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Beast
08-24-2007, 03:04 PM
I'm surprised that noone has started a thread on this yet. Due to the success of Transformers, Paramount Pictures has put G.I. Joe into production to be the next big Summer movie based off a toy line. Paramount wanted Stephen Sommers to direct, but he initally opted out when they refused to meet his $10 Million Dollar paycheck.

However it appears Paramount caved, and pre-production is now underway with a script currently being written by Stuart Beattie (30 Days of Night, Collateral, and Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl). It sounds like the film will focus on Destro as the primary villain. And G.I. Joe will be a Brussels based group.

Paramount Pictures has confirmed that Stephen Sommers (Van Helsing, The Mummy Returns, The Mummy) will direct G.I. Joe, the live-action feature based on Hasbro's line of action figures.

IESB.net, meanwhile, says the studio has also hired Stuart Beattie (30 Days of Night, Collateral, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl) to write the new script.

A February production start is planned for a summer 2009 release.

Variety says the accelerated production schedule began right after Sommers pitched his version of the film to Paramount chairman-CEO Brad Grey and production president Brad Weston on Wednesday evening. He was hired in the room.

The pitch reportedly goes as follows: "G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer."

Lorenzo di Bonaventura will produce with Hasbro chief operating officer Brian Goldner. Sommers and his Sommers Co. partner Bob Ducsay will also be involved as producers.

Hasbro's Goldner said that the mythology of G.I Joe was fleshed out during the 1980s through 155 issues of Marvel Comics, as well as an animated TV series. There are about 30 core characters, good and evil, that can be exploited in films.

"Marrying Steve's vision with 25 years of this brand mythology feels like a great way to go forward," Goldner said.

"Our vision (for 'The Mummy') was clear the time the first trailer played during the Super Bowl, and by the time this one plays a Super Bowl, you'll see the coolest characters and visuals you can imagine, and beyond-state-of-the-art equipment," Sommers said. "I wouldn't have jumped into this just because of the Hasbro-Transformers tie. Remember, 'Pirates of the Caribbean was a big hit, but 'Haunted Mansion' not so much."

"My experience with beloved properties is that characters, attitude and tone are even more important than plot," di Bonaventura said. "Paramount showed a great deal of confidence in Stephen's take, and our ability as producers to get this up and running for a February start. His passion for the characters and the world convinced the studio this was something they couldn't resist."

BountyHunterScum
08-24-2007, 03:30 PM
Global what a joke, most if not all Joe's are American. The majority are definitely from the USA.

Beast
08-24-2007, 03:33 PM
Global what a joke, most if not all Joe's are American. The majority are definitely from the USA.
Yeah, but that's not going to fly in today's world. Considering what most of the world thinks of America, it's the right way to go. Not going to turn this into a political discussion, and I'll club anyone who tries... this means you Tycho. Besides, making them an international organization makes more sense anyway.

Kidhuman
08-24-2007, 03:39 PM
I guess they arent Real American Heroes anymore.

preacher
08-24-2007, 03:50 PM
Oh dear god. So now we have GI JOE a united nations american hero? What nonsense. And Destro is the main villain? Ugh

If Paramount were really courageous they would focus on Cobra Commander as the main villain. Ever sense V for Vendetta came out, and was told well, I've always thought that a GI JOE movie that touched on the Cobra Commander backstory would work. In case you don't know it CC was an average Joe car salesman who runs into extremely bad luck with the IRS. The stress ends up destroying his relationship with his wife and so consequently CC starts the cobra terrorist organization.

I read the first ten issues of GI JOE reloaded and was very very impressed. Such a story I think would resonate really well. Especially the State the Union is in. At least I know it would with me.

This whole united nations heros theme is pretty chicken**** if you ask me. Let the balls drop and tell the story the way it should be told. Once again a good story is going to be butchered because of political correctness.

Beast
08-24-2007, 03:56 PM
They might be wanting to save Cobra Commander for the sequel.

Especially if they establish the character at some point in the film.

JON9000
08-24-2007, 05:20 PM
Will they have the Baroness? Have you guys seen that youtube video of her and Destro set to a a biggie song? Hilarious.

pbarnard
08-24-2007, 05:29 PM
Should see the trashing at joe forums, it's more hilarious than transformers' fans and the build up to that movie. They've played up and down everything from the relationship to the Air Force, to the script, about version 14088867 since the 87 toon movie.

BountyHunterScum
08-24-2007, 06:00 PM
I guess they arent Real American Heroes anymore.

Then this American(me), is not gonna go see it.

Beast
08-24-2007, 06:23 PM
There's a slightly different version of the story over on Variety's website. That mentions that much like Michael Bay, Hasbro indoctrinated Sommers into G.I. Joe lore. Also that there are plans for Monopoly and Battleship movies in motion.

Stephen Sommers to direct 'G.I. Joe'
Paramount sets summer 2009 release date
By MICHAEL FLEMING

Paramount Pictures has set Stephen Sommers to direct "G.I. Joe," the live-action feature based on Hasbro's line of action figures.

The studio is hiring a writer immediately, and has set a February production start for a summer 2009 release.

The accelerated production schedule began right after Sommers pitched his version of the film to Par chairman-CEO Brad Grey and production prexy Brad Weston on Wednesday evening. He was hired in the room.

Lorenzo di Bonaventura will produce with Hasbro chief operating officer Brian Goldner. Sommers and his Sommers Co. partner Bob Ducsay will also be involved as producers.

While "G.I. Joe" served several futile tours of duty as a movie property, its momentum has been helped by "Transformers," the movie transfer of another Hasbro brand. That di Bonaventura-produced film has grossed $667 million worldwide for studio partners DreamWorks and Paramount.

Hasbro's Goldner said that the mythology of G.I Joe was fleshed out during the 1980s through 155 issues of Marvel Comics, as well as an animated TV series. There are about 30 core characters, good and evil, that can be exploited in films.

"Marrying Steve's vision with 25 years of this brand mythology feels like a great way to go forward," Goldner said.

While some remember the character from its gung-ho fighting man '60s incarnation, he's evolved. G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer. The property is closer in tone to "X-Men" and James Bond than a war film.

"Our vision (for "The Mummy") was clear the time the first trailer played during the Super Bowl, and by the time this one plays a Super Bowl, you'll see the coolest characters and visuals you can imagine, and beyond-state-of-the-art equipment," Sommers said. "I wouldn't have jumped into this just because of the Hasbro-Transformers tie. Remember, 'Pirates of the Caribbean was a big hit, but 'Haunted Mansion' not so much."

Di Bonaventura said the film has some of the elements that made "Transformers" work as a film.

"My experience with beloved properties is that characters, attitude and tone are even more important than plot," di Bonaventura said. "Paramount showed a great deal of confidence in Stephen's take, and our ability as producers to get this up and running for a February start. His passion for the characters and the world convinced the studio this was something they couldn't resist."

WMA plugged its client Sommers into Hasbro, which left CAA to become a WMA client earlier this summer. Sommers haunted Hasbro's Pawtucket headquarters to steep himself in the lore.

WMA is also helping Hasbro with possible movies based on such properties as the board games "Monopoly" and "Battleship."
http://www.variety.com/article/VR1117970752.html?categoryid=13&cs=1&nid=2562

El Chuxter
08-24-2007, 07:04 PM
Snake Eyes had better be in it. And Scarlett had better not be "with" that putz Duke. She's Snake Eyes' babe. Period.

General_Grievous
08-24-2007, 08:38 PM
I am kind of glad Destro is the main villain. I always liked him better than Cobra Commander.

2-1B
08-24-2007, 09:06 PM
Also that there are plans for Monopoly and Battleship movies in motion.

Fantastic, what's next? Movies based on Hungry Hungry Hippos and Connect Four?

Beast
08-24-2007, 09:08 PM
Fantastic, what's next? Movies based on Hungry Hungry Hippos and Connect Four?
Depending on the story, I could see it.

Remember Checkers The Movie from Robot Chicken. :D

2-1B
08-24-2007, 09:20 PM
Depending on the story, I could see it.

Remember Checkers The Movie from Robot Chicken. :D

CandyLand and Chutes & Ladders could also be good. lol

Kidhuman
08-24-2007, 09:35 PM
I am all for Operation, the Movie. To see a doctor pulling a horsie from Charlie would be sweet.

El Chuxter
08-24-2007, 09:47 PM
Only if it features Laurence Fishburne as the voice of the charlie horse.

Rocketboy
08-24-2007, 09:48 PM
Based on the pitch I'd rather watch "Connect Four: The Movie" than this GI Joe farce.




How soon before Hollywood starts banging on Mab's door for his "Burgertime" script?

plasticfetish
08-24-2007, 10:03 PM
"G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer."I hope this means that Dolph Lundgren (http://www.dolphlundgren.com/) will be involved somehow.

darko666
08-24-2007, 10:27 PM
taken from the article: "Paramount Pictures has confirmed that Stephen Sommers (Van Helsing, The Mummy Returns, The Mummy) will direct G.I. Joe, the live-action feature based on Hasbro's line of action figures."

i'll let the Benders express my thoughts on this. (http://youtube.com/watch?v=F8s7dz2qanA&mode=related&search=)

El Chuxter
08-24-2007, 10:37 PM
Snake Eyes will kick someone in the crotch if they do this movie wrong. He'll kick 'em till their noses bleed. He's no pacifist wussie like Optimus Prime. That's why the Transformers movie sucks so badly.

figrin bran
08-25-2007, 01:24 AM
Snake Eyes will kick someone in the crotch if they do this movie wrong. He'll kick 'em till their noses bleed. He's no pacifist wussie like Optimus Prime. That's why the Transformers movie sucks so badly.

If only that alone were the cause of the TF movie's suckiness!

I have a really bad feeling about this particular film. It's probably going to be watered down and as derivative of other military action films as possible.


Tycho might be the only one on this board that'll like it! haha.

El Chuxter
08-25-2007, 01:25 AM
If Baroness has a nude scene, it's all good.

bigbarada
08-25-2007, 02:06 AM
GI Joe as an international military force = lame, politically correct, piece of crap movie.:mad:

The historical term "GI Joe" was intended to specifically refer to American troops in WW2. If they are going to turn it into a UN fighting force, then why even use the name GI Joe? Why not the Pluralist Pansy Squad? I can see having international members of the team, that's been incorporated into the ARAH concept from the beginning, but it needs to remain a primarily American fighting force in order to stay true to the source material.

JediTricks
08-25-2007, 03:35 AM
Yeah, but that's not going to fly in today's world. Considering what most of the world thinks of America, it's the right way to go. Not going to turn this into a political discussion, and I'll club anyone who tries... this means you Tycho. Besides, making them an international organization makes more sense anyway.Yeah, just look how well it played with the Street Fighter Van Damme film, that was fantastic. :rolleyes: No wait, that sucked so bad it shamed Raul Julia to death. Pandering to foreign audiences is stupid, foreign audiences eat up America-centric movies like this, while American audiences generally shun this multiculturalism crappola in their movies.

Plus, this movie is going to be based on GI Joe: A Real American Hero - can't screw with that!!!

(As an aside, the Street Fighter movie's toys were a sub-line of the GI Joe:ARAH brand at that time, so the snake has come full circle to eat its own behind.)


All that aside, I wonder why they're going forward with this after Don Murphy decided to do Transformers instead of GI Joe (he had bought the rights to do the latter first, it led to the former) because GI Joe wouldn't work in a climate where real American soldiers were in an authentic war, it wouldn't be appropriate.

Phantom-like Menace
08-25-2007, 09:21 AM
The historical term "GI Joe" was intended to specifically refer to American troops in WW2. If they are going to turn it into a UN fighting force, then why even use the name GI Joe? (...) I can see having international members of the team (...)

Okay, with some minor cutting, I agree 100% with the above sections of your post. Making it an acronym seems even more overburdened with stupidity. They should have just called it Action Man and alienated everyone. Is this the same script that decides Cobra Commander was Duke's best friend (or something like that) and operated as a commando codenamed (I swear I'm not making this up) Cool Dude?

BountyHunterScum
08-25-2007, 12:21 PM
GI Joe as an international military force = lame, politically correct, piece of crap movie.:mad:

The historical term "GI Joe" was intended to specifically refer to American troops in WW2. If they are going to turn it into a UN fighting force, then why even use the name GI Joe? Why not the Pluralist Pansy Squad? I can see having international members of the team, that's been incorporated into the ARAH concept from the beginning, but it needs to remain a primarily American fighting force in order to stay true to the source material.

