an improvement. ;)

I don't bathe often, just cause all the baths i've come across are too small for my goofy self, but granted, if i come across one, in a hotel or something, i'll veg out for a bit. Cheers! :D

Old Fossil
03-17-2003, 11:42 PM
I generally take long, hot baths. Very, very relaxing. Sometimes they last up to an hour, if I have a good book with me, or if I'm balancing my checkbook or doing my taxes.:D

03-18-2003, 02:13 AM
I usually spend 15 minutes on average, each shower. I don't have time to relax in there, just get clean. It's as relaxing as it can be in that time, I suppose (or is that when suddenly a half-hour has passed). But I take at least 2 showers a day (can't wake up without one, can't go to sleep without getting cleaned up for bed at night). Meanwhile, if I don't go to the gym as the last thing in my evening, but workout in the morning or some other time, I get my 3rd shower in there, too.

Telling people my personal habits isn't why I came into this thread though.

The real thing I want to know is why don't French people shower? - or at least shower one time per day?

What is up with that?

I really want to know, so people please be respectful and let some French person respond to this - or someone that knows something about French people...

03-18-2003, 02:23 AM
Im French, and we French love the smell of stinky body..

ok, Im kidding.. I'm not French, and I dont stink. The fastest I can get in and out is 5 minutes. I cant take too long on any given day cause I'd use up all the hot water.. I especially enjoy when I get to share the water with my wife.. er.. maybe I shouldnt disclose all this info..

Im all about the shower as well.. unless I turn on the bubble matt..

03-18-2003, 02:26 AM
Ummmmmmmmmmmmm...because their society is different???:rolleyes:

03-18-2003, 07:47 AM
Because, since the plague, Europe has been known as the smelly kid on the block? Seriously, I had this German teacher once who rejected deodorant as I embrace it, and years later some German relatives were staying with a friend and by weeks end the whole house reeked of B.O. I'm serious. And if I didn't know my father-in-law was Cajun, I'd swear he was German; his mother has him convinced that deodorant causes cancer.

03-18-2003, 08:12 AM
Originally posted by Fulit
his mother has him convinced that deodorant causes cancer.

more likely alzheimer's, what with the aluminum content of most deodorants/antiperspirants... i personally use an all-natural deodorant, without any chemicals... it works well, i just have to re-apply later on in the day ;)

as to my cleansing rituals... i love baths AND showers.... i shower every day, usually in the morning (helps to wake me up and makes me feel refreshed), for around 15 mins or so (well, a little longer if i gotta shave my legs or something! heehee)

i like to have baths once or twice a week, in the evenings.... sometimes i get so relaxed in the bath, i stay till the water gets tepid, then fill 'er up again with hot water.... i like my water VERY hot! although i agree that in the summer, the nicest feeling is a hot shower, followed by a cool rinse

lately, though, i've been concerned with the fact that i'm basically bathing in chemicals, so i'm saving up for a bath water filter :)

03-18-2003, 09:05 AM
I never use deodorant anti-perpirant. it clogs up the pores and can cause Lymph node problems and cists and pustules and nasty stuff. Deodorants are okay, one's from pump action bottles are better than spray cans though. Deodorant sticks are just going to cake your pores so they suck too. Off topic again :rolleyes:

I never take a bath because you sit in your own dead skin and muck so that is not good. And actually, completely masking the smell of our bodies is more unnatural than masking them. People who have body odour are more appealing to me than those who abuse fragrances and assault my nasal passages with stinky wiffy perfumes. I'd rather smell a natural body odour than perfumes. Although not a body odour like my mothers ex. His BO was so strong it stunk out the whole house and his feet smelled so cheesey it made you sick. He had no concept of personal hygeine and washed without soap mostly. he took a bath once a week. he sat around at home in the clothes he'd been working in all day - as a delivery driver. Sweaty and dirty and smelly. That is not the kind of body odour I'm talking about. Humans rely on body odour to tell if someone is compatible as a life partner. for procreation purposes people need to be able to smell each others body odour or musk. By masking this smell with perfumes and artificial musks it's no wonder that no-one is stying together anymore, no-one is aware of whether or not they're actually compatible because they cannot smell each other. I only bother with people i can smell. If someone is a fragrance abuser i just won't bother.
chemical attraction is based on human body odour not fragrance choice. I choose to use a faint soapy smelling deodorant and sparingly so that my natural body odour can also mingle. I wouldn't go as far as Porcelina and go all non chemical because that stuff is expensive over here.

