Which of these stories is more pathetic?

[El Chuxter]

Two stories I saw near the top of the pile on Yahoo! News' entertainment page:


Britney Spears wants hot career comeback

NEW YORK - Britney Spears is putting fans on notice: Be prepared for her hot career comeback.

"The last couple of years have been quite a ride for me, the media has criticized my every move and printed a skewed perception of who I really am as a human being," the 25-year-old pop star/tabloid target writes in a posting Friday on her Web site.

Spears, who filed for divorce in November from Kevin Federline, 28, her husband of two years, says she is now more mature and free to explore her next move "as an entertainer with absolutely no strings attached."

"I look forward to coming back this year bigger and better than ever," writes Spears, who says she wants to go on tour and hopes her new album will be released later this year.

"I noticed today that one of my biggest fansites is shutting down soon and I want you all to know that I do understand all the reasons that went behind making that decision, and I am sad to see it closing," she writes. "If I were you I'd be unhappy too if I had to read what I've been reading every day."

Spears, the mother of 3-month-old Jayden James and 1-year-old Sean Preston, has drawn disapproval from fans and other Spears watchers for her recent nights out with party girls Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan. Her manager denied Monday reports that she had collapsed shortly after leading the New Year's Eve countdown in a Las Vegas nightclub.

Says Spears: "Trust me, I get it. I know I've been far from perfect."


'SNL' alum Chris Kattan engaged to model

NEW YORK - Chris Kattan, a former cast member of NBC's "Saturday Night Live," became engaged to model Sunshine Tutt on Christmas Eve, his spokeswoman, Jill Fritzo, said Friday.

Fritzo declined to give details. In a story on its Web site, People magazine reported that Kattan, 36, proposed to Tutt at her grandparents' home in Gainesville, Texas. The couple have been dating since spring 2005 and plan to wed next year, the magazine said.

Kattan starred in the comedies "Corky Romano" and "A Night at the Roxbury."

He voices Polar Penguin in the upcoming animated movie "Foodfight!"

Okay, y'all, here's the question. Which is more ridiculously pathetic?

A) Britney Spears apparently really does believe anyone gives a rat's you-know-what about her anymore

or

B) Someone not only would be attracted to Chris Kattan, regardless of gender or sexual preference, but is also saddled with the name "Sunshine Tutt"?

[Jargo]

britney wins. anyone who even associates with the hilton thing deserves to be burned at the stake. vile beast by association. the hilton thing is like some sort of socially transmitted disease.

[Blue2th]

Both are pretty dang pathetic. Every time I think of Britney lately I think of the phrase "you can take the trash out of the trailer, but you can't take the trailer out of the trash" As far as Chris "Mango" Kattan, he picked someone with an excellent name for his "cover" I would, like for example Ann Coulter, check to see if Sunshine has an adam's apple.

[Kidhuman]

And here I thought it was stories from the workplace. Who cares about either of these 2?

[2-1B]

Spears, who filed for divorce in November from Kevin Federline, 28, her husband of two years, says she is now more mature and free to explore her next move "as an entertainer with absolutely no strings attached."

No strings...except for her two kids, of course. :rolleyes:

[Rogue II]

I still fail to see society's facination with celebrites' personal lives. Unless Chris Kattan starts jumping on couches and joins scientology, Britney Spears seems a bit more pathetic. The Chris Kattan thing was more of an announcement while the Britney Spears blurb is a grab for attention. She may as well do coincide a new album with a Playboy photo shoot. They can airbrush her up real nice and it will get people talking about her to generate interest in the album. And the photos in Playboy will be more dignified than those photos of her getting out of a limo.

[El Chuxter]

I wasn't referring to Kattan being pathetic. If someone that incredibly fugly can find true love, all the better for him!

I was talking about the name of his bride-to-be. Someone gave that poor girl that name, which should be considered child abuse.

[LTBasker]

Chux, it probably isn't her real name as models usually make their own stage name to keep privacy in their non-modelling life. If it were her real name though, what a headtrip. :crazed: Either way someone had to be hitting some acid to come up with it.

[General_Grievous]

Britney is more pathetic. Her kids would be better off dead. I'd rather be dead than have Britney and K-Fed as parents.