Damn straight. I think there are some Joes from overseas but the main group is totally American. In the interest of accuracy, Snake Eyes is a blonde haired white guy so they need to find someone who fits that criteria who isn't too tall. Ninja's typically are in the 5'6" to 6' range, they average about 5'9". Ray Park does fit that height and blonde hair but do we really want Darth Maul? SE is also a mute. Storm Shadow is American too, he's from Frisco and Japanese. Like I said, if they go ahead with the global pansy force I'm out.

El Chuxter
08-25-2007, 12:45 PM
Damn straight. I think there are some Joes from overseas but the main group is totally American.

Big Ben = English
Various former Oktober Guard members = Russian

I think that's it?

BountyHunterScum
08-25-2007, 01:10 PM
Big Ben = English
Various former Oktober Guard members = Russian

I think that's it?

Yeah Big Bear was Russian/part of the Oktober Guard. Big Ben and Big Bear LOL. The Russians weren't actually part of the Joes they allied with us on several occasions against a common foe. I'm not really up to date on all of this so I had to look it up.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oktober_Guard

El Chuxter
08-25-2007, 01:45 PM
One of them (Dainia?) officially joined up, but that was well into the Devil's Due run.

Ji'dai
08-25-2007, 01:57 PM
Yecch!

Larry Hama is probably turning over in his grave right now. Though if the new EuroJoes have to prevent Cobra-la from taking over the world, it'll be prefect. Pefect piece of ****, that is.

Cobra-la-la-la-la-la!

El Chuxter
08-25-2007, 02:18 PM
Larry Hama is probably turning over in his grave right now.

Only if he decided to test it out early to make sure it was deep enough. Or if he was actually killed years ago and replaced by a Crimson Guardsman who is now writing comics under his name. ;)

2-1B
08-25-2007, 02:32 PM
As long as William The Refridgerator Perry and Sgt Slaughter are in it, I'll watch it.

El Chuxter
08-25-2007, 02:56 PM
And Rocky Balboa.

Don't forget Rocky.

2-1B
08-25-2007, 03:01 PM
HOLY HELL Chux, I don't think I ever knew that !!!!

I thought you were being silly at first but I looked it up and sure enough there was talk about it... http://scoop.diamondgalleries.com/scoop_article.asp?ai=2606&si=126

Ji'dai
08-25-2007, 04:29 PM
Only if he decided to test it out early to make sure it was deep enough. Or if he was actually killed years ago and replaced by a Crimson Guardsman who is now writing comics under his name. ;) Yeah, well, I didn't mean literally.

I thought I had a Rocky Balboa figure since I remember one of them having boxing gloves and a punching bag as accessories. Turns out it was Big Boa (http://www.yojoe.com/action/87/allgearedup/bigboa.shtml).

El Chuxter
08-25-2007, 06:55 PM
Okay, just checking. 'Cause you know Cobra Commander was killed years ago by a Crimson Guardsman who took his place and served as an incompetent replacement Cobra Commander, resulting in the Cobra Civil War. Luckily the real deal got better and came back and killed him (along with that putz Raptor and a bunch of other fellas).

Ji'dai
08-25-2007, 10:21 PM
That seems vaguely familiar. Wasn't his name Fred or something?

Qui-Long Gone
08-26-2007, 02:50 PM
I think it was Fred VI or something...and CC came back from the dead eventually....like everyone else in the GI Joe universe.


I have always dreamed of a live action film of GI Joe....that is, until this thread....now I paraphrase a scene in 28 Days Later where the dead parents left a note to their comatose son: DON'T WAKE UP....

Qui-Long Gone
08-26-2007, 02:51 PM
If Baroness has a nude scene, it's all good.

You know the Baroness was very badly damaged in a fire and that's why she dresses like she does...do you really want that nude scene now?

Beast
08-26-2007, 02:55 PM
You know the Baroness was very badly damaged in a fire and that's why she dresses like she does...do you really want that nude scene now?
Are you kidding. You just made El Chuxter want it even more. ;) :D

BountyHunterScum
08-26-2007, 03:18 PM
You know the Baroness was very badly damaged in a fire and that's why she dresses like she does...do you really want that nude scene now?

She had extensive plastic surgery so her assets should be fine.

JON9000
08-27-2007, 11:59 AM
I nominate a bottle blackened Stacey Keibler to play the Baroness, dubbed, of course, by Morgana Lofting.

darko666
08-27-2007, 02:03 PM
Monica Bellucci is the perfect actress for the Baroness. (http://www.wallpaperbase.com/wallpapers/celebs/monicabellucci/monica_bellucci_10.jpg)

Droid
08-27-2007, 03:28 PM
1. Is Larry Hama dead?
2. Why would they save Cobra Commander for the sequel? How about they
make a movie with all the main characters and not worry so much about
the sequel? I could kind of see saving Zartan for a sequel, but Cobra
Commander, Destro, and Baroness need to be right there at Cobra
central. Transformers chose to ignore the Megatron-Starscream-
Soundwave-Shockwave dynamic of the Decepticons and it was a big
mistake. Don't do the same with Cobra.
3. Wonder if they'll do away with the metal mask because they won't know
whether to have the mask's mouth move or not. I'll bet he dons some
special battle mask for one fight scene and yet we're to think it is
Destro.
4. Wonder if they'll feel the need to get rid of everyone's code names
because it isn't realistic or something.
5. Must haves for the first film:
Cobra - Cobra Commander, Destro, Baroness, Colonel Bludd (they could
kill him), and Storm Shadow.
G.I. Joe - Hawk, Scarlett, Snake-Eyes, Gung-Ho, Stalker, Roadblock.
Perhaps Rock n' Roll, Grunt, Clutch, Doc, Wild Bill,
Ace, any one of whom they could kill.
6. "G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated
Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use
hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a
double-crossing Scottish arms dealer." OK, well that is enough right there.
If G.I. Joe isn't American and Destro is running Cobra I won't see it so
that's enough. And doesn't it sound like they are going more for
Misson Impossible than G.I. Joe. And if Destro is running Cobra why
does he need to be "double-crossing"? Who is he "double crossing" if he
is a villain AND in charge?

Could wait for the sequl IMO - Zartan, Dreadknocks, Firefly (just Storm Shadow in a different outfit), Duke (if ever), Roadblock, Serpentor (if ever), Tomax and Xamot (if ever), Dr. Mindbender (if ever).

Kidhuman
08-27-2007, 03:39 PM
4. Wonder if they'll feel the need to get rid of everyone's code names
because it isn't realistic or something.
5. Must haves for the first film:
Cobra - Cobra Commander, Destro, Baroness, Colonel Bludd (they could
kill him), and Storm Shadow.


I thought it was Major Bludd

El Chuxter
08-27-2007, 03:54 PM
Major Sebastian Bludd, to be exact.

And, no, Hama's not dead. If he is, someone is pretending to write Storm Shadow under his name.

And they could not kill Wild Bill. He's too damned cool.

Also, if they scrap code names, Snake Eyes can't appear. Even with all the origin stories, he's still the one guy we know very, very little about--including his name. They've already ruined Wolverine by filling in every microsecond of his bio, so why not leave the other great mystery character alone? (In other words, they'll include him, and he'll be named Rodney Longbottom and be played by Rowan Atkinson.)

BountyHunterScum
08-27-2007, 04:12 PM
Major Sebastian Bludd, to be exact.

And, no, Hama's not dead. If he is, someone is pretending to write Storm Shadow under his name.

And they could not kill Wild Bill. He's too damned cool.

Also, if they scrap code names, Snake Eyes can't appear. Even with all the origin stories, he's still the one guy we know very, very little about--including his name. They've already ruined Wolverine by filling in every microsecond of his bio, so why not leave the other great mystery character alone? (In other words, they'll include him, and he'll be named Rodney Longbottom and be played by Rowan Atkinson.)

You forgot John A Dickhead.

preacher
08-27-2007, 07:34 PM
With as popular as 24 is I don't understand Paramount's thinking on this one. Jack Bauer is like all the Joes rolled into a singularity of two-fisted cool. Obviously people have an appetite for shows of this nature. Politically incorrect, american central, counter-terrorism plots. Yeah got 24, the unit, and the cell to name a few.

If GI JOE was a code for a elite branch of CTU or something, THAT would be cool. They could have the original 13 lineup which consisted of Snake Eyes, Scarlett, Grunt, Zap, Clutch, Stalker, etc.

Cobra Commander could make his start as a Timothy McVeigh type, an American who views himself so patriotic he wishes to reduce the size of government the quickest means possible, by destroying it.

The scope of GI JOE is too deep to have anyone but Cobra Commander and the Baroness in the beginning. Baroness would be necessary for continuity into a sequel that would showcase Destro's strength. Showing Destro in the beginning undermines what Cobra is about. Hell, in the original comic series that marvel made in the 80s Destro wasn't hinted at until issue 10 ( I think ) and didn't even make an offical appearance until issue no. 14. I still remember the cover art.

Having destro immediately makes no sense and Destro as a character, I'm sorry, he may be cool looking, but as a villain he is very cliche'. Cobra Commander, if given the respect he deserves, is a very interesting character.

Droid
08-27-2007, 10:24 PM
I thought it was Major Bludd

I am so kicking myself for that mistake. I guess I thought he deserved a promotion for his bad poetry!

El Chuxter
08-28-2007, 12:05 AM
The good thing about Destro is that, though he's a totally evil bad guy, he does have a sense of honor and even a bit of a conscience (though overshadowed by his greed and devotion to Anastasia). It makes him a great foil to Cobra Commander... but not a replacement.

JON9000
08-28-2007, 09:15 AM
With as popular as 24 is I don't understand Paramount's thinking on this one. Jack Bauer is like all the Joes rolled into a singularity of two-fisted cool. Obviously people have an appetite for shows of this nature. Politically incorrect, american central, counter-terrorism plots. Yeah got 24, the unit, and the cell to name a few.

24 was fine to start with but has become a running joke due to its formulaic nature "Jack Bauer tortured himself...." If you want to have fanatics trying to destroy the US, I think something like "True Lies" meets "X-men" would be a much better reference point than 24's soap opera with guns approach.

Ji'dai
08-28-2007, 12:29 PM
The new theme song has been released! You guys know the tune:

Yo Joe!
They’ll fight for freedom when the Americans are busy
Euro Joe is there!
Whenever Kraftwerk is playing in Stutgartt
Euro Joe is there!
Euro Joe, a real global hero!
Fighting to save the whales!

It’s Euro Joe against Cobra the enemy!
They’ll never give up the fight for total health care,
Euro Joe is there!
Plus coverage for life-partners regardless of gender -
Even during Oktoberfest while on a long bender!
Euro Joe is there!
Euro Joe, a real global hero!
Fighting to save the trees!

Euro Joe is the codename for Europe’s daring, highly trained special mission force. It's purpose: to defend human freedom against Cobra - a ruthless, capitalist multinational organization determined to rule the world.

They never give up.
They’ll stay til the fight's won.
Euro Joe will dare.
Euro Joe, a real global hero!
Fighting for two weeks paid vacation a year!
Euro Joe!
Yo Joe!

Droid
08-28-2007, 02:45 PM
Ji'dai, that was really, really funny!

The only two suggestions I might make are:

It’s Euro Joe against Destro the enemy!

AND

Euro Joe is the codename for Europe’s daring, highly trained special mission force. It's purpose: to defend human freedom against Cobra - an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer!

Ji'dai
08-28-2007, 03:46 PM
Those changes work for me, Droid :thumbsup:

Anyway, it'll sound a lot better coming out of David Hasselhof.

Qui-Long Gone
09-01-2007, 07:01 PM
Everything sounds better from Hasselhoff

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lKuQXGrFSQ0

DarthQuack
10-25-2007, 08:54 PM
Small update....

http://www.superherohype.com/news/topnews.php?id=6444

El Chuxter
10-25-2007, 10:13 PM
Wow, that was a lot of nothing. :)

30 core characters?

Snake Eyes, Hawk, Duke, Flint, Scarlett, Lady Jaye, Gung Ho, Stalker, Roadblock, Cobra Commander, Destro, Baroness deCobray, Firefly, Zartan, Storm Shadow, uhhhhhhh....

I can come up with half of them. If they count stupid Heavy Duty or Sergeant Slaughter as "core," they can bite me.

Mr Hama should write the screenplay. He created the SOBs, after all. And wrote them for almost fifteen years.