03-18-2003, 09:19 AM
Originally posted by Porcelina
more likely alzheimer's, what with the aluminum content of most deodorants/antiperspirants...

Now that's ironic,....his mother has Alzheimer's. She didn't get it from using deodorant, I know that.

03-18-2003, 10:11 AM
With no hair to wash it usually takes me about 5 minutes or less. Three at the minimum. I am usually in a hurry since I only give myself 15 minutes between when I get up and when I have to leave for work. When I take a nice hot bubble bath I am in there for atleast 1/2 hour. And I will take 2 a day in the summer sometimes 3 if it is really humid.]

Originally posted by EJ....

I never take a bath because you sit in your own dead skin and muck so that is not good

The solution is to shower before taking abath so you are already clean. Take a quick shower and then turn the knob to fill up the tub and enjoy the relaxing water. Throw some bath salts or bubbles in there and you are set.

03-18-2003, 10:31 AM
I'm just not comfortable with that whole body-odor attraction stuff.

Yes, I believe in evolution and that humans are animals. Fine by me. That doesn't mean that we haven't tried to separate ourselves from the ways of animals for all our existence though, nor that achieving this would be unappealing.

I am heterosexual, but sweaty girls do not turn me on much at all!

If I was already attracted to a girl, I might forgive her at the gym or after 'late night recreation time,' but it's not appealing for me to be able to smell every girl, and it would be a turn-off to me if I could smell some girl I just met, that strong, witout becoming intimately personal with her.

Smelly men I just cut the conversation with. I might seem very rude, but I just don't want to be there, and if they are offending me one way, my impatience and temperment might offend them in another way, but see ya. Talk to me after a shower if it's important, right now I don't want you to even buy me a beer, dude.

When you smell anything, you take in tiny particles of whatever you are smelling.

People with less than great hygene might very well carry disease. I've never had any serious disease and I don't want any either.

We all have to take our chances in life, but I'd rather take my chances with a girl I'm really interested in, than every common person in a gym, sauna, or packed-in dance club.

My anti-persperiant / deodorant has never caused me ANY skin problems. I use regular scent Dry Idea found at every Wal*Mart.

While I wish I could do a little better in my romantic life, I'm not about to try stinking to achieve this. I don't want to smell myself. Meanwhile for those who do, have you tried farting? Give it a shot. Maybe if smells are the ticket, some great refried beans and whiskey is the ticket to attracting members of the opposite sex!

Come back later, and we'll have a discussion about your success so I can learn if noisy farts work as mating calls, too. :rolleyes:

03-18-2003, 12:26 PM
About 15 minutes, unless I have to shave all my parts and condition my hair, then it's more like 30!

I love the shower, I love to sing in the shower, I find myself mostly singing spongebob tunes....it sounds so good in there, it reverbates off the walls, mixes with the water and it makes ME the new American Idol! :rolleyes:

03-18-2003, 02:04 PM
15 minutes.

03-18-2003, 02:08 PM
Tycho I wasn't saying I liked the sweaty smell. The human odour, natural odour. Not sweaty just real. Perfumed things mask all that, but even though it's supposedly evolution and cultural advancement we still rely on primeval instincts regardless of what we think. Ever wonder why you just don't take to someone? it's probably got something to do with the way they smell. Even when we aren't mating or trying to we still use smell as a way to determine whether or not we like or trust a person. There's nothing we can do about it because it's built into us, the olfactory senses are there for more than just a taste sensation or to smell pretty flowers and fancy food or something. We use our noses the same as dogs do. Only difference is we don't sniffing peoples booty... um, yeah so whether you want to or not you use your nose to root out friends and enemies and segregate the untrustworthy, they smell different because they exude a specific pheramone. When people are lying to you they smell different. Using a deodorant or cologne or whatever with a strong perfume masks all the intricasies of the natural non sweaty human body smell. I prefer to associate with people who don't drown themselves in chemical odours. That was all I was saying. There's been millions of studies and scientific research into this whole phenomenon of human body odour/behaviour relationships. It's like a whole science and the manufacturers of perfumed products are usually the ones who conducted the research. People who are in a state of excitement exude a pheramone that we can smell and that in turn triggers our own sense of excitement. it's literally infectious.
But Tycho is deliberately being obtuse I feel. Fine. But i'll just always think of you as a fragrance abuser. Someone who hides behind chemical odours. untrustworthy. if i can't smell the real you i can't know whether to trust you or not so therefore i choose not to trust and err on the side of caution. To say nothing of how offensive fragrance abuse is. trying to eat and being assaulted by the perfume wafting from another table. Normal natural body odour doesn't travel far but the particles of perfume pervade the air in a room like a swarm of bees, they get everywhere and you breathe all that chemical crap in. it gets in your clothes and in your hair, in your eyes and in your mouth and tastes like crud. And that includes womens make up too which smells awful. I never understood al this beuty stuff where women cleanse and tone their skin and then instantly trowel layers of animal fat greasey crud onto their faces. wads of colored grease smeared all over them and they think it's attractive? I'll take au naturelle thanks. sans make-up and sans strong perfume.

