View Full Version : Star Wars Jokes

plo koon 200
02-13-2004, 04:50 PM
I just thought it would ne nice if we could get a laugh every now and then. So I decided to create a thread where we create our jokes, good and bad.

Here is mine.
Q: Why couldn't the Collector get to the toy store?
A: His Toy-Yoda broke.

02-13-2004, 06:18 PM
Oh man, thats so stupid Iam laughing.

The 'Xir
02-13-2004, 07:18 PM
Just in case George wants to really sell out his franchise, we could always end up with things like this:

What d'you got there?

It's a lightsabre!

A Lightsabre!...BRILLIANT!
What do ya do with it!

Well ya know that guy in the big black mask and cape who is always threatening to destroy the universe?


Well, we can kill him with this and rescue the princess!

Kill the guy with the big black mask and cape, and rescue the princess?.... BRILIANT!


What else you working on?

You know how the guy down at the Cantina is always charging us too much for our ( Sir Alec)Guinness stout?


Well, I'm harnessing a mystical power known as The Force, to make him give it to us for free!

Harness a mystical power known as The Force, to get our Guinness draft beer for free?... BRILLIANT!


:crazed: ok I'm bored! :D

02-13-2004, 08:14 PM
Lucasfilm Character Creation Team - Day #1138

George: "Ok team, we need to come up with a named for Boba's father, any ideas?"
LFL Emp. 1: "Bob?"
George: "Bob Fett? It's so crazy it just might work.."
LFL Emp. 2: "How about Bubo?"
George: "Copyright Bob anyways, but we need something more..."
LFL Emp 3: "Can we get a break, oh wise one?"
George: "Alright fine, everybody take five, but I want better suggestions afterwards!"
LFL Emp 2: "Anybody wanna play ball? Hey Jan, go Fettch!"
George: "That's it!!!"

Bel-Cam Jos
02-14-2004, 08:56 AM
There used to be a thread just like this one in the Old Forums, and it was quite a chuckle. A painful, pun-filled chuckle, that is...

Knock, knock.
(Who's there?)
Stinky Gungan.
(Gungan who?)
Stinky gunk in sink so clean it out.

What kind of tool is the favorite of angry Wookiees who lose?
A rip-your-arm-out-of-your-socket wrench.

How do you keep a Corellian in suspense?
Encase him in carbonite.

02-14-2004, 09:02 AM
Booooo! Bring on the next act!

02-14-2004, 09:40 AM
GL had the whole SW saga written down in 1972....

No, huh???

okay..... Han Solo :D

02-14-2004, 11:39 AM
Hers a good one..............

Hayden's acting and Jake Lloyd's too......Yippeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darth Kirk
02-14-2004, 09:32 PM
C-3PO : Hey Artoo, where'd you put my cologne?
R2: Peeepoo paa puu
C-3PO : What? Don't you dare talk about how bad I smell, you overweight rolling wastebasket!
R2: pu paaa peee pe puuuu!
C-3PO : Well, I have never been soo insulted! What do you mean that there needs to be a one year moratorium after I leave any restroom.. I will have you know that I have been programmed to release a floral deodorizer right before leaving any lavatory facility.. You lousy good for nothing ball and chain!
R2: po peee paaaa pwoki
C-3PO :No, I shant accept your apology..
R2: pee pa puik pe piiiiii
C-3PO : NO!!! and you shall be sleepin' by yourself tonight!!!!!

Excerpt from Star Wars Episode III :crazed:

Bel-Cam Jos
02-15-2004, 09:36 AM
How many battle droids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to turn it, and one to speak the lame dialogue.

* * * * * * * * * *
Why did Lando cross the road?

To get to the other side.

Why did Lando notice Han cross the road a second time?

Because he's a smily, double-crossing, no-good swindler.

* * * * * * * * * *
What's the difference between Mon Mothma and the Dark Side of the Force?

She trails off in despair, while the Dark Side is a trail of despair.

* * * * * * * * * *

And they just keep getting bitter, uh, I mean better. :p

Darkness Shroud
02-15-2004, 10:18 AM
Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are dueling on Bespin.
Vader tells Luke " i know what you have for christmas!"
"No! No you dont!" luke rebukes.
"I do too!" Vader says as he slams his lightsabre into Lukes.
"Ok how do you know what i have for christmas?" asks luke
" I felt your presents!" Vader declares!
Get it presents/presence?:D lol :crazed: :confused:

Bel-Cam Jos
02-21-2004, 08:32 AM
Why doesn't Luke like to get ties as gifts?

Because, like they say, a tie is like kissing your sister.

= = = = = = = = = = =

Why do stormtroopers keep returning to Tatooine?

Everyone knows they're "dewback" at any time.

= = = = = = = = = = =

What is a Jedi Counsel Member's favorite drink?

Qui-Gon Gin.

= = = = = = = = = = =

How many clone troopers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

As many as you want, if you've got the money and time to wait!

02-21-2004, 08:59 AM
What do you get a Wookie for Christmas when he already owns a comb?

No really, I wanna know too.

02-21-2004, 11:37 AM
Why didn't the silly looking, long armed amphibian take the spokesperson job for Maytag??

Cuz he was an AMANA-man.

Bel-Cam Jos
02-28-2004, 08:34 AM
How can you tell when a Hutt is hungry?

When it's either daytime or nighttime.

= = = = = = = = = = =

Why don't blasters ever get hired to work for accounting firms?

Because they're clumsy and random.

= = = = = = = = = = =

How do Rebel tauntaun trainers know their animals are still alive?

When they see them inhale (in hell).

= = = = = = = = = = =

02-29-2004, 07:24 PM
Oh, that last one deserves a BSLOS if ever I've seen something that deserved such a thing!!! :p

02-29-2004, 07:34 PM
Second that JT.............

Whats a cats favortie clothing item?

Bib For-tuna