Qui-Long Gone
10-26-2007, 08:56 AM
I'd like to see all 30 'core characters.' Preferably I'd like to see all 30 at once in every scene. I hope by 'core' they do mean Cobra La, Serpentor, and the Street Fighter crossover. :laugh:

That idea worked well in X3 and made it easier to follow character storylines by giving limited screen time to everyone instead of focusing on individuals as in X1 and X2. :yes:

Also, as we've learned from the Batman films, more villians make it easier to justify your superheroes existance. :lipsrsealed:

Hopefully all 30 characters will be given sufficient back story so that by the time the film is over there are 5 minutes left for a blockbuster battle scene.:thumbsup:

El Chuxter
10-26-2007, 12:37 PM
I was about to point out that nothing in X3 worked, but then I read the rest of your post and realized you were being sarcastic.

figrin bran
10-26-2007, 09:48 PM
They only said "30 core characters that can be exploited in films" not "will be used".

Think about it, even if they cast 30 nobodies, that's still a huge percentage of the film's budget. Tack on the effects and producers and everything else and there's a film that no studio would dare tackle on.

Qui-Long Gone
10-27-2007, 12:42 PM
I promise you that however many they choose will be too many, too poorly developed, and too unecessary.

Blue2th
10-27-2007, 02:19 PM
Like most formula Hollywood movies, they will probably choose just a few interesting core characters, and main vilians like Cobra Commander and of course Destro.
They'll bring out a few of the other 30 for the main battle scene, ala the Genosis Arena.

BTW: I'm still waiting till I can afford the complete animated GI Joe cartoon series DVD set. That is worth having :thumbsup:

El Chuxter
10-27-2007, 03:03 PM
I thought Kid Rhino lost the rights before they released the second half of the final season on DVD?

Blue2th
10-27-2007, 03:46 PM
I thought Kid Rhino lost the rights before they released the second half of the final season on DVD?

Really? That would not be a good thing to buy the set without all episodes.

I know there were earlier releases of the series broken up into parts 1 of season 1, part 2 of season 1 etc., and I didn't want to buy them like that.

There is a new set release that looks like the one I'll buy, though the cheapest other than fighting for one on eBay is $129.00 http://www.tvaddicts.tv/movie/cartoon/G.I._Joe.html

The only thing bad is that this set says it does'nt have any special features like "behind the scenes" etc. which is kind of a bummer.

El Chuxter
10-27-2007, 05:22 PM
Hmmm.... Those say they're region-free DVDs, which could mean bootleg. (They also have current Devil's Due artwork, which none of the Rhino discs had.) I wouldn't have a problem with bootlegs, especially for something that's OOP like GIJoe, but I'd be wary of spending more than $100 on something that I'm not sure of the video quality of.

Tonysmo
10-28-2007, 12:16 AM
Chuck Norris as Snake-Eyes..


/Thread.







but seriously. I hope they pull this off. Ive already had my fill of movies that sucked... I might as well pop my Garbage Pail kids DVD back in..

Qui-Long Gone
10-30-2007, 06:16 PM
I would have Chuck Norris as Rock and Roll or a Dreadnock!

El Chuxter
10-31-2007, 06:44 PM
This message from Hasbro (http://www.hasbro.com/gijoe/default.cfm?page=News/Item&newsid=F285F255-D56F-E112-46FAEBF95750D7E9) looks promising. Not 100% assurance, since the company did greenlight the "Transformers" movie. But it looks like at least some of the rumors are untrue.

Blue2th
10-31-2007, 07:21 PM
That's good news. :thumbsup:

preacher
11-01-2007, 08:01 PM
Thats more like it. Thank you Hasbro for stepping up to the plate and telling the pansies in Hollywood to go back to drinking their Kool Aid.

Honestly, I never did understand the whole international argument. Correct me if I'm wrong but GI JOE toys and merchandise are sold in other countries besides the United States and fans have embraced the whole GI JOE concept, american patriotism and all right?

And thank you also for recognizing that Cobra, not Destro, is the antagonist. I'm cautiously optimistic. This movie seems to be heading on the right track. But as someone else pointed out the Transformer movie could have been improved.

El Chuxter
11-01-2007, 08:46 PM
Honestly, I never did understand the whole international argument. Correct me if I'm wrong but GI JOE toys and merchandise are sold in other countries besides the United States and fans have embraced the whole GI JOE concept, american patriotism and all right?

I'm not sure about everywhere, but they were sold as Action Force in the UK. Most of the character bios were changed to give them a more international appeal. I've tried without success to find any specifics.

Droid
11-02-2007, 03:31 PM
I didn't say they would be American, but that they would be based out of the Pit.

And Hawk is the leader of G.I. Joe, not Duke.

I don't trust them; it seemed cautiously worded in places.

Qui-Long Gone
11-13-2007, 05:45 PM
I don't trust them; it seemed cautiously worded in places.

I agree....I think this will NOT be the Joe we knew, for whatever that was worth.....

El Chuxter
11-13-2007, 05:55 PM
I heard that Snake Eyes won't be able to talk.

2-1B
11-14-2007, 09:38 PM
Will he be able to urinate on people ?

That's the most important thing...

Jedi_Master_Guyute
12-05-2007, 03:40 PM
Ray Park has been cast as Snake Eyes.

http://www.superherohype.com/news/topnews.php?id=6575

Debate and discuss, Joe fans!:thumbsup:

Blue2th
12-05-2007, 04:56 PM
Cool! Probably the right actor for the job.
He didn't do a whole lot of talking in TPM, so even if he doesn't talk in the GI Joe movie as Chux said, we know he's got those moves. Good choice I think.

JimJamBonds
12-05-2007, 07:41 PM
He didn't do a whole lot of talking in TPM, so even if he doesn't talk in the GI Joe movie as Chux said, we know he's got those moves. Good choice I think.

I thought somebody else did the voice of Darth Maul?

decadentdave
12-05-2007, 07:45 PM
I thought somebody else did the voice of Darth Maul?

Peter Serafinowicz (http://imdb.com/name/nm0784818/)

Thank God Snake Eyes doesn't speak and he wears a mask.

BountyHunterScum
12-05-2007, 09:31 PM
Damn straight. I think there are some Joes from overseas but the main group is totally American. In the interest of accuracy, Snake Eyes is a blonde haired white guy so they need to find someone who fits that criteria who isn't too tall. Ninja's typically are in the 5'6" to 6' range, they average about 5'9". Ray Park does fit that height and blonde hair but do we really want Darth Maul? SE is also a mute. Storm Shadow is American too, he's from Frisco and Japanese. Like I said, if they go ahead with the global pansy force I'm out.

Ain't that some funny sh-t, I suggested Ray Park for the job and it happened. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

2-1B
12-05-2007, 10:11 PM
BHS, you should suggest Tycho for a role in Transformers 2...and make his dream come true!!! :grin:

RooJay
12-06-2007, 01:58 AM
He's a bit on the short side, but I don't really think there's a better person for the job unless they were to cast name talent for Snake-Eyes' seldom seen face.

Luuuuuuke
12-06-2007, 01:59 AM
Great, a G.I. Joe movie. If it's true to the crappy cartoons, there will be more shooting than in a Rambo movie, but no one will get shot. In other words: The A-Team.

BountyHunterScum
12-06-2007, 07:16 AM
He's a bit on the short side, but I don't really think there's a better person for the job unless they were to cast name talent for Snake-Eyes' seldom seen face.

Ninjas are not very tall, they are in the 5'9 height area anyway. People who are tall are slow. A tall person as a ninja is not as effective as a shorter person.

RooJay
12-06-2007, 09:10 AM
Ninjas are not very tall, they are in the 5'9 height area anyway. People who are tall are slow. A tall person as a ninja is not as effective as a shorter person.

Oh, know a lot of ninjas?;)

JON9000
12-06-2007, 12:28 PM
Correct me if I'm wrong but GI JOE toys and merchandise are sold in other countries besides the United States and fans have embraced the whole GI JOE concept, american patriotism and all right?

Wrong.

GI JOE was marketed as "Action Man" abroad specifically to downplay the "Real American Hero" aspect. If GI JOE had any influence on my own patriotism I would have to look into the mirror and ask how cheaply my loyalty is bought and sold.

JediTricks
12-07-2007, 10:54 PM
Everybody loves a post that starts with "WRONG!" - I swear Jon, I thought your post was from one of our more notorious members for a second. :p (Not that you're not notorious as you are... )


Ray Park is interesting casting, but his moves are a tad frenetic compared to the more controlled, minimalistic Snake Eyes character. If Ray Park or the director can keep him a little restrained though, he's not a bad choice... though I will point out that if this is meant to be a franchise-starting film, his age may catch up to him by a second sequel.

scruffziller
12-08-2007, 02:51 PM
Great, a G.I. Joe movie. If it's true to the crappy cartoons, there will be more shooting than in a Rambo movie, but no one will get shot. In other words: The A-Team.


Are you posting from the year 1985? Where moviemakers are making those cinematic mistakes for the first time.

2-1B
12-09-2007, 04:05 PM
Ray Park is interesting casting, but his moves are a tad frenetic compared to the more controlled, minimalistic Snake Eyes character. If Ray Park or the director can keep him a little restrained though, he's not a bad choice... though I will point out that if this is meant to be a franchise-starting film, his age may catch up to him by a second sequel.

Wrong.

Just kidding, that's a good point about RP being a little up there in years...I just wanted to say Wrong. lol

Well, I suppose it's a role that could be recast over the life of the series (if it in fact becomes a series). :)

BountyHunterScum
12-10-2007, 08:31 AM
Oh, know a lot of ninjas?;)

In a manner of speaking. :lipsrsealed:

El Chuxter
12-10-2007, 10:19 AM
A tall person could actually be a more effective ninja, as people would expect a ninja to be shorter.

BountyHunterScum
12-11-2007, 12:48 PM
A tall person could actually be a more effective ninja, as people would expect a ninja to be shorter.

Actually people wouldn't expect anything. Just because they allegedly expect a shorter person doesn't mean a taller one is better. That's like expecting to race a Camaro but getting a Hummer instead.

El Chuxter
12-11-2007, 01:10 PM
If one is expecting a Camaro, a Hummer would be a true ninja. They're all about deception, y'know.

BTW, I read on aintitreallyfreakingneat.com that casting has begun. In addition to Snake Eyes, the following characters have been cast by director Michael Bay:

Cobra Commander: Dane Cook
Duke: Beyonce
Destro: Samuel L Jackson
Crystal Ball: Larry David
Dr Mindbender: John Chiklis
Roadblock: Emeril Lagasse
Robo-Joe: CG, voiced by Frank Welker
Serpentor: Michael Imperioli
and we can't forget Sergeant Slaughter, played in the movie by Hulk Hogan.

decadentdave
12-11-2007, 01:23 PM
Stephen Sommers is directing not Bay and it's MICHAEL Chiklis, not John. ANd Beyonce for Duke?

Blue2th
12-11-2007, 01:27 PM
Stephen Sommers is directing not Bay and it's MICHAEL Chiklis, not John. ANd Beyonce for Duke?
Whew! I was starting to worry there for a moment.

El Chuxter
12-11-2007, 01:53 PM
Please tell me you did not think I was being serious.

BountyHunterScum
12-11-2007, 03:48 PM
Please tell me you did not think I was being serious.

Thank god you were joking. I'm sick of hollywood changing the ethnicity of characters just to full the secret quota of theirs.

mabudonicus
12-11-2007, 04:09 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHA
That is one of the funniest exchanges I've ever seen on this site and I've seen a TON of 'em
:beard: Iso & Baws

seriously Chux knows the deal and that was a pretty good damn joke, damn it smells straight in here now

2-1B
12-11-2007, 11:16 PM
Cobra Commander: Dane Cook
Duke: Beyonce
Destro: Samuel L Jackson
Crystal Ball: Larry David
Dr Mindbender: John Chiklis
Roadblock: Emeril Lagasse
Robo-Joe: CG, voiced by Frank Welker
Serpentor: Michael Imperioli
Sergeant Slaughter: Hulk Hogan.
Lieutenant Lanny: mabudonicus

Qui-Long Gone
12-12-2007, 02:54 PM
I heard Tom Cruise was going to play both Tomax and Xamot in Bay's version.....

Qui-Long Gone
12-12-2007, 02:58 PM
I for one could go for a Beyonce/Duke casting providing there's a topless sunbathing montage ala Halle Berry/Swordfish....:whip:

El Chuxter
12-12-2007, 03:14 PM
It might make Duke suck less than he has in the past.

Qui-Long Gone
12-12-2007, 03:32 PM
I don't even know how I would put the words Duke, suck, and Beyonce in the same sentence and still be allowed to post a comment without feeling very dirty.....:shocked:

El Chuxter
12-12-2007, 03:36 PM
No one should ever post about Duke Sgt. Hauser without feeling dirty. He should've gotten the bullet that killed Doc. Stupid goody two-shoes doon-faced buttmunch.