but I digress. Kidhuman, I also don't take a bath because my fear of water stems from being half drowned as a kid in a bath, i was sitting sideways when i was about three and slipped and got jammed under water as i panicked. My legs locked me between the two sides and my dad couldn't get me out. So that gave me a total fear of water. I didn't remember about the bath inceident until a few years back and i'm working on the fear. but that is why i don't take a bath and can't stand water on my face.

03-18-2003, 02:21 PM
Sorry to read that EJ. Just glad your still here to put smiles on our faces:D

03-18-2003, 03:24 PM
I think Emperor Jargo made good points. I also did get kind of silly at the end of my post. However, Jargo also needed to clarify the difference between natural scents and "I need a shower now!" kind of sweaty smells. I didn't understand before.

However, this still doesn't explain French people, those from Belgium, Luxembourg, etc. that have unpleasant scents that linger after they've left a room.

Meanwhile, I'm not a aromatic assault machine, but I do use a man's body spray and a touch of aftershave. Naturally I don't smell at all (when I'm not exercising)... I think. But I'm used to being around "me."

Finally, I have chronic nasal congestion, so I don't have a great sense of smell anyway. I really have to shove a Mouse Droid ...errr flower up my nose, to get any scent of it at all, sometimes. People in my position: Claratin, especially now that it's non-prescription, helps. I need to get stock in that company. 1 per day, absolutely every day, or I get sick! No joke. And it really sucks, believe me!

03-18-2003, 03:51 PM
Californians do seem to suffer nasally.

The european situation is possibly something to do with garlic. And Strong dairy products. those places you mentiona re mostly rural, they haven't embraced the fatless diet that you cosmopolitan Californians have, so with so much richness in their diets they tend to smell differently to anyone used to a low fat diet or fad fashion diet. Similarly to the chinese we westerners smell absolutely awful because we drink milk. Dairy produce in the diet makes us stink. Add in strong garlic and full fat products and a person will have an added je ne se quas (apologies for bad spelling. I personally don't do french.) :happy:

belgians and Luxembergians are not French. Belgians are Belgian and Luxembourgians and Luxembourgians ( I don't know the right way to do that one) Only French people are french French france is solely french france. Those other places are - other places.

Was that trite enough? :D

Patient Zero
03-18-2003, 04:18 PM
Depends, when I am alone or entertaining company?

Seriously though: morning shower 5 minutes & night shower 25 minutes. Clean as a whistle! :D

03-18-2003, 05:58 PM
Ever notice how some people smell like pepperoni when they don't shower? Makes me wanna puke.

03-18-2003, 07:25 PM
I don't use deoderant b/c I never really got into it. I tried it before, in my teenage years (so long ago...). It would actually make me sweat and I felt uncomfortable.

Even thoguh I don't wear it now, as far as I know, I don't stink. Heck, I don't even stink when excercising. Now, stay in sweaty clothes and ferment for awhile...

There's a woman at work that's a fragrance abuser, I think its pachulli oil (sp?) or something similar. To me, it smells like dirt, top soil, very pungeunt. She walks up to ya at 4:30 in the morning "Hey what's up?". You just have to back away and talk to her from a couple of feet away.

03-18-2003, 08:08 PM
I'm getting in the shower right now so I'm going to time myself to see how long it takes. I'll report back, I know that all of SSG waits in suspense for my answer. I will return!

03-18-2003, 08:24 PM
Exactly 7 minutes. I'm the fastest man in the world. And I smell like Active Men's bodywash Sport Scent!

