View Full Version : Habro's New Motto is...

01-28-2002, 09:52 PM
A giant company like Hasbro should have a motto...here are some they should consider:

1. Hasbro - We put the FU in FUN!
2. Hasbro - We put the K in Quality!
3. 1/2 the figure, 2x the price!
4. Helping All Scalpers Because we Rarely Overstock!
5. All Demand, No Supply!
6. Ship 1 case of the latest wave, wait 3 months and ship another.
7. King of the Resculpts!
8. If we don't get it right the first time we'll just keep trying.
9. Destroying Major Brands for over a Decade!
10. Not the company who made those red Episode I cards.
11. Micro Machines? Never heard of em.
12. Buying out the competition and running them into the ground for over 2 decades!

01-28-2002, 09:59 PM
- Hasbro - We're Working To Keep Your Money*
- Hasbro - Because getting it right is impossible for us
- Hasbro - Where qaulity is job eighteen
- Hasbro - Toys made by underpaid Chinese labor are cheaper!
- Hasbro - Killing popular toy lines for over 20 years
- Hasbro - Playing with our toys will soon be impossible

* - borrowed from "Kentucky Fried Movie"

01-28-2002, 11:02 PM
At Hasbro we don't make a lot of the toy lines you collect -- We make a lot of the toy lines you collect - deader.

Emperor Howdy
01-28-2002, 11:10 PM
Hasbro: Making the Accounting Dept. Smile!

01-29-2002, 01:14 AM
Hasbro - "We want your money,just give it too us"

01-29-2002, 01:18 AM
Hasbro - We love to see your wallets open
Hasbro - 3 Billion dissapointed and still cooking!
Hasbro - It keeps lacking, and lacking and lacking
Hasbro - Got a broken toy? Return it without a refund!
Hasbro - All our figures are like frozen solid statues, we put the artic in articulation!
Hasbro - We don't blame Canada - We just don't serve them!
Hasbro - We support McDonalds!
Hasbro - Oh, you care?
Hasbro - Star Wars is NOT forever!
Hasbro - Attack of the Resculpted Clones

01-29-2002, 01:25 AM
Hasbro - Screwing collectors over since 1978 :)

01-29-2002, 06:50 AM
Hasbro - Our company mascot inspires our intelligence!

Rollo Tomassi
01-29-2002, 08:00 AM
Hasbr:greedy: : We took the Action out of Action Figure!:D

Hasbr:greedy: : Coming up with more dead end toylines than any other toy company!:D

Hasbr:greedy: : Our toys suck...so you don't have to!:D (uhh...:confused: )

Hasbr:greedy: : IS listening...but we don't understand that silly gibberish you speak in. What is that, English? never heard of it...:D

Hasbr:greedy: : Quit yer b!tchin' and fork over the cash you whiny li'l S.O.B.'s:mad: ..I..I mean...:D

Bel-Cam Jos
01-29-2002, 11:18 AM
Hasbro: Hasbeen, What's the Difference?
Hasbro: Our Stock Used to Be Good
Hasbro: Proving That Market Research is Passe'
Hasbro: Last Updated June 6, 1999
Hasbro: Two Words: K-P30 (??)
Hasbro: Having Another Silly Brainstorm - Resculpt Obi-Wan!
Hasbro: Hasbooooooo!!!! :mad:
Hasbro: Spells "B.O. Rash"

Mandalorian Candidat
01-29-2002, 11:19 AM
HASBRO - Screwing up figures so you don't have to.
HASBRO - We love to see you smile while you bend over and take it.
HASBRO - Making one-pose wonders since 1996.
HASBRO - You're always welcome to shut up and buy 'Star Force' instead.
HASBRO - We've never met a resculpt we didn't like.
HASBRO - Rick McCallum, we salute you!

01-29-2002, 01:10 PM
HASBRO: Packing in ten tons of sh*** delight! :Pirate:
HASBRO: Flushed with crappy ideas and sh***y gimmicks :Pirate:
HASBRO: Working to fleece you every waking hour god sends! :Pirate:
HASBRO: *yawn*.........
HASBRO: Now run by Lemurs :Pirate:
HASBRO: There are three fun ways to say potato... "1...... um, 2....." :Pirate:
HASBRO: "We make what? We do? Well whaddayer know......" :Pirate:
HASBRO: One piece vinyl inaction figures statues is the exciting new direction for the emerging couldn't give a rats azz generation... :Pirate:
HASBRO: Internal Newsletter headline: "Now employing even more trained monkeys for better effiency and higher workforce morale! - Productivity at all time low..." :Pirate:
HASBRO: Go take a flying f*** at a rolling donut! :mad:

01-29-2002, 08:50 PM
Hasbro: We Really Do Care... About Your Money

Hasbro: Where our phone number says it all - (800)FART-BOG

Hasbro: Mismanagement Forever

01-29-2002, 09:25 PM
Hasbro-The New King of action figures Statues

Hasbro-Only 3 points of articulation per serving

Hasbro-Starwars fans?...We know nothing of this

01-29-2002, 10:40 PM
Hasbro...we do chicken right.