BountyHunterScum
12-23-2007, 03:39 PM
Apparently GI Joe is still a global team instead of the proper US team it used to be. Scratch one movie off of my to see list.

decadentdave
12-23-2007, 09:46 PM
Apparently GI Joe is still a global team instead of the proper US team it used to be. Scratch one movie off of my to see list.

I don't see what the big deal is. G.I. Joe was a counter-terrorist task force with members of all different ethnicities and backgrounds whose job it was to defend human freedom against Cobra, a ruthless organization determined to rule the world. Of course they're going to be international. How does that ruin the strike team? It's no worse than adding flames to Optimus Prime or changing his cab from a Peterbuilt to a Kenworth or changing Bumblebee from a VW Bug to a Chevy Camaro and yet it was the biggest blockbuster of the year and a hit with so many fans. You have to expect that the Joes will be "updated" for their film as well. This ain't the 80's anymore.

2-1B
12-23-2007, 10:06 PM
Guys, this movie's gonna suck whether it's full of a diverse multinational team or a jingoistic American team...it will suck either way, so I don't know what's to argue about on that topic.

RooJay
12-31-2007, 10:06 PM
I don't see what the big deal is. G.I. Joe was a counter-terrorist task force with members of all different ethnicities and backgrounds whose job it was to defend human freedom against Cobra, a ruthless organization determined to rule the world. Of course they're going to be international. How does that ruin the strike team? It's no worse than adding flames to Optimus Prime or changing his cab from a Peterbuilt to a Kenworth or changing Bumblebee from a VW Bug to a Chevy Camaro and yet it was the biggest blockbuster of the year and a hit with so many fans. You have to expect that the Joes will be "updated" for their film as well. This ain't the 80's anymore.

Agreed. It certainly doesn't mean the movie will automatically suck at any rate. That's a rather small and silly sticking point anyway, if you ask me.

BountyHunterScum
01-05-2008, 10:00 AM
toobad as long as these pull this diversity global crap for GI Joe I'm not bothering with it. Most other countries can go straight to hell as far as I'm concerned, they spend most of their time crapping on us yet when it came to our money and goods they accepted those with open arms. Screw'em. The main tema must be American or I won't see the movie. It's a global truckload of crap so I'm not taking a whiff.

El Chuxter
01-05-2008, 12:44 PM
I take it you never bought any figures of Big Ben, Big Bear, Daina, Lt Gorsky, Horror Show, Major Bludd, Destro, Storm Shadow, Firefly, the Baroness, or most of the Dreadnoks?

2-1B
01-05-2008, 02:54 PM
don't forget Rocky Balboa, he was an Italian.

El Chuxter
01-05-2008, 02:56 PM
Yeah, but he was born in Philly.

Wild Weasel was, IIRC, from South Africa as well. I think Crystal Ball was from somewhere in eastern Europe.

Tomax and Xamot were American businessmen, and Dr Mindbender was an orthodontist whose mental painkilling experiments went awry, but I've always suspected those three embraced the love that dare not speak its name. Especially Mindbender. He seems like he'd be into all the pets, too. That's why Mutt made sure Junkyard stayed far away from him. After Mindbender captured Max and Sandstorm, those two were never the same.

BountyHunterScum
01-05-2008, 03:18 PM
Storm Shadow is American, I bought some of those figures but the core Joe team are Americans. Their allies are global and the non core members are global but the main team itself is American.

decadentdave
01-05-2008, 08:27 PM
toobad as long as these pull this diversity global crap for GI Joe I'm not bothering with it. Most other countries can go straight to hell as far as I'm concerned, they spend most of their time crapping on us yet when it came to our money and goods they accepted those with open arms. Screw'em. The main tema must be American or I won't see the movie. It's a global truckload of crap so I'm not taking a whiff.

Funny, they think the same about America. We certainly aren't looking too good to the rest of the world right now. I actually respect the Russians for having backbone and standing up to the U.S. Thanks to Bush, the Cold War has returned. At least it kept everything in check and no Third World countries had the balls to stand up to the Super Powers. I'm all for the second coming of the Cold War.

BountyHunterScum
01-05-2008, 11:02 PM
That's right blame bush for everything. The human race knows doom like the back of it's hand so death and destruction is not far behind. The liberals miss the glory days of drugs and free sex so they conjure up a new version of the 1969 hippie movement. Now they can indulge in the good old days they knew so many years ago. Those who blame bush for everything do not have any real ideas themselves. You're just mad gore the loud mouth piece of trash liar didn't win. Democrats are the ones who bring doom death and destruction, thanks to Clinton Sept 11 happened. We're lucky the democrat scum didn't cripple the military permanently.

decadentdave
01-05-2008, 11:28 PM
Bush has done more destruction to this country than any president in U.S. history and generations are going to pay the price for the mistakes of his presidency, mark my words. Clinton may have been getting his "bonk" blown by the intern but at least the economy was good when the dems were in office. The economy is in shambles because the Republicans only care about their war budget instead of providing health care and taking care of their own people and exploit democracy by imposing sanctions and capitalist imperialism on other countries and governments. Any way, I'm not going to turn this into a political debate. I admire the "idealist" America that the G.I. Joes stand for but it's a far cry from what Truth, Justice and the American Way are really about in this country today. If you blindly follow the banter of Patriotism without understanding how our civil liberties are being undermined, you are surrendering your rights to a quasi-fascist government. And anyone who doesn't, according to Bush and his cronies, support him and his war effort are branded as "un-American." Every political dictatorship in history has applied that reverse-psychology political rhetoric to their dictatorship.

RooJay
01-05-2008, 11:33 PM
toobad as long as these pull this diversity global crap for GI Joe I'm not bothering with it. Most other countries can go straight to hell as far as I'm concerned, they spend most of their time crapping on us yet when it came to our money and goods they accepted those with open arms. Screw'em. The main tema must be American or I won't see the movie. It's a global truckload of crap so I'm not taking a whiff.

Yipes!:eek:

RooJay
01-05-2008, 11:36 PM
Yipes!:eek:

Now let's try and not get this thread kicked down to the Rancor Pit. There's a good reason a lot of us stay out of those discussions. I come here to talk about Star Wars, toys, movies, books and T.V. not for the politics.

decadentdave
01-05-2008, 11:39 PM
Now let's try and not get this thread kicked down to the Rancor Pit. There's a good reason a lot of us stay out of those discussions. I come here to talk about Star Wars, toys, movies, books and T.V. not for the politics.

Right, uh... YO JOE!!!!! :thumbsup:

El Chuxter
01-05-2008, 11:45 PM
Isn't this a forum for discussion, not automatically attacking anyone who disagrees with you?

Point taken about Storm Shadow, by the way. I forgot he was born in the USA.

RooJay
01-05-2008, 11:49 PM
Right, uh... YO JOE!!!!! :thumbsup:

Actually, I'm a firm supporter of Cobra - we all know that Duke has done more destruction to this country than any G.I. Joe in U.S. history.

decadentdave
01-05-2008, 11:52 PM
Actually, I'm a firm supporter of Cobra - we all know that Duke has done more destruction to this country than any G.I. Joe in U.S. history.

True. Very true, but I'm with Destro. Cobra Commander is a bafoon. lol

El Chuxter
01-06-2008, 12:05 AM
You're more into the cartoons than the comics, aren't you, Dave? lol

decadentdave
01-06-2008, 12:09 AM
You're more into the cartoons than the comics, aren't you, Dave? lol

Actually, I'm more into the comics. Just read Destro Attacks tonight while taking a dump. :D

El Chuxter
01-06-2008, 12:12 AM
And you still think he's a buffoon? Dude, he totally smoked half of his own elite (including an attempt on his own son), not because they'd actually plotted against him, but because they'd worked with his impostor (some unknowingly). He totally PWNED that pantywaist Serpentor, too, proving a psychotic car salesman with a gun is mightier than a back-from-the-dead clone created from the DNA of history's greatest military leaders (and a not-quite-dead ninja) with a legion at his command.

Comic book Cobra Commander is officially the shiznit.

decadentdave
01-06-2008, 12:29 AM
Serpentor is about as gay as they come. Cobra Commander is just an oppressed suburban entrepeneure who forms the fraternal equivalency of the international KKK. Destro is a mercenary and arms dealer who has no allegiance to Cobra or its dictator. I respect a man who follows his own creed and not some megalomaniac who requires obedience and objectification.

El Chuxter
01-06-2008, 12:34 AM
Then why not Firefly instead of Destro? Destro has to please the Baroness; Firefly just lives to blow s*** up.

(Heh heh heh. Just playing devil's advocate.)

decadentdave
01-06-2008, 01:36 AM
At least Destro is getting some Baroness. :whip:

BountyHunterScum
01-06-2008, 09:35 PM
Isn't this a forum for discussion, not automatically attacking anyone who disagrees with you?

Point taken about Storm Shadow, by the way. I forgot he was born in the USA.


Hopefully that wasn't for me, I didn't attack anyone I just said in many words that I hate the rest of the world for being a bunch of greedy clueless two-faced condescending arschlochs. If it weren't for the US the world would be speaking German or Russian. The world would be under communist or nazi rule. Gratitude has many faces, the biggest one being back-stabber. The other countries need to not be the huge arschlochs they are being now or else they just might be SOL when it comes time to save them from another evil. I prefer the toys and cartoons anyway they are accurate. Making movies from toys and games is stupid. San Francisco is where SS is from, before it went mega liberal. In fact the core team are all Americans. Duke Shipwreck Gungho Scarlett Snake Eyes Lady Jaye and so on.

decadentdave
01-06-2008, 10:23 PM
Hopefully that wasn't for me, I didn't attack anyone I just said in many words that I hate the rest of the world for being a bunch of greedy clueless two-faced condescending arschlochs. If it weren't for the US the world would be speaking German or Russian. The world would be under communist or nazi rule. Gratitude has many faces, the biggest one being back-stabber. The other countries need to not be the huge arschlochs they are being now or else they just might be SOL when it comes time to save them from another evil. I prefer the toys and cartoons anyway they are accurate. Making movies from toys and games is stupid.San Francisco is where SS is from, before it went mega liberal. In fact the core team are all Americans. Duke Shipwreck Gungho Scarlett Snake Eyes Lady Jaye and so on.

Zartan has many faces ;)

Who cares what nationality the Joes are? Many of the team members have different ethnicities, speak different languages, are of varied races, colors and religions. Just because their file card doesn't say: Place of Birth: Springfield, Illinois, U.S.A. is that a reason to prejudice them from joining an international counter-terrorist team dedicated to preserving human freedom from Cobra or any other terrorist organization that threatens basic human freedoms? It's all pretty much the same, unless you're redneck bigot who thinks the U.S. of A is superior to any other nation on Earth and therefore is entitled to impose its foreign policy upon other nations that do not conform to the "democratic" persuasion.

And who's gonna save the U.S. from economic poverty when our reliance on universal imports from other countries has caused factories to close, layoffs and unemployment as well as the fall of the housing market and skyrocketing foreclosures and bankruptcies continuing to spiral out of control? If politicians would contribute a fraction of their war budget to nationalized health care, and domestically produced goods and restrict the imigration problem and focus more on their own people instead of dictating to other countries how they should run their governments and force democracy down their throats, America could be a better place to live again. We could use a modicum amount of socialism in this country. If I could speak another language, I'd leave this country before it all goes to hell. I'd probably move to Sweden.

But I digress.

BountyHunterScum
01-06-2008, 11:52 PM
I care what nationality they are so do alot of people. The Joe's core team isn't totally American so this excrement will bomb severely.

decadentdave
01-06-2008, 11:59 PM
lol And what do you define as being "American" a nation known as the cultural and ethnic "melting pot" of almost every race and nationality on the planet. By your definition, a member like Spirit Iron-Knife is "American" because he is a "Native American."

BTW - The Wayans brothers will kill this movie:

Marlon Wayans has signed on to star in Paramount actioner "G.I. Joe."
Joseph Gordon-Levitt is in negotiations to join the tentpole, which is based on the American soldier action figure created by Hasbro.

Wayans will play Ripcord, leader of the military unit.

War-themed story is set 10 years in the future. Stuart Beattie penned the screenplay, while Paul Lovett & David Elliot and Skip Woods contributed earlier drafts.

The Stephen Sommers-helmed film is set to start shooting next month in Los Angeles. Rachel Nichols, Sienna Miller, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje and Said Taghmaoui have already joined the cast.

Lorenzo di Bonaventura, who produced the Hasbro-based hit "Transformers," is producing "G.I. Joe" alongside the toy giant's Brian Goldner. Sommers and partner Bob Ducsay also will serve in a producing capacity.

Paramount will release the film on Aug. 7, 2009.

Wayans, who most recently starred in "Little Man" and "The Ladykillers," is developing a cop action spoof for Par alongside brothers Shawn and Keenen Ivory Wayans.