03-18-2003, 09:11 PM
Did you do any sport first? Is it actally effective against those sporty pit smells and athletes training shoe smell? there were other things i could have said there but this is after all a family site apparently. :p

I use Gillette stuff myself. just soapy stuff. Doesn't smell of anything but clean. it's murder to rinse the stuff of your skin though, got a moisturiser in it to combat the drying effect of water. Did you moisturise Fulit, very important apparently or you end up looking like Charlton Heston and George Burns rolled into one. Apparently. So all these adverts keep telling me. "take two bottles into the shower? now you can wash and go with WASH&GO! shower gel and shampoo combined, It cleans it moisturises and turns back the clock on wrinkles. Try new WASH&GO! and see the difference a little TLC for your skin can make. WASH&GO!" :D
"TURBO SPORT ACTIV FOR MEN. It gets you clean - no messing." woo!
"PUBIDRUFF shampoo for men. No need to be embarrassed about a little flaking in sensitive places guys. Those other shower gels and shampoos will leave you dry and sore but PUBIDRUFF will help keep dry skin at bay. And not just right after the shower but throughout your whole day so you don't have to scratch. PUBIDRUFF, because some of us animal testing chemical polluting pharmaceutical companies really do care about you. Pubidruff - you owe it to yourself big guy ;) "

Adverts are wonderful entertainment in themselves. Especially those tailor made for the hard of thinking and gullible.

But i digress again. :rolleyes: tsk tsk....

The 'Xir
03-19-2003, 12:40 AM
Nah, I actually am probably around the forum average about 10-20min myself! Actually I don't know how you guys can spend over 30 minutes in the shower just in the fact that I would think most general hot water heaters/tanks don't hold enough water to last that long!!!

When I was younger, me and a buddy of mine actually had a contest to see who could shower faster! I won clocking in at 2minutes and 10 seconds and he clocked in at 2min 35 secs!

03-19-2003, 01:49 AM
On average I'm about a 10 minute showerer myself. Sometimes longer, sometimes shorter if I'm pressed for time.

This afternoon before getting ready for work, I was online too
long (at SSG of course :D ) so I had to make it a quick one, I'd say about 7 or 8 minutes.

12 minutes. That's my best guess as to average time.

As for frequency, if I'm leaving home that day, it's a given. On a weekend day for which I have no plans, then I usually skip it.
Not worth the effort. :crazed:

03-19-2003, 02:58 AM
kinda dig the designer deodorants.. Curve... gives me that hint of manly cologne that drives all them womens wild!

as for other aromas.. if over done, totally annoying I agree.. but some.... done just right... mmmmmm mmmmmmm...

03-19-2003, 08:44 AM
Originally posted by Tonysmo
kinda dig the designer deodorants.. Curve... gives me that hint of manly cologne that drives all them womens wild!

as for other aromas.. if over done, totally annoying I agree.. but some.... done just right... mmmmmm mmmmmmm...

Ooh, that reminds me.....anyone seen those commercials for Axe body spray, you know, the one with the guy in the elevator who's irresistible to the opposite sex because he has a whiff of Axe on him? 300 points to whoever can tell me what it is they''re singing while the commercial is going on. Me and my wife have been trying to figure it out for months, everytime it comes on, but the lyrics are so garbled it's impossible.

03-19-2003, 10:02 AM
The best deodarant I found is Adidas. It leaves the best smell(for me), not overpowering and no sweat under the pits. I would recomend it.

03-19-2003, 11:10 AM
I take a 5 minute shower every night at around 2:30, right when I get home... I work in a factory, but it ain't too dirty, so cleanup is a breeze... on the weekends, I will take 12 minute showers (or during the week, depends on whether I'm washing my hair, too, which I don't like to do TOO often, bad for the scalp)
I don't worry about every day, but missing one day guarantees the next days activities will include bathing of some description..

Oh, an Tycho, I have some good French and German friends, maybe this explanation will help...... The North American dependence on "body stuff" (all the crazy products one can use to soften, clean etc) was sort of an outgrowth of capitalism around the middle of the last century.... the weird "I don't want to smell anything but chemicals which represent cleanliness" way that most North Americans think is the only way isn't, in fact, the only way.... some societies actually prefer to avoid nutty chemical soups which attempt to conceal the organic nature of our existence, in favour of admitting that we are just animals... we basically smell like what we eat... I eat a pretty strict (but REALLY spicy) diet, and I do sort of smell spicy... of course, if I let it get outta hand no-one's happy... our bodies do make the scent discernable, it must be for a reason, even if it's become vestigial...
Now I'm rambling... sorry!!!