[stillakid]

Britney is more pathetic. Her kids would be better off dead. I'd rather be dead than have Britney and K-Fed as parents.

Well, K-Fed, yeah. But to have that MILF? Imagine her hot Mom-friends pulling a Mrs. Robinson on you. Purrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

[Slicker]

Well, K-Fed, yeah. But to have that MILF? Imagine her hot Mom-friends pulling a Mrs. Robinson on you. Purrrrrrrrrrrrrr.I'm glad someone was man enough to say it. Although Brit is skanky, having the skankier Paris Hilton over would be a definite plus...at least you'd be guaranteed a clam shot from one of the two.

[stillakid]

I'm glad someone was man enough to say it. Although Brit is skanky, having the skankier Paris Hilton over would be a definite plus...at least you'd be guaranteed a clam shot from one of the two.

I mean, let's be honest here. Britney got where she is because she was A) super hot, B) played the "I'm a teenager that you want to F*** but you know you never will, and C) the music isn't that bad (it's got a good beat and you can dance to it).

So she goes and gets herself knocked up trailerpark style by some loser hangeron-er and ruins that faux "innocent" teen girl next door thing that made her so desirable.

But after some personal training and a video or two, she's still got a bod that can stop a truck. She knows what side her bread is buttered on, not that she necessarily needs to serve it anymore. But you know..... We all know she isn't freakin' Mozart, but she was never selling herself that way in the first place. Nothing wrong with that. :love:

[plasticfetish]

Britney who?

BTW, this (http://www.kimdawsonagency.com/images/talent/imgF3253E11_103E_01BC_0BE792302A1AA2EE.jpg) is Sunshine Tutt. (I dunno, I think Kattan's doing okay.)

[Blue2th]

Britney who?

BTW, this (http://www.kimdawsonagency.com/images/talent/imgF3253E11_103E_01BC_0BE792302A1AA2EE.jpg) is Sunshine Tutt. (I dunno, I think Kattan's doing okay.)
Well, Sunshine Tutt is lookin' good. And no adam's apple that I can see. She probably got that name from her acid trippin' parents as mentioned above. Still Sunshine Tutt is better than Sunshine Hutt! lol

[Slicker]

BTW, this (http://www.kimdawsonagency.com/images/talent/imgF3253E11_103E_01BC_0BE792302A1AA2EE.jpg) is Sunshine Tutt. (I dunno, I think Kattan's doing okay.)Dear God!! Give her a sammich!!

[El Chuxter]

But that would quadruple her weight.

[General_Grievous]

I'm glad someone was man enough to say it. Although Brit is skanky, having the skankier Paris Hilton over would be a definite plus...at least you'd be guaranteed a clam shot from one of the two.


Sure, if you like boning coke *****s with chlamydia. A dog wouldn't even **** them. Britney Spears used to be hot (remember that schoolgirl outfit?) but now she's hit a wall. Have you seen that pic of her in USA Today? She looks like she's 50! And don't get me started on the pantyless shot. Looked like rotten roast beef with a C-section scar. If you want to ogle a chick, ogle someone like Scarlett Johansson, not the skank squad of Britney and Paris.

[El Chuxter]

I may have said it before, but those "accidental" pantyless shots aren't accidental. Have you ever known anyone to "accidentally" show off their goodies?

No, it's a calculated scam to get attention. Because the news will pick up on it, they seem like a victim, few people see the actual pictures, and then they can stage press conference after press conference talking about how "victimized" they are.

Seriously. Even a woman going commando and wearing a cheerleader outfit isn't going to accidentally reveal herself. Unless she does it accidentally on purpose, as the expression goes.

[El Chuxter]

So, um, whatever happened to "the upcoming movie Foodfight"? That's the only info I ever read about it.

[2-1B]

Win a Phone Call from Chris !!!

http://www.chriskattan.net/

[JON9000]

Haters. Everyone with a wife or girlfriend as bang-down hot as Kattan's, raise your hand. :razz:

[2-1B]

I actually like Chris Kattan, A Night at the Roxbury is one of my favorite comedies. :)