El Chuxter
01-07-2008, 12:09 PM
When I first read that, I thought you were joking. Then I verified it.

Wow. That's horrible. Marlon Wayans as Ripcord. Even when I was joking about Beyonce being Duke, something like that seemed too stupid to even kid about.

Ripcord? Huh? There are so many different possibilities for a field leader, why pick Ripcord? Hell, even though I think it'd still be lousy casting, at least Stalker would make more sense.

Ten years into the future? Why? I guess Snake Eyes is going to get scarred in the current Iraq war? Or, maybe he won't be scarred at all. He'll probably be English, and Ray Park will provide the voice.

Looking at pics of the other folks it said were cast, I'm failing to find any connection with any previous version of GIJoe.

I think I'm officially not giving this movie a chance anymore. I did that for Transformers and lost two hours of my life. I won't see my other favorite toyline be bastardized on the big screen in a similar way.

I'm betting that Ripcord will pee on Destro. Of course, his name will be Silverhead, since there's no reason to change it from Destro.

Droid
01-07-2008, 01:59 PM
I didn't see Transformers and I doubt I'll see this.

G.I. Joe is "a real American Hero". That is why for the most part the team should be American and certainly should be an American organization. G.I. Joe is synonomous literally with the American fighting man.

It is like how with Superman Returns Superman was no longer fighting for "the American way."

Rather than stipulating that Americans are bad why don't we try to change the world's opinion of Americans, perhaps starting with an entertaining movie about an American fighting force?

decadentdave
01-07-2008, 02:01 PM
I didn't see Transformers and I doubt I'll see this.

G.I. Joe is "a real American Hero". That is why for the most part the team should be American and certainly should be an American organization. G.I. Joe is synonomous literally with the American fighting man.

It is like how with Superman Returns Superman was no longer fighting for "the American way."

Rather than stipulating that Americans are bad why don't we try to change the world's opinion of Americans, perhaps starting with an entertaining movie about an American fighting force?

That's what they call "Republican Propaganda."

El Chuxter
01-07-2008, 02:19 PM
I'm actually leaning that way now, too. I thought we'd get new characters being from other countries, or maybe minor characters being re-envisioned to be not American.

I wasn't thinking Scarlett, Snake Eyes, Roadblock (maybe Heavy Duty; looks like they've not decided on the name), and Breaker would all be foreigners. The only American so far is Ripcord, who's played by one of the frigging Wayans brothers.

Most of all, I see that this is obviously helmed by people with no knowledge of or respect of the property, as was the case with Transformers. Anyone with sense would've cast Michael Clarke Duncan as Roadblock. The man was born to play that role.

Totally disagree with the point about Superman not fighting for the American way anymore in Superman Returns. Look at the line in the movie. There's a reason Perry says "all that stuff." It's taking what we expect to hear and changing it to something unexpected. It's called humor. It's funny. It makes one laugh. Ha ha. It's not changing the character. However, if the opening featured a voice-over that said the phrase as Perry did, that would be a different story.

RooJay
01-08-2008, 01:36 AM
True. Very true, but I'm with Destro. Cobra Commander is a bafoon. lol

Yeah, well everyone knows that Destro is the real power behind Cobra anyway. Just like everyone knows Hillary's already served two terms as President...


Jokes...these are just jokes folks...

Droid
01-08-2008, 10:56 AM
Totally disagree with the point about Superman not fighting for the American way anymore in Superman Returns. Look at the line in the movie. There's a reason Perry says "all that stuff." It's taking what we expect to hear and changing it to something unexpected. It's called humor. It's funny. It makes one laugh. Ha ha. It's not changing the character. However, if the opening featured a voice-over that said the phrase as Perry did, that would be a different story.

I think it played as a joke, but they took it out because they didn't want to offend anyone in the global markets who doesn't view America as a good thing anymore.

Though I do think Superman is Earth's hero, not America's hero, I get tired of the p.c. nonsense and the idea that "the American Way" is not a good thing anymore.

But G.I. Joe is a "real American hero." 'Nuff said.

Blue2th
01-08-2008, 11:10 AM
I think it would be ok to have a multi-national strike force team, possibly under the auspices of the U.N.
Just as long as the leader of the team is American, with the IDEALS of the U.S. as the standard.
Well, the original ideals of what good old America is supposed to be about, uncorrupted by power hungry liars, and greedy businessmen, much like the characters Cobra and Destro.

General_Grievous
01-08-2008, 02:46 PM
I wasn't thinking Scarlett, Snake Eyes, Roadblock (maybe Heavy Duty; looks like they've not decided on the name), and Breaker would all be foreigners. The only American so far is Ripcord, who's played by one of the frigging Wayans brothers.

The chick who plays Scarlett is American, and the guy who plays Roadblock is from England, and he played Mr. Eko on "Lost", in which he sported an African accent. He just might do an American accent for this.

El Chuxter
01-08-2008, 02:59 PM
The chick who plays Scarlett needs to eat a hamburger or two if she's going to convincingly play a ninja.

2-1B
01-08-2008, 06:38 PM
the guy who plays Roadblock is from England, and he played Mr. Eko on "Lost", in which he sported an African accent. He just might do an American accent for this.

No ways we doan wan none a dem limeys playin are beloved Amerricuns.

JediTricks
01-08-2008, 09:27 PM
The only American so far is Ripcord, who's played by one of the frigging Wayans brothers.And not even one of the original Wayans brothers, but one of the crappy second-stringers!

decadentdave
01-08-2008, 09:48 PM
Funny, I'm watching Major Payne right now. I guess that's all the credentials they need to fit the part. How can we take them seriously after that?

JediTricks
01-08-2008, 10:21 PM
Keenan and Damon were funny, the rest just ride their coattails.

General_Grievous
01-08-2008, 10:37 PM
And not even one of the original Wayans brothers, but one of the crappy second-stringers!
I thought they were funny up until "Scary Movie 2". That's when they started pushing it.

El Chuxter
01-08-2008, 11:24 PM
Keenan and Damon also have some dramatic acting under their belts. Not the best, mind you, but it's more than the nothing the other brothers have.

They got their fame the same way the crappy lounge singer in I'm Gonna Git You Sucka got her job singing.

RooJay
01-09-2008, 01:03 AM
The chick who plays Scarlett needs to eat a hamburger or two if she's going to convincingly play a ninja.

Yeah, I never bought into the whole Scarlett as a ninja thing myself. Originally she was just an intelligence officer who'd studied 'martial arts.' She didn't become a ninja until the ninja became the new big fad thing. after that, it was like everyone on G.I. Joe was a ninja. I always hated that there had to be so many ninjas involved in G.I. Joe. It took a lot of the cool factor away from Snake Eyes and Stormshadow if'n ya ask me.

...but yeah, she could probably use a few sandwiches regardless.

El Chuxter
01-09-2008, 01:09 AM
I preferred when there were several ninjas, but not bazillions of them. It does logically make sense for Scarlett to study the form. She was already a master of at least two other martial arts, and her boyfriend (and also the teammate whose skills most complemented her own) was a ninja. He had skills he could teach her that helped her do her job better.

I dug Firefly as a ninja, too. Something about the wackjob Vietnamese dude who loves blowing stuff up is even more insane when he's not only a ninja, but so freaking good that he actually masqueraded as a master to the Arishikage Clan and they let him teach his methods.

Zartan, well, they never could decide from day to day if he was a ninja or just a swordsmith. Either way, he was cool. Well, until the infamous orange mohawk days. He got a worse costume change than Scarlett when Ninja Force came along.

Basically, I like Storm Shadow, Snake Eyes, Scarlett, Firefly, the anonymous Red Ninjas, and a few old and/or dead ninja masters. And maybe Zartan, if he was a ninja on that day.

RooJay
01-09-2008, 01:22 AM
I preferred when there were several ninjas, but not bazillions of them. It does logically make sense for Scarlett to study the form. She was already a master of at least two other martial arts, and her boyfriend (and also the teammate whose skills most complemented her own) was a ninja. He had skills he could teach her that helped her do her job better.

Well yeah, logically. That's exactly what I did after my foundation in Wing Chun and Jiu Jitsu...was study the way of the ninja. :ninja:What else would one logically do after studying two martial arts?

Now if you'll excuse me while I melt away into this shadow over here...









:ninja:

El Chuxter
01-09-2008, 01:29 AM
Heh heh heh. You're not a military spy, though. Ninja stealth methods would be pretty handy for someone in that line of work.

I did appreciate that, before it got out of hand with little teams of ninjas in garish colored outfits, GIJoe gave us what is still the most realistic approach to ninjutsu in a major work of pop culture.

El Chuxter
01-24-2008, 02:59 PM
If the rumors are true, the kid from Third Rock (Joseph Gordon Levitt) has been cast as....

Are you sitting down? Really, I think it's a good idea.

Cobra Commander.

While I have liked Mr Levitt (or is it Mr Gordon Levitt?) in everything I've seen him in, this is so wrong that it defies belief.

Oh, and he's Duke's buddy, but has a falling out with him and that's why he founds a ruthless terrorist organization determined to rule the world. (I added the last part. For all we know, based on the info leaking out, Cobra will no longer be a terrorist group, but a reknowned dance troupe from Amsterdam.)

I officially give up on this.

Hopefully when I'm 50 and they're remaking all the movies from today, someone might do a Joe movie that doesn't suck.

Seriously, as much as I love Transformers and GIJoe, seeing what they did to Transformers and reading reliable info that suggests that Joe will be even worse, well, it hurts. I've wanted a GIJoe movie for so long, and this kind of disrespect for the property almost makes me want to cry.

decadentdave
01-24-2008, 03:12 PM
Now that does suck. This film is doomed.

plasticfetish
01-24-2008, 03:57 PM
Hopefully when I'm 50 and they're remaking all the movies from today, someone might do a Joe movie that doesn't suck.Or maybe they should just scrap the whole idea and make a movie about the G.I. Joe group that really matters... the Adventure Team (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/G.I._Joe_Adventure_Team)!!! :beard: :kung-fu grip:

decadentdave
01-24-2008, 04:06 PM
Or maybe they should just scrap the whole idea and make a movie about the G.I. Joe group that really matters... the Adventure Team (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/G.I._Joe_Adventure_Team)!!! :beard: :kung-fu grip:

Starring Ben Affleck as Super Joe. :thumbsup:

El Chuxter
01-24-2008, 04:16 PM
Man, General Colton sure got around during the 70s! :)

JediTricks
01-24-2008, 11:40 PM
WTF? The kid is a good actor, but that piece of casting is just no good.

El Chuxter
01-25-2008, 12:23 AM
I've decided that, if I sat down and purposefully wrote what was intended to be the worst GIJoe film possible, it would still be millions of times better than this movie sounds like it will be.

General_Grievous
01-25-2008, 12:37 AM
Stephen Sommers makes Michael Bay look like Orson Welles, and that's really saying something. How can you do alright with some of the cast (Scarlett, Snake Eyes), but completely screw up by casting Marlon Wayans and Joseph Gordon Levitt (who isn't a bad actor) as Cobra Commander? Levitt probably would make a good Cobra Commander....if he was 20 years older. Why couldn't they get Gary Oldman to play Cobra Commander? That could have saved this movie. And the worst news is that due to the writer's strike that just won't end, this is looking to be one of the biggest movies of '09.

El Chuxter
01-25-2008, 12:44 AM
Ten years ago, Levitt would've been a killer Billy. Now, he's too old.

Oldman would've been awesome as Cobra Commander. I think John Malkovich would be great, too. He's got an evil voice, and he definitely can be imposing, despite being a rather small guy (relative to most soldiers).

Larry David as Crystal Ball is looking better and better.

RooJay
01-25-2008, 03:32 AM
Not that I really care to get into it anymore, but what version of Cobra Commander are you folks basing these opinions on? From my experience, Cobra Commander was never anything but a whiny, high-voiced, ineffectual loser whose face was never truly revealed anyway. Why wouldn't Joseph Gordon Levitt be able to pull that off? Is the Cobra Commander all of you are familiar with somehow different than the one I grew up with.
For the record, I make no comment regarding the idea of the film version having been buddies with Duke and then going rogue - I seem to recall that having been rumored as part of a previous and presumably long abandoned script earlier in the films development (with another director attached, by the way) and I therefore place no stake in it's resent validity until I hear otherwise. I also don't think this is any great casting going on here either, but also don't see as how it's necessarily bad either.

decadentdave
01-25-2008, 03:54 AM
Duke and CC were boyhood chums? Not according to Hama's origin. If you want whiny, why not just cast Hayden Christiansen as CC? lol

"It's all Duke's fault! He's holding me back!"

decadentdave
01-25-2008, 03:56 AM
Ten years ago, Levitt would've been a killer Billy. Now, he's too old.