03-19-2003, 02:44 PM
While i was in the bathroom today i remembered that when i was at college I had to do some module on advertising and come up with a couple of products to 'sell' to the class. I invented underarm sanitary towels and glow in the dark toilet roll (for late at night rush jobs) and i'm trying to find the stuff i came up with cuz the underarm thing i actually made a mock up towel - with wings! the ladies will appreciate those things ;) It's not a mucky thing or nasty but at the time i thought it was quite funny. if i find the stuff i'll scan it.

Mabs, i thought if you don't actually shampoo your scalp but rinse it and massage daily it actually helps keep the scalp exfoliated and stimulates the hair folicals into growth. Well that's how I treat my head anyway, both my brothers who don't do likewise have gone bald while I still have all my hair. Interesting that you say otherwise. Who's right and who's wrong. Horses for courses I guess.

03-19-2003, 04:01 PM
Originally posted by kidhuman
Ever notice how some people smell like pepperoni when they don't shower?

maybe it's better being vegetarian... my boyfriend says when i sweat i smell like celery! hehee :p

03-19-2003, 04:02 PM
I have always equated the smell of people who don't shower as smelling like rotten sausage.

03-19-2003, 04:07 PM
Originally posted by Quite-Long Dong
I have always equated the smell of people who don't shower as smelling like rotten sausage.

isn't that what pepperoni is? :D

03-19-2003, 05:45 PM
Well, as threatened promised, here's the stunning artwork i did for the underarm sanitary pads back in college. This was only a day project so it's a little rough and ready but the concept is cool and fresh even now.....

03-19-2003, 05:49 PM
And this was the mock up pad i made. I tried to take into account arm movement but i guess this type of product will just fall off anyway so what the heck. This prototype actually did smell of a deodorising scent and when i rooted it out of the folder from college i got a faint wiff of something clean after all these years. See the product works!!! :D

03-19-2003, 05:52 PM
I also made a simple ad for a new brand of toilet paper as mentioned above and this one is definately for the guys out there comin' in after a few jars of beer. ;)

03-19-2003, 06:11 PM
Originally posted by Quite-Long Dong
I have always equated the smell of people who don't shower as smelling like rotten sausage.
Well, considering that we're all basically made of meat ...

As for me ... a good roll in the dirt lot out behind the local liquor store usually takes care of any body funk. If the pheromones really get goin' I may crack open a bottle of Hi Karate Cologne, which after I've drunk about half ... seems to mask most of my "natural" fragrances (or at least I can't smell them anymore.)

Seriously, 10 minutes + Irish Spring ('cause she likes it too) and then whatever mild/inexpensive deodorant I've got laying around.

I worked a perfume/cologne counter back in college ... so I don't use or believe anyone should use heavy perfumes or colognes. Frankly they make me sick and to this day I have a damaged sense of smell thanks to Calvin Klein.

Dr Zoltar
03-19-2003, 06:12 PM
Alright, I'll add in my $.02. My showers average 10 - 15 minutes. If I have to wash my hair (which is long) it's another 5 minutes. I wash it every 3 days to keep it from getting to dry and brittle. And I am one of those that use an exfoliating sponge with body wash instead of soap. I even use Tea Tree scrub on my face (insert The Body Shop advert here).

Deodorant of choice is Right Guard Antiperspirant. Smells decent and really does stop perspiration.

Now how often and how long does it take everyone to shave? I shave my face once every 3 days. I have a goatee and some strange looking pointy side burns so it takes me 20 minutes to shape everything just right. Boy, I'm really coming off sounding anal retentive aren't I?

03-19-2003, 06:30 PM
You don't want to stop the sweat glands from working by using anti-perspirant, that's what i was saying about clogged pores will turn nasty and can lead to lymph node problems and cists. anyway, shaving is something that i avoid. Maybe once a fortnight. a weeks growth for me is most mens daily growth. It takes me fifteen minutes to shave and much cursing to get the bottom of my sideburns the sameon both sides, mostly due to one of my ears being half an inch higher on my head than the other. so getting an height right is hell. same height so one sidey looks longer or adjust the height and look lopsided? its murder i tell ya. Gilette cool wave products. Sensor razor. Usually blunt. No aftershave or balm. Just a rough wet shave and a rough towel dry. Virtually never cut myself. never get stubble burn or rash.

