View Full Version : The Pirate Captain.

04-08-2005, 11:16 PM
A young man who styles himself "The Pirate Captain" is running for student body president at my beloved alma mater. It is creating quite an amusement here in town, and has actually caught on to some national attention. In today's paper, he was featured on the front page right next to the pope. He has promised to rid the campus of "scurvy dogs". Check out the funny links:




I dig the Pirate Captain and I hope he wins!

04-09-2005, 03:45 PM
That's pretty cool. I hope the land-lubbers choose the Cap'n over that other candidate, Lock Whiteside. What the hell kind of name is that? (Isn't that the name of the Judge in Futurama? Or maybe it's Judge Whitey - "My chauffeur tells me a bank is a place where poor people put their money that's not properly invested"). I bet Lockside can trace his ancestry back to when the Anglos met the Saxons over tea and scones.

If the Captain wins his VP would be the First Mate and the Secretary would be Quartermaster. But if the student body later regrets electing the scalawag, do they just give him the ole black spot?

04-28-2005, 09:45 AM
The Pirate Captain won! and now, he is inspiring a playoff system in the BCS!


04-29-2005, 09:21 AM
i live in raleigh now, and i'd heard about this... funny stuff.

yeah, okay, the pirate captain is obviously the guy's title, but lock whiteside is TOTALLY a fake name!!! max POWER, it's the name that sounds good in your ear... max POWER, it's the name that you fear... but you mustn't FEAAAARRR!

i can't believe they voted for a pirate. ECU must be staging a coup.

only a ninja could have beaten the pirate in this election. alas, there was no ninja enrolled at the time...

04-29-2005, 02:24 PM
only a ninja could have beaten the pirate in this election. alas, there was no ninja enrolled at the time...

Maybe not, but I'm sure there has to be at least someone on campus that knows illegal ninja moves from the government.

05-01-2005, 10:55 PM
i can't fit my numbchucks in my locker!

i think the article about how he won is great. this is the best summation of the whole thing:

The Pirate Captain understood his constituency. He understood that college students love anarchy, radical grassroots ideas and hilarious pranks. Didn't you see Animal House? By launching a campaign in which he reinvented himself as a character, the Pirate Captain put a grin on people's faces and appealed to the popular notion that student government is a farce, anyway, so why not give the voters a chance to prove it?