Oldman would've been awesome as Cobra Commander. I think John Malkovich would be great, too. He's got an evil voice, and he definitely can be imposing, despite being a rather small guy (relative to most soldiers).

Larry David as Crystal Ball is looking better and better.


I always wanted Malkovich for the Joker.

Incidentally, I work with a girl named Crystal Ball.

El Chuxter
01-25-2008, 08:23 AM
Comic book Cobra Commander was a disgruntled used car dealer, Caucasian with brown eyes and dark hair. He idolized his older brother, a bit too much. One night, his brother, who was a lush, was driving drunk, and hit the family of a serviceman coming home from Vietnam head-on, killing them. (Turned out to be Snake Eyes.) He twisted this around in his mind, and decided that Snake Eyes and the US government were somehow responsible. Then he started really mismanaging his business, and lost it after IRS troubles. He kidnapped his son and fled to another city to start Cobra, a pyramid scheme. It's sole purpose: to hire badarse assassins like Zartan and Firefly to kill the surviving soldier, who was now training in Japan. As capital grew, his idea slowly morphed into a paramilitary operation, drawing in the disillusioned, as well as the psychotic (including a spoiled European baroness and a shady Scottish arms dealer).

Comic book Cobra Commander may be an old guy, but he's still wicked. He was once shot in the back by a Crimson Guard and buried, only to not be dead and show back up about two years later to kill the impostor and everyone who'd sided with him (even unknowingly). He went toe to toe with Snake Eyes (albeit with the aid of some highly advanced armor) and kicked his butt. Best of all, he simply pulled out a pistol, shot Serpentor through the chest, and pimp-slapped him off a cliff.

Cobra Commander is not someone to be trifled with.

RooJay
01-25-2008, 09:16 AM
Comic book Cobra Commander was a disgruntled used car dealer, Caucasian with brown eyes and dark hair. He idolized his older brother, a bit too much. One night, his brother, who was a lush, was driving drunk, and hit the family of a serviceman coming home from Vietnam head-on, killing them. (Turned out to be Snake Eyes.) He twisted this around in his mind, and decided that Snake Eyes and the US government were somehow responsible. Then he started really mismanaging his business, and lost it after IRS troubles. He kidnapped his son and fled to another city to start Cobra, a pyramid scheme. It's sole purpose: to hire badarse assassins like Zartan and Firefly to kill the surviving soldier, who was now training in Japan. As capital grew, his idea slowly morphed into a paramilitary operation, drawing in the disillusioned, as well as the psychotic (including a spoiled European baroness and a shady Scottish arms dealer).

Comic book Cobra Commander may be an old guy, but he's still wicked. He was once shot in the back by a Crimson Guard and buried, only to not be dead and show back up about two years later to kill the impostor and everyone who'd sided with him (even unknowingly). He went toe to toe with Snake Eyes (albeit with the aid of some highly advanced armor) and kicked his butt. Best of all, he simply pulled out a pistol, shot Serpentor through the chest, and pimp-slapped him off a cliff.

Cobra Commander is not someone to be trifled with.

Point me in his direction - I'd like to trifle. I've got a thing against disgruntled used car salesmen with brother issues.:whip:

Tycho
02-12-2008, 04:46 AM
And knowing is half the battle!

At the end of this movie, I want the cast to do clips of safety tips such as "don't go sky diving without a parachute," and "it can hurt if you light yourself on fire," etc. - "and knowing is half the battle."


They can use special effects to make them that funny - such as showing the body drop out of the airplane.

Perhaps they should do this during the closing credits as a tribute to the cartoon, but that'd be great, wouldn't it?

RooJay
02-12-2008, 08:36 AM
And knowing is half the battle!

At the end of this movie, I want the cast to do clips of safety tips such as "don't go sky diving without a parachute," and "it can hurt if you light yourself on fire," etc. - "and knowing is half the battle."


They can use special effects to make them that funny - such as showing the body drop out of the airplane.

Perhaps they should do this during the closing credits as a tribute to the cartoon, but that'd be great, wouldn't it?

That'd make it worth the price of admission right there!:thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup:

decadentdave
02-12-2008, 12:32 PM
With the Wayans on board, they might as well turn it into a comedy like Starsky & Hutch. Is Ben Stiller Flint and Owen Wilson Rock N' Roll?

El Chuxter
02-12-2008, 12:36 PM
First review of the GIJOE Movie!!


A representative of Hasbro, who was, in a sense, "born again" three years ago in 2005, was allowed to see early footage of the upcoming GIJoe film over the weekend.

In response, the Hasbro reviewer blasted Joseph Gordon Levitt into a mound of fine ash, then crushed his Cobra Commander mask under his foot. This prompted Marlon Wayans to ask, "What'd he say his name was again?"

The Hasbro representative only stated, "Real American Hero, Bonaventura? This is bad comedy."

General_Grievous
02-12-2008, 03:01 PM
So I checked G.I. Joe's status on imdb today in the hopes of maybe seeing that at least they would change their mind about Cobra Commander's casting. Nothing on that front. I saw that some dude named David Murray is rumored to play Destro. Don't know who that is? Neither did I. But I checked his profile and saw that he was the "Jumpy Thug" in "Batman Begins". You know, the guy who panicked and screamed "WHERE ARE YOU?" and Batman, in all his badassery, just goes, "Here." Man, that was a good movie. Which is probably the exact opposite of what this will turn out to be, but I digest. My point is that if they got some no-name to play Destro when they could have easily afforded someone like Gerard Butler from "300" (who is Scottish, and would have made a great Destro, but that makes too much sense), I'm thinking they're blowing the budget on booze.

El Chuxter
02-12-2008, 03:12 PM
Since the movie will suck so bad, how about our own casting choices?

Cobra Commander: John Malkovich. He has the creepy quality of voice and the evil eyes, which would be almost all that's necessary. And he's a damned fine actor and awesome bad guy.

Destro: Raph Fienes. Who better to play James than Voldemort himself? He may not be Scottish (is he?), but he's close enough. And frigging evil. Imagine Fienes with a form-fitting metal mask firing off some wrist rockets.

Baroness: Angelina Jolie. I've said that before. I'm not a huge fan, but she definitely has the look down. And she can play pretty hardcore characters, too. (I just hope that the Baroness is as bloodthirsty in the movie as in the comic, so they get one thing right.)

Roadblock: Michael Clarke Duncan. He was born to play that role. 'Nuff said.

Snake Eyes: I'm happy with Ray Park, so long as he doesn't speak or show his face.

Soft Master: Larry Hama. Not a great actor, but he is Japanese and around the right age. Since he should be nothing more than a minor character in a flashback and wouldn't require a great amount of acting, this would be a great homage.

Crystal Ball: Stephen King. Another subtle homage to the original series. Crystal Ball should never be more than a background cameo, though.

Wild Bill: Jeff Foxworthy. While normally I loathe Foxworthy, he'd be perfect as Wild Bill. He's the only character who should be played for comedy.

Tomax and Xamot: Christian Bale (duplicated using CG). He's got the unassuming good looks that these two should have, and can play some hardcore parts, too. The battle armor should be completely eliminated; put these guys in suits and make them Cobra's legitimate front.

Let's keep it going.

2-1B
02-12-2008, 08:30 PM
Baroness: Jessica Alba

Scarlett: Kirsten Dunst

Snow Job: Ryan Reynolds (with Smokin Aces beard)

Nerdy Computer Whiz: Tobey Maguire

RooJay
02-13-2008, 01:02 AM
A couple of thoughts:

- Christopher Eccleston has replaced David Murray as Destro as of yesterday:

http://www.mania.com/57405.html
http://blog.newsarama.com/2008/02/12/murray-out-eccleston-in-as-destro/
http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/hr/content_display/news/e3if2a7312d15f5f54f9704b5d1aebee1d4

...not a bad choice in my opinion, though I agree with the idea that Gerard Butler would've been perfect for the part!

- I for one don't put much stake in this supposed Hasbro reps' 'review' of early footage; all indications are that this movie hasn't been filming for more than a couple of days. Even if there were enough footage for him to have seen by now, I doubt there would be enough for anyone to make much of an informed decision.

- I'm getting less and less confident, personally, with this film daily. Though I still remain hopeful. Wayanses aside.

- As iffy as some of this productions casting choices have seemed, I'm happy they're the one's calling the shots and not you fine folks. Your casting choices, for the large part, totally suck balls. C'mon?! Angelina Jolie as Baroness? YARGG! Jessica Alba (regardless of whether or not anyone here is dying to see her in skintight leather) is an even worse idea. Matter of fact, Caesar - I'm just gonna pretend I didn't even see your post down there. Everyone knows the role of the Baroness should have gone to Kate Beckinsale (who very nearly played that part anyway in the Underworld flicks.) Speaking of Underworld, the dude who played Raze, Kevin Grevioux, was born for the role! Ralph Fiennes is sinister enough (and a great actor) but is far from imposing enough to play Destro (now that I mention it, neither is Eccleston! Oops!) The Crimson Twins, Tomax and Xamot should and could only be played by Vincent Cassel (look him up.)

El Chuxter
02-13-2008, 01:17 PM
Beckinsale is way too skinny to be Anastasia.

Like I said, I'm not a huge fan of Jolie, but she definitely has the look. Dye her hair black, put some glasses on her, and she's a dead ringer. And we know she can act. Unlike Ms Beckinsale.

Destro and Cobra Commander are both fearsome due to their characters--brilliant, self-absorbed, and amoral (though Destro combines this all with a sense of honor). Neither needs to be physically imposing.

Tycho
02-13-2008, 01:33 PM
If you jump out of the window of a tall building and land on your head, you will break your neck.

And knowing is half the battle.

General_Grievous
02-13-2008, 02:11 PM
Gary Oldman for Cobra Commander.

El Chuxter
02-13-2008, 02:16 PM
Okay, I looked up Cassel. I don't see him as the Crimson Twins. He isn't handsome enough. Bale has the looks, and he could also play the unassuming spoiled playboy with a dark side (hell, he already has a few times).

And can you honestly argue against Duncan as Roadblock? "A .50 cal. Browning weighs 84 pounds. Add fifty pounds for the ammo--that's about 134 pounds of steel generating 2930 f.p.s. in muzzle velocity at a cyclic rate of 550 r.pm. Anybody who can handle that doesn't need a machine gun to keep me away!"

Tycho
02-13-2008, 07:50 PM
If you light yourself on fire, you'll burn.

That will hurt.

And knowing is half the battle!

RooJay
02-14-2008, 12:18 AM
Beckinsale is way too skinny to be Anastasia.

Like I said, I'm not a huge fan of Jolie, but she definitely has the look. Dye her hair black, put some glasses on her, and she's a dead ringer. And we know she can act. Unlike Ms Beckinsale.

Destro and Cobra Commander are both fearsome due to their characters--brilliant, self-absorbed, and amoral (though Destro combines this all with a sense of honor). Neither needs to be physically imposing.

On a first name basis, are we?:p

Anyway, I presume that since you're not a very big fan you've just never looked closely enough:

(Also, you seem to presume that acting ability is going to be required for this thing.)

RooJay
02-14-2008, 12:29 AM
Okay, I looked up Cassel. I don't see him as the Crimson Twins. He isn't handsome enough. Bale has the looks, and he could also play the unassuming spoiled playboy with a dark side (hell, he already has a few times).

And can you honestly argue against Duncan as Roadblock? "A .50 cal. Browning weighs 84 pounds. Add fifty pounds for the ammo--that's about 134 pounds of steel generating 2930 f.p.s. in muzzle velocity at a cyclic rate of 550 r.pm. Anybody who can handle that doesn't need a machine gun to keep me away!"

Personally, I never thought they Crimson Twins were all that pretty. Maybe they're just not my type. I can say one thing for Cassel as Tomax and Xamot though that Bale ain't got, and that's that he's a whole lot more Euro-Trash!

I agree that I can't really argue against Duncan, it's just that I feel I can make a much better argument for Grevioux (after all, he's only two inches shorter and a whole lot less...fatter.)

JediTricks
02-14-2008, 12:55 AM
Kate Beckinsale in skin-tight black pleather has already been done to death in Underworld, where she proved she can't act in skin-tight black pleather. Oh, but this would be different because she'd be in glasses.

I'd pick her over Jolie, but neither seem quite right to me.

Tycho
02-14-2008, 03:52 AM
If you keep staring at Kate Beckinsale and Angelina Jolie like you've been doing, there's a good chance you're going to go blind.

And knowing is half the battle!

El Chuxter
02-14-2008, 09:22 AM
No, Beckinsale would be completely hidden by Jolie.