03-19-2003, 07:45 PM
Please refrain from using sexually-oriented language. Thank you.


You know what else causes body odor? Armpit hair, the sweat and bacteria get all caught up in there - I'm told Italian men shave their armpits to avoid this problem.

I no longer use antiperspirant since I learned of aluminum's contribution to alzheimer's. I try to avoid food cooked with aluminum cookware too, though too many restaurants out there use aluminum grills to completely avoid.

In general, I take 20 minute showers, though it can get as short as 4 minutes and as long as an hour - though most of that is relaxing rather than cleaning.

03-19-2003, 08:01 PM
Jargo those pads are too funny

03-19-2003, 08:40 PM
I bet if you boxed them up and put them in stores they'd sell alright. people will buy any old crud if you tell them they need it. Just put on a white doctors coat and start using made up chemical names like chlorodioxy-hydroline and hystadrenotan #418 and people go ape clawing to get it. Like shampoo ads for women that scream about having new technology made with Trillian or something. Trillian? when did a character from The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy become a chemical? It's all nonsense. Soap is soap is soap. Conditioners? it's just a grease residue coating your hair strands. Nothing special just something cruddy like sheeps wool grease tarted up with a new name like phenodyatyline mizoate #35 or whatever. They should pay me to make up chemical names, I'll do it for half what the suits and ad men will. Here ya go Benzotarnos-metasol they can have that one for free.

I'm not comfortable around a guy who shaves his body hair off. I find it distasteful. unnerving. or at least shall we say that i find it disturbing if a guy shaves his armpits and - southerly regions. ( was that diplomatic enough?) It's not right, it's just not right for a guy to shave those bits. Ugh! :eek: :crazed:

03-19-2003, 09:24 PM
Originally posted by EMPEROR JARGO
I'm not comfortable around a guy who shaves his body hair off. I find it distasteful. unnerving. or at least shall we say that i find it disturbing if a guy shaves his armpits and - southerly regions. ( was that diplomatic enough?) It's not right, it's just not right for a guy to shave those bits. Ugh! :eek: :crazed:

I will agree with you on that one. It is unnatural to do that for a man. WHile watching The Wall I get icky chills when he is shaving off all his hair. Just nasty!!!!:eek:

03-19-2003, 11:34 PM
Originally posted by EMPEROR JARGO
I Just put on a white doctors coat and start using made up chemical names like chlorodioxy-hydroline and hystadrenotan #418 and people go ape clawing to get it. s and ad men will.

totally true.... i recently learned that in the u.s., anyone with a phd can call themselves "doctor"... like the couple who wrote the carbohydrate addict's diet book are not medical doctors at all, one's got a phd in psychology and the other something else, and they wrote a book, call themselves dr. whatevers and wear white lab coats and people buy the book... when they went on oprah, they came out in white lab coats and stethoscopes!! argh... makes me sick... however, i was pleased to find out that in ontario, if not canada, you need to be a medical doctor to use the surtitle of "dr."

p.s.--most of that book is complete baloney, don't buy it :)

03-20-2003, 01:00 AM
Well, to catch up on things, I've browsed what girls say in singles ads (describing how important looks are to them when choosing a guy). Girls 18-25 don't like guys with lots of body hair and would actually prefer guys who shaved their body hair. I've heard that many, many times, and had the wonderful opportunity of getting the insight on that from some of San Diego State's finest cheerleaders. Now maybe it's a California-girl preference, but when one lives in California....

So in the end run, Maxim Magazine came to the same conclusion about shaving (chest or back hair, or hairy arms and hands - let's not talk about the rest), but Maxim agrees, it only matters for what the gals think. Make yourself attractive to who you want and are attracted to.

Know what I just can't stand though? Bad breath. I always carry Trident Original (blue) flavor gum with me. It works and can't harm your teeth. Sure wish others would follow that example! I've backed away from not just men, but attractive ladies too, that had bad breath. There's been a couple of circumstances with girls where I wish I didn't, but what's done is done.

I really agree with what Mabudon posted: that it is ingrained in American culture that we must smell like the profits of our bath and beauty industry, but hey, there's about 20 years worth of habit-taste forming going on here, so again, what's done is done. I should date a girl who works for Tri-dent. :rolleyes:

And while I'm grumbling, I'm also turned off by girls with tattoos and body-piercings (or anything but earrings, though some girls can wear a nosering and not have it look like a zit). But ladies, when I say "turned off by something... it REALLY means turned off".