Hasbro...it takes a lickin' and...well, that's it really.

Hasbro...Heartbeat of America! (oh, wait. That's not us)

Hasbro...we earn money the old fashioned way...we con it out of you.

just buy it

Hasbro...over 11 billion served. (Now, that's 11 billion divided by $7 bucks per figure, carry the 2...)

01-30-2002, 12:59 AM
The Company formerally known as Kenner.
H aling A ll S uckers B uying R esculpts O ften
Just shut up
Zero Points of Articulaton
Pack-ins Shmack-ins
Merry Christmas - You're fired!
Can't find the latest wave? Wait 2 years and we'll dump them on TRU for $2 ea
We'll make up our own EU figures thank you!
If at first we don't succeed, fail, fail again.
Raising figure prices...$1 at a time.
McFarlane MUST die!
Supporting sweat shops for over 20 years!
No demand for playsets
Supporting eBay for over 4 years!
Order direct from us? That would never work.

01-30-2002, 01:16 AM
Hasbro - Giving Collectors what they've always wanted since 1978 Giving collectors what they dont need since 1978

Emperor Howdy
01-30-2002, 01:54 AM
Hasbro: You want articulation, We want the arm back....the ball's in YOUR court.

Hasbro: Oh shut up, you'd do the same thing.

Hasbro: Customer Service is Job One! (Return to Sender....."If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again.....)

Hasbro: We're laughing WITH you.....really......

Hasbro: Go ahead, keep on b**ching....remember the Eopie?

Hasbro: Would you prefer Mattel instead? "Summer Fun Jar Jar"? We thought not.

Hasbroken wallets since 1978.

Hasblo: Us.

Hasbro: .....:Pirate: ...arrrrrrrgh!

01-30-2002, 02:30 AM
I think that the three best taglines for Hasbro, have to take into account the way fans continue to complain about any little thing that is wrong with a figure would have to be:

Hasbro: Trying to please ungrateful fans since 1978!

Hasbro: This is a figure, this is a figure in action, any questions?

Hasbro: Collector's demand action removed from E2!!!

Remember, E2 is from the reviews of the script, action packed. Supposedly the most action packed Star Wars film to date. If the entire time a jedi appears on screen they are in a fighting stance, and kicking some arse, do you want them posed like the are just standing still? Just my two daktaries. Remember, this post is a joke, I'm poking fun at all of us. It's not meant to cause a flame war. :D


Jar Jar Binks

01-30-2002, 06:01 AM
Specail figures do upset us.
We will make no figure,that you want.
Over 6 billion sold[HEHeHe]
We'er there when you don't need us.

Darth Cruel
02-02-2002, 11:07 PM
give Hasbro a... never mind. I couldn't even finish typing it with a straight face.

And, unfortunately, I can't think up a slogan bad enough to fit.

Rollo Tomassi
02-03-2002, 10:18 AM
Hasbro: Last year was for the fans, this year is for our wallets.
Hasbro: Did somebody say something?
Hasbro: George is breathing down our necks to get you pasty fan boys to quit buying the figures so that the little kids have a shot at them...
Hasbro: We put the "oy" in Toy!
Hasbro: We put the 'arse' in Star Wars(e)!
Hasbro: There's no way were makin' an Imperial Shuttle now, you ungrateful little SOBs...

02-03-2002, 10:25 AM
Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
Hasbro: Last year was for the fans, this year is for our wallets.
Hasbro: Did somebody say something?
Hasbro: George is breathing down our necks to get you pasty fan boys to quit buying the figures so that the little kids have a shot at them...
Hasbro: We put the "oy" in Toy!
Hasbro: We put the 'arse' in Star Wars(e)!
Hasbro: There's no way were makin' an Imperial Shuttle now, you ungrateful little SOBs...


02-04-2002, 07:37 AM
Hasbro: We know no shame

El Chuxter
02-04-2002, 02:14 PM
We really don't care.
We really do care--just not about you.
Canada? What's that?
More Obi-Wan's in a year than Snake Eyeses in twenty!
Ruining Batman for the next generation!
The folks who brought you Sith Apprentice Maul.
The folks who brought you a new Tatooine Luke for every movie frame he appears in!
Making Micro Machines available at KB with cheesy resculpts of action figures!
Wookit the pwetty Bespin Guard. Wookit, wookit! Forget the new Obi-Wan.
Making your 1995 figures look more inadequate by the day. (Except when you display them with the new Carbon Freeze Chamber.)
Mixing lots bad repaints and resculpts in a case with that one special figure, who will have a wonderful home on the rack at your local $calper’s shop.
Remember, we made the Transformers! (Unless you’re complaining about the non-transforming Droidekas.)
Losing rights to GIJoe character names since 1997.
New figures and 1977 vehicles--what a combination!