I'm not saying Angelina Jolie is fat. But I certainly ain't saying a hamburger wouldn't double Kate Bulimicsale's weight.

decadentdave
02-14-2008, 11:31 AM
I'll take Jolie for Baroness. She'd look really sexy with those glasses. Plus she can do a German accent. Much better choice than Sienna Miller whom I can't stand.

Jedi_Master_Guyute
03-21-2008, 07:05 AM
Two promo pics of Ray Park as Snake Eyes.

Start your complaining...........NOW! :thumbsup:

El Chuxter
03-21-2008, 08:28 AM
What's to complain about? There's absolutely nothing wrong with Snake Eyes in either pic. Sure, the Arashikage emblem is on the outside of the uniform, but not a big deal. I'd say pretty damned close to perfect.

I should mention that, following the interview with a certain former star of MASH a couple of weeks ago, I'm looking forward to this movie again. I just didn't see any need in mentioning that yet. The movie could still suck, but to have involvement by and the blessing of the creator is a pretty strong indication that the spirit (if not the details) will be faithful to the original, or at least they're trying harder than Michael Bay. (I don't recall Bob Budiansky having any involvement whatsoever in Transformers.)

JediTricks
03-22-2008, 03:20 PM
Heh heh, "star of MASH".

I'm not down with the muscle-suit-iness of it. The look overall is good, but there are almost NO figures of Snake-Eyes that have any muscle definition to them at all, not even the latest 25th anniversary versions. That was a bad movie choice as it takes away from the military ninja feel of the character, it's unnecessary, you write the part correctly and he'll come through no matter what.

At Wizard World last week, my friend and I were talking with Ray Park briefly (he and Daniel Logan were there signing, but I'm not an autograph guy) and someone walks by and asks him like it's a big secret if it's going to be Snake-Eyes in the Joe movie, his response was so coolly matter-of-fact positive that it was a little surprising and funny.

RooJay
03-23-2008, 12:43 AM
Say what you will about the prequels or even about this G.I. Joe movie, but you've gotta admit that Ray Park is one cool dude.

2-1B
03-23-2008, 03:23 PM
He really is. :thumbsup: Seeing those Snake Eyes pics gave me a stealth ninja boner. :beard:

Tycho
03-23-2008, 08:15 PM
I think Ray Park looks cool as Snake-Eyes.

What's not cool is El Chuxter bashing Michael Bay again! Totally uncalled for. He has nothing to do with the GI Joe movie.

Because of his lack of involvement, we already know that this movie won't feature all of his cinematographic inventions:

golden shower scene
masturbation joke
slow motion dive-n-fire
shaky cam
etc.

But there may be a tribute scene to Michael Bay when Zartan tries to overcome his shyness and asks if Baroness wants to go out with him to 7-eleven for a Slurpee. That would be such a good scene!

figrin bran
03-24-2008, 01:08 AM
Oddly enough, I think that a Michael Bay GI Joe film would be better than his TF movie. If you take the robots out of the film and only consider the scenes with Sgt. Lennox (I believe that was his name) and replace the Decepticons with terrorists, that might make a barely mediocre GI Joe movie.

El Chuxter
03-24-2008, 02:43 AM
I'd shudder to think of the "touching" scenes of Snake Eyes and his dad, buying his first AWE Striker.

JetsAndHeels
03-24-2008, 10:51 AM
Two promo pics of Ray Park as Snake Eyes.

Start your complaining...........NOW! :thumbsup:

I am not complaining one bit, I think those pics are great!! Thanks for posting them.

preacher
03-24-2008, 11:46 AM
Oh man that looks cool! That second picture is almost an exact duplicate of one of the pictures of snake eyes that was on the back of one of the GI JOE reloaded comics. I remember when I first saw the picture on that comic I thought how cool a live action movie would be if snake eyes were exactly like that picture.

Very curious to see what Destro and Cobra Commander are gonna look like now. I would bet that the cobra attire isn't going to blue anymore but like a bluish grey color instead. And I seriously doubt Destro is going to have his chest exposed in Conan fashion with that funky red collar of his. I'm betting he'll have a black suit and red button shirt underneath and that medalion chained around his neck instead of a tie.

But so far so good.

Jedi_Master_Guyute
04-16-2008, 09:39 PM
Promo pic of Scarlett. :thumbsup:

DarthQuack
04-16-2008, 09:41 PM
Delicious....:love:

El Chuxter
04-16-2008, 11:43 PM
Varah naaaaaaaahce! Ha fahve!
I'm loving the update. As much as I like the "classic" look, I'll be first to say that a ninja-trained intelligence agent looks pretty retarded in bright yellow leotards.

I am very glad to see they gave her the crossbow. Everything I'm seeing about this movie lately is erasing any doubts I had a few months ago. :thumbsup:

Can't wait to see who's next to be revealed! If they show Anastasia next, I don't know if my ticker will be able to contain itself in light of the barrage of hotness. :love:

RooJay
04-17-2008, 12:21 AM
Hey, movie Scarlet would make a great Baroness! A little black hair dye (something the actual movie Baroness seems to be oddly lacking) some wire-rimmed glasses, a Cobra logo and the chest - they should totally cast movie Scarlet as movie Baroness!

Still...pretty cool!

El Chuxter
04-17-2008, 12:24 AM
Actually, whatsherface said that she wears a black wig to play Baroness. I'm not sure how the "blonde woman at a military funeral in Arlington Cemetary" plays into it; I think it's a safe bet she's not a spoiled Euro-trash girl who turned to terrorism after wrongly blaming a secretive soldier for killing her humanitarian brother in 'Nam.

figrin bran
04-18-2008, 10:09 PM
I take it that no one else saw the photos that surfaced of the rest of the cast? Apparently, they've since been removed by Paramount's request but I did see them this morning. Let's just say that I have a really bad feeling about this film now...quite the same feeling I had when I first saw the Movie Transformer designs.

Baroness looks okay, sort of like Scarlett but Storm Shadow was unmasked and it looked like he was wearing a Miami Vice style white suit and white loafers. I don't know about all of you but I want to see SS, not Tommy Arishakage (sp?). The rest of the Joes, well you do see them, you'll probably be doing a double take and wondering if you're not seeing Movie X-Men pics. I take it that they'll all be Black Ops as none were in traditional military garb.

Maradona
04-19-2008, 12:00 AM
I saw the pics earlier and was also disappointed. Obviously, in a film version, none of the Joes were going to be walking around with big number 14s on their chests (sorry Bazooka purists), but Storm Shadow in Wedding Ceremony Attire was not on my list of most anticipated figures. I expect there will be footsge at SDCC. Hopefully that will calm fears instead of fuel them.

El Chuxter
04-19-2008, 12:24 PM
I didn't see the pics before they were taken down, but did Stormy look anything like this (http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/b/bb/Reloaded10.jpg)?

Paramount didn't make it up, if that's the case. And it's a myth that ninjas run around in their PJ's. Honestly, you could see fifteen ninjas at the mall and not know they were ninjas. (Unless, of course, they were wailing on guitar and killing people for dropping spoons.) The reason the Joe ninjas always were dressed like that is because a guy in a traditional ninja suit would sell better than a guy in a suit.

And, uh, not that I'm seeing it a lot here, but why is everyone mad they're wearing all black? The original team wore all green. No one complains about that, even though it means we never got Flash or Short Fuse in cooler costumes.

mabudonicus
04-19-2008, 12:43 PM
Chux, the original team all wore green save one... hmmm well, the one guy who wore something different was inprinted on SO many minds as the Bad-Arse actually wore black making him stand out like no other

If they'd all been in black he woulda looked a lot less impressive

Screw black leather replacing every iconic outfit ever is all's I was on about elsewhere :D

And how long did hasbro keep the all-green scheme??

I rest my case
:bored: Iso&Baws
I am at least 75% serious in the above

El Chuxter
04-19-2008, 01:32 PM
Two, actually. Scarlett wore yellow.

Zap wore a lighter green, and Stalker wore camo, but both are still technically green.

That lasted one year.

mabudonicus
04-19-2008, 02:04 PM
exactly, see, that's my main gripe here, I bet the most boring characters weren't the most popular ones, Hasbro figured (NO pun intended) that it'd be better if they were laregely unique and they were right

I am quite familiar with the comic and know the uniforms were often just that, uniform, but seriously I didn't think much of the line (other than Snake Eyes) til the real variety started kickin in, the second "line" was full of must-haves

There are enough real-life movies featuring real soldiers (or realistic at the very least) and so as far as I'm concerned GI Joe HAS to be something more than a navy seals/private ryan film...
Heck if you want it to be "realistic" why not go for the REAL story, a 6 hour courtroom snorefest as Cobra Commander defends himself from the IRS in court over all the secret terrordrome purchases with undeclared income, then everyone in the film COULD wear a suit and tie and it'd suck out loud
:bored: Iso&Baws
I am serious about all that

El Chuxter
04-19-2008, 03:20 PM
Yeah, I can see where you're coming from. As a kid, I liked Snake Eyes, Stalker, and Scarlett, 'cause they were different; Hawk, 'cause he was the leader; and Clutch and Steeler, because they came with cool rides. I dug Flash, too, though I never had him, but that was probably because of the red chestpad thingy he wore. (What was the deal with that?)

I think that, eventually, all the original characters were re-released in updated costumes except for Short-Fuse, Grand Slam, and Flash.

Funny, I actually like the "original team" more as an adult than I did as a kid. Especially Short Fuse and Zap, who I had as a kid, but never really cared much about.

I'm willing to overlook some leeway with the costumes. X-Men did the same thing, and it was hardly a bad movie. There was a lot of concern about their black leather outfits before it came out, as I recall. (And the things that bugged me about Transformers had nothing to do with changing the alt-modes and painting flames on them.)

I have this feeling that Storm Shadow may be "low key" until an action sequence; then we'll see him in all his glory.

JediTricks
04-19-2008, 05:08 PM
The '82 figures were all fairly boring (even Snake Eyes, sorry, but you know it's true, that is a boring figure (http://www.yojoe.com/action/82/snakeeyes.shtml), it's the exact same body as every other character except for the legs, and comes with the not-very-interesting accessories of an uzi and a purse "explosives pack" - the only saving grace of that figure was its bio from the filecard), as were the very boring vehicles that year. It took about 2 years for the line to really find its legs, and what distinguished it from all the other military stuff was the colorful characters with unique looks and weaponry and vehicles and equipment.

figrin bran
04-19-2008, 05:22 PM
I didn't see the pics before they were taken down, but did Stormy look anything like this (http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/b/bb/Reloaded10.jpg)?

Paramount didn't make it up, if that's the case. And it's a myth that ninjas run around in their PJ's. Honestly, you could see fifteen ninjas at the mall and not know they were ninjas. (Unless, of course, they were wailing on guitar and killing people for dropping spoons.) The reason the Joe ninjas always were dressed like that is because a guy in a traditional ninja suit would sell better than a guy in a suit.

And, uh, not that I'm seeing it a lot here, but why is everyone mad they're wearing all black? The original team wore all green. No one complains about that, even though it means we never got Flash or Short Fuse in cooler costumes.

Yes, SS did indeed look like that. Thanks for clarifying that Paramount didn't make it up but I'm sure how you can see that those of us less versed in the GI Joe verse might think that was a Matrix sort of look.

For me, it isn't even so much as the black costumes but rather, how similar looking they are. From what I recall of the pics, Ripcord's costume looked the same as Duke's.

El Chuxter
04-19-2008, 05:24 PM
Funny you mention that, JT. Snake Eyes was another one I wasn't excited about as a little kid. It wasn't until I got into the comic two or three years later that I found him interesting. And the pack-in wolf with the second version didn't hurt, either. I was a sucker for animals with my Joes, even if I only had Timber and Freedom.

I'm not trying to sound like a know-it-all regarding Storm Shadow, but I'm still betting anything it's a "combination" of sorts, with him wearing that suit until some sort of major action sequence.

JediTricks
04-19-2008, 06:16 PM
Snake Eyes is the easiest one to prove the point with, he's in the original '82 lineup, and he's one of the most well-known characters from the show and comics, yet that figure is a massive snore when you really think about it. My point was that I think for the mass audience who remembers GI Joe: ARAH, the distinctive looks of the characters' costumes are going to be what they associate most closely with the main characters, so for them to go more "realistic" and "modern special ops" with this makes little sense, it genericizes the project. And after the reaction they got out of showing Snake Eyes, for Storm Shadow not to also look ninja-esque is pretty wasteful.

El Chuxter
04-19-2008, 06:19 PM
If it stays faithful to every incarnation, though, Snake Eyes has a need to keep his face covered, whereas Storm Shadow does not.