It's ironic how one way (scents / smells) I'm totally invested in cosmetic products, and in another way, I'm totally into natural bodies only.

03-20-2003, 01:21 PM
My showers are generally around 15 minutes. The only time I shaved (most of) my body hair, was when I was entered into a body building contest. Most of the girls I've dated prefered that I keep the body hair. I'm single now, and I don't really care if the ladies in some magazine want a clean shaven man, I'm not doinf that again.

That reminds me, I still have to take a shower yet today.

03-20-2003, 04:38 PM
today was one of those "can't get out of bed, forget the shower" days... i don't like it, but it's what happens sometims...

Darth Cruel
03-20-2003, 04:57 PM
Half an hour, minimum. Longer if it is cold and i am afraid to get out and face it. Even longer if I am torturing my family with my singing.

Unless the hot water runs out.

Patient Zero
03-20-2003, 04:59 PM
Originally posted by EMPEROR JARGO
I'm not comfortable around a guy who shaves his body hair off. I find it distasteful. unnerving. or at least shall we say that i find it disturbing if a guy shaves his armpits and - southerly regions. ( was that diplomatic enough?) It's not right, it's just not right for a guy to shave those bits. Ugh! :eek: :crazed:

Are you saying that it is natural for a woman then?

I don't think that it is natural to use forks. Begone with ye damnitable fork! :Pirate:

03-20-2003, 05:31 PM
No, i don't think it's right for women to do so either. I have absolutely no problem with female body hair. Unless it's a stache and then i think some hormone therapy is called for but as far as pubic hair goes what is all this shaving off business?

having been to several restaurants and watched as grown men ate from their knives and never even looked twice at a fork i'd say you might see that wish come true. In fact when do people eat with forks these days all this junk food is fingers only or just open you head and throw it down your throat direct to stomacj without even bothering to taste or chew. Bring on the astronaut 'food' pills and be done with all of it. Just throw a few of them sustenence pills down your gullet and have all the daily required vitamins and minerals and proteins in one go without any of that messy food stuff.

digressing again. Do people still actually cook their own food? Like proper meals and stuff. veggies and meat and pudd'n pie? All I ever see in people's grocery carts is microwave meals and oven ready pre-packed meals and junk stuff. No preperation needed. I actually know someone who thought potatoes just came ready washed and peeled in bags in the freezer department. he didn't know they grew in the ground or had skins when they came out the ground. he'd never actually in his whole thirty years on this planet seen or experienced a real potato au naturelle. Shocking.

03-21-2003, 01:15 AM
From "Showered and Shaved" to the "Darkmaster cooking discussion". ;D I personally never had much time to cook, so I started eating out, but as healthy as I could. Now I have my son living with me, and can no longer afford to eat out, nor work as much as I have in the past. We have started shopping, but we buy simple and easy to cook items, and yes, I still use a fork, even while I eat pizza.

03-21-2003, 01:27 AM
I bathed once.....I didn't like it......

03-21-2003, 01:35 AM
Originally posted by EMPEROR JARGO
Do people still actually cook their own food?
You should cook most of it. Some things like pork and chicken will make you sick if you eat it raw.

03-21-2003, 06:16 AM
:D hell, ranting lunatic here. Actually i think it was QLD or 12"Lando that dubbed me Emperor Jargo, Lord of the insane. How true, how true....

Raw food sucks. Fish and veggies and stuff. Never could understand this al dente thing about half cooked veggies. I know it keeps the flavors in and seals in the goodness by not cooking it all out but bleurgh! I likes me veggies soft and palletable (sp?) I just find convenience food to be anything but a convenience. There's so much packaging with it all and no content inside. Gotta be all real food for me, freshly slaughtered or pulled from the ground, home cooked. Sit at a table so that food digests properly and use a knife and fork in the right way. It's something i'll actually one day go ballistic over and smite someone for is using a fork upside down like a shovel and not bothering to use a knife. Or eating with a knife and leaving the fork in the drawer. Leaving bits of toast on the butter, butter in the jelly, drinking straight from the milk carton or the juice carton. Unsavory behaviour.... grrrr.