Beast
05-07-2008, 05:15 PM
They released a bunch of new teaser images today for the movie.

From TNI:

G.I.Joe Movie: Storm Shadow, Destro & More Revealed
by Jay in GI Joe at 06:49 PM on 2008.05.07

New images revealing what Destro, Storm Shadow, Breaker and Heavy Duty will look like in the upcoming live-action G.I.Joe Movie. Paramount has decided to spread out the release of the images all over the net so head over to our FORUMS where our board members have kindly put together links to each image. Once you check them out then be sure to check out what your fellow G.I.Joe fans think of them and feel free to share your own thoughts.

The cast for G.I.Joe includes Ray Parks (Snake-Eyes), Sienna Miller (Baroness) and Rachel Nichols (Scarlett), Said Taghmaoui (Breaker), Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (Heavy Duty), Marlon Waynes (Ripcord), Channing Tatum (Duke) and Dennis Quaid (Hawk), Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Cobra Commander), Arnold Vosloo (Zartan) and Karolína Isela Kurková (Cover Girl).

Lorenzo di Bonaventura and Hasbro's Brian Goldner will produce a G.I. Joe live-action movie scheduled for release in August 7, 2009. Joining the production team along with newly-named director, Stephen Sommers, and business-partner Bob Ducsay will be scribe Stuart Beattie.
Destro:
http://www.iesb.net/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=4833&Itemid=99

Storm Shadow:
http://www.latinoreview.com/news/holy-s-it-storm-shadow-looks-totally-badass-4591

Breaker:
http://www.darkhorizons.com/news08/080507o.php

Heavy Duty:
http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=44754

The Baroness:
http://movies.ign.com/articles/872/872167p1.html

General Hawk:
http://www.collider.com/entertainment/news/article.asp/aid/7803/tcid/1

mabudonicus
05-07-2008, 06:15 PM
OYES this movie already sucks rocks, the image of "destro" is idiotic- I'm sure there's tons of nerds who think that the subject matter was somehow totally hard-edge and realistic, and they'll be quite pleased at how much this monochromatic, joyless-looking piece of crap sucks lifeless arse, but seriously, I am gona pronouce the same thing I pronounced before that (some say ir's great) suck-festival called the Hulk came out

You can call it as brilliant as you like, and accuse the audience-in-general of not "getting" it but when it sucks MAJOR rocks in REAL LIFE and fails at the box office PLEASE don't think it was something no-one else "got", it's gonna be a piece of crap based (REAL loosely, hell, most of these "characters" were a single paragraph "deep", if they weren't soleley and cheaply defined by a friggin accessory) on seriously goofy one-note shards of artificial "gravitas"

I bet this movie will suck apes AND lions simultaneously

I can't WAIT to see how AWESOME folks think this obviously uhh "alternative culture" black leather COP OUT is, since anything with ANY colour in it is SO..... SOOO... well so before EVERYTHING HAD TO BE DAAAAAAARK AND SUCK ROCKS
:beard: Iso&Baws
I hope to hell this movie sucks at LEAST hard enough so as to be entertaining. The "original" Gi Joe was actually fun and had colours AND unusual costumes, since it was made before that stuff was considered lame

Maradona
05-07-2008, 09:19 PM
I like that I'm disappointed in these pictures. This dramatically lowers expectations for me, which were low to begin with. Now, when I do see it, it will not be as bad if I were going in completely spoiler free. Additionally, these pics represent the money that will stay in my pocket when the toys come out next year.

RooJay
05-08-2008, 03:02 AM
(REAL loosely, hell, most of these "characters" were a single paragraph "deep", if they weren't soleley and cheaply defined by a friggin accessory) on seriously goofy one-note shards of artificial "gravitas"

In general, I agree with your sentiments for the most part. This movie more than likely is going to suck it hard. Not that I'm not willing to give them the benefit of the doubt - I will wait until I see it before I make any serious, definitive determinations, and I'm still hoping to be pleasantly surprised, but I'm not really seeing a lot here that instills any kind of confidence. However, judging by that comment above I'm left with the impression that you are not a fan anyway, which in turn makes me wonder why you even bother commenting here. Not that you're not welcome or shouldn't be allowed to voice your opinions, just that since it doesn't seem like you'd be someone who has any interest in anything G.I. Joe I don't understand why you'd bother much less why you'd ever get as disgusted as you sound there. There are plenty of things I don't care for, many of them are frequently being discussed in the forums as I type this, but I personally have never felt the need to chime in and voice how little I care for them.

As far as those pics go - I don't know...looking at them, if I didn't already know I'd think they could been from any cut-rate, direct-to-DVD action flick that might come around nowadays. It's really a shame that the folks in charge of this project don't seem interested in utilizing anything remotely resembling the original designs that made those characters so cool to begin with. I find them literally unrecognizable as G.I. Joe. The only two that are on the mark as far as costume designs are The Baroness and Snake-Eyes - too bad they decided to put the entire rest of the cast in the exact same costume as those two!

mabudonicus
05-08-2008, 09:07 AM
Ahh RooJay, there is much you do not understand about me :D

I like a great many things, GI Joe is definitely 3 of them (the figures, show and comics are 3 pretty much completely different things, with the figured having more in common with both the show and the comic than either do with each other)

What I do NOT like is how something that I KNOW the be pretty much light and goofy (talking the show here too, the type of "funny" used in the GI Joe universe didn't play so well on the printed page- anyone here laugh their arse off at Breakers "bubble gum ruse" in Cenrtral Park?? Tho the team was in hysterics, I didn't even chuckle) should somehow "mature" along with the fans.

This phenomenon has ruined several of my favourite properties over the past few years (maybe the least objectionable example I can use is the Mod Squad movie, tho the Fugitive was just as offensive in my book) and for some reason it still seems to be the "way to do things" which sucks. If you want something dark, serious and realistic why the HELL would you pick a cartoon about a half-man half-snake who hangs out with a scottish guy in a silver mask (who speaks like a huge black dude ) and fights against a strange gang of military specialists with ridiculous codenames??? Seriously, GI Joe was NOT realistic nor serious (for the most part- the comic tried and in a lot of cases succeeded at having a bit more weight than the show, but you STILL always got the "hey I'm a new figure that's coming out soon" cameos in pretty much every issue)

The way I see it is thusly- the movie will have NOTHING to do with the old show- some folks will think this is a god thing and will enjoy the new, "real" GI Joe. a LOT of folks will either think it IS about that silly cartoon and ignore it OR will likely feel much like myself and not bother seeing it cos anyone who thinks people should take the whole GI Joe thing "seriously" is frankly stupid IMO.

IF somehow this pice of carp DOES lure in "new" fans what good will it be, they buy a box-set of episodes of the original and find it's NOT a bunch of really cool grim dudes dressed in black fighting a bunch of truly wicked "terrorists" dressed in business suits- it's a brightly coloured, TOTALLY light and silly program about a team of pretty much costumed superheroes fighting an hilarious snake-man who is trying REAL unsuccessfully (but still pretty much once a day) to take over the world for whatever reason. So WHY bother making something so totally distanced from the source material?? There really is no good reason I can think of personally.

damn all this talk about GI Joe makes me wanna go in the basement to get some of my despised comics and hate the crap outta Silent Interlude

:beard: Iso&Baws

LOL Elf just said (and she wasn't as much of a fan but remembers the figures with their individualities and sweet accessories) "the pics you showed me don't look much like what I remember- why couldn't they like throw a hat one one of 'em or somethin??" KILLER

HAHAHA then she said "Well, I bet Sgt Slaughter is all black, probably doesn't have a moustache of sunglasses- probably DOESN't have a hat on" LMAO

BanthaPoodoo
05-08-2008, 02:08 PM
It's amazing how pretty much none of the characters look like the GI Joe counterpart, save Baroness.

Where is the chrome dome of Destro? Why is Storm Shadow so weak looking, he's much more muscular than that & why did they use the original 1st issue costume? So much better looking in the white & grey outfit.

Heavy Duty didn't wear all black & sure as heck never had sleeves that I can recall.

I had so much hope for this movie as growing up in the 80's I had & still have almost every GI Joe toy ever made. They really have started this franchise off on a bad start. I don't even know if I want to go see it now or not...

El Chuxter
05-08-2008, 02:33 PM
You actually remember Heavy Duty? In the original line, he didn't show up until 1991, and was a pretty forgettable character. In the new series, he's been a sort of surrogate Roadblock up until recently, when (I guess) Hasbro regained the rights to the name Roadblock.

Storm Shadow not using the grey outfit is more accurate than many of the other costume choices. The white one was the only one he wore during his stint in Cobra.

I'm willing to give the costumes the benefit of the doubt, for two reasons: first, it makes sense for them to wear uniforms rather than all sorts of random costumes, and, two, it's been confirmed that (aside from Snake Eyes) these aren't the only uniforms they wear.

The only thing that concerns me is Destro not wearing a mask. Even as silly as it would be for a businessman to wear a crazy mask, it was part of the character--he would never sully (in his mind) the memory of his ancestors by removing the mask. (Except for the Baroness.)

Beast
05-08-2008, 02:53 PM
Perhaps they're simply changing it so that Destro adopts the mask later in the film, after having been wounded or burned. I could certainly live with that, since pretty much all movies based on comics, etc. have to be altered to play to a wider audience. Yes, it would rock if they could do a straight adaption. But I still have hope for the film. And there's still the old toon and comics for the old school fans.

El Chuxter
05-08-2008, 03:27 PM
The reason I'm antsy about it is changing his reason for wearing the mask means a serious change to the character altogether. It eliminates, or seriously reduces, his eccentricity if the mask isn't an hereditary emblem. Anyone can wear a mask to hide severe scarring. (In fact, probably 99% of bad guys do.) It takes a really screwy fellow to wear one all the time simply because his father wore one, and his father wore one, back to the guy hundreds of years ago who was forced to wear one and changed it from a mark of shame to a mark of pride.

That's one of the things that makes Destro an interesting villain, even more interesting than Cobra Commander. The movie really could hinge on how true the spirit of Destro is to the Destro who's been established for decades.

The mask could even not be an hereditary mark, but he almost has to wear it all the time for seemingly no reason. Hiding a scar is changing the character at a more fundamental level.

To put it another way: it's a change to the details if Bruce Wayne falls into a pit full of bats while playing with Rachel Dawes, and this is what inspires him to become Batman (rather than seeing a bat fly through his window one night). But it's still true to the spirit of Batman. If, however, he decides to become Batman because he's a big Barry Bonds fan, that's a change that does undermine the spirit of what Batman is, and would've hurt the movie.

Maradona
05-08-2008, 05:41 PM
From what I have read, this film is an origin film where the goal is to establish the characters for anyone who walks in off the street having absolutely no prior knowledge of the characters. In it, and I suppose a minor *spoiler* warning should apply, the audience sees how Cobra Commander becomes Cobra Commander and how Destro, the film's major antagonist, dons the mask. The Joe team will most likely be in several costumes throughout the film. The more costume changes they have, the more toys Hasbro believes they will be able to sell.

mabudonicus
05-08-2008, 10:42 PM
pretty much all movies based on comics, etc. have to be altered to play to a wider audience.
and THAT is why they FAIL

I'm being serious here, how many die-hard fans really cared about WHY Destro wore a mask?? He just DID, and the whole "Character" was a dude in a silver mask who tried to help man-snake take over the world for a price
:beard: Iso&Baws

Seriously if the original is too out-of-date in ones mind DON'T BOTHER, just come up with your own idea

El Chuxter
05-08-2008, 11:25 PM
He just DID, and the whole "Character" was a dude in a silver mask who tried to help man-snake take over the world for a price

No, the whole "Character" was a dude in a silver mask who tried to help an insane former used car salesman take over the world for a price. ;)

RooJay
05-09-2008, 05:11 AM
Ahh RooJay, there is much you do not understand about me :D

I like a great many things, GI Joe is definitely 3 of them (the figures, show and comics are 3 pretty much completely different things, with the figured having more in common with both the show and the comic than either do with each other)

What I do NOT like is how something that I KNOW the be pretty much light and goofy (talking the show here too, the type of "funny" used in the GI Joe universe didn't play so well on the printed page- anyone here laugh their arse off at Breakers "bubble gum ruse" in Cenrtral Park?? Tho the team was in hysterics, I didn't even chuckle) should somehow "mature" along with the fans.

This phenomenon has ruined several of my favourite properties over the past few years (maybe the least objectionable example I can use is the Mod Squad movie, tho the Fugitive was just as offensive in my book) and for some reason it still seems to be the "way to do things" which sucks. If you want something dark, serious and realistic why the HELL would you pick a cartoon about