Ever see 'The odd couple'? Walter Mathau's character is so me - no actually I'm a mix of both of those characters, a bit of Jack lemmon too. Only without the weird nasal thing going on. :D

Lord Malakite
03-21-2003, 11:40 AM
Originally posted by EMPEROR JARGO
Raw food sucks. Fish and veggies and stuff. Never could understand this al dente thing about half cooked veggies. I know it keeps the flavors in and seals in the goodness by not cooking it all out but bleurgh! I likes me veggies soft and palletable (sp?)

I don't really care for raw or al dente vegetables either. I prefer them to be soft enough that they can be mushed up into a fine paste if need be. Now thats good eating.

03-22-2003, 12:41 AM
Originally posted by EMPEROR JARGO
Never could understand this al dente thing about half cooked veggies. I know it keeps the flavors in and seals in the goodness by not cooking it all out but bleurgh! Actually, there is a major misconception about the quality of nutrients we gain from raw vegetables. While it is true that they have far more nutritional content raw, this content is largely undigestable to the human stomach and thus remains unusable. Adequate cooking - while definitely lowering the nutritional content some - actually unlocks the bonds that keep this content from being absorbed, thus cooking your vegetables is actually vital for humans to gain food value from them.

Of course, British cuisine has been known to vastly overcook the vegetables, thus rendering them not only nutrient-free but also often mixing compounds that were not meant to meet thus causing foul odors and even the possibility of undesirable substances and free-radicals in your system.

03-22-2003, 07:19 AM
You keep your free radicals to yourself mister! I'll have none of that talk in my thread thank you very much. :mad: ;)

Yes it's true that in the past cooks did tend to overcook veggies to a massacred pulp mush like babyfood but then we got the eighties and Nouvelle cuisine and all the TV cooks were telling us al dente was the way to do it and suddenly it's baby veggies the size of an atom and all crunchy like dirt. British cuisine isn't what it used to be although with a population consisting of an ever growing elderly baseline there are still those who stink the place out with brussels sprout mush and cabbage soup. British cuisine is actually ending up a mix of chinese and asian with a sort of muddling in of traditional stodge based stuff. Stir fry being one of the most used methods of cooking here.

How did I get here? Anyone use a power shower? I hear they're excellent. Anyone have a wet room? I'd love a wet room rather than a shower over a bath. hate feeling like i'll slip on the curved side and break my neck falling out the bath and be found naked wet and dead wrapped in the torn shower curtain or something, most undignified way to go that would be. A wet room would be so cool. If not for me then also for dragging the dog into the shower in the winter when he comes home muddy. Just drag him in and hose him down. I once designed a house for myself with a wet room that was built in the style of a locker room just because i once saw one on TV done in red tiles that looked really cool. Red mini tiles and a black duckboard floor and a black ceiling with concealed lighting and one wall of mirror. It was about twenty feet long and absolutely impractical for domestic use but it looked good in my mind. I hate the fact that most houses I've been in have pokey little bathrooms you don't have enough room to swing a hamster in. I like a big room so you don't feel claustrophobic.

03-22-2003, 08:29 AM
Ah, the power shower!

Well, for me, it's physical training everyday (M-F) from 0530-0630 which means I'm at the gym and ready to go before 0530!

My day pretty much goes:

0430-Wake-up and shave, wash my face and brush my teeth. Change into Army PT's (Physical Fitness Training Uniform).

0500-Hit the road, drive to the Gym where we (my fellow soldiers and I) meet for PT (Physical Training).

0530-0630-Conduct PT, consisting of push-ups, sit-ups and running. Usually variations of these exercises, with an average of 3 miles per day, road work (running).

0630-Drive home

I have to be back at work by 0800 so my showers usually end up being 10-15 minutes.

Needless to say I must shower on a daily basis. I also train on my own during the weekends so I shower everyday. Somewtimes I feel beat at the end of the day and I will take a power shower (3-5 min.) or I will take a soothing relaxing shower (20 min.). I also have little to no hair and I shave everyday. So, I'm pretty low maintenance.;)

Exhaust Port
03-22-2003, 08:58 AM
Ususally about 15 minutes in the shower for me. In the winter when the apartment is cold they'll run a lot longer, around 30 minutes. I don't pay for water so I'm a fan of marathon once a week or so. Boy, I'm not looking to have a real place where I have to pay for water.

03-22-2003, 09:14 PM
Normally,I take a shower every day about 15-20 minutes long.Sometimes 30 minutes if I'm just too lazy to move the right and get out:DLiving in the South,however,in the summer its wise to shower twice a day,or just run around the sprinker outside.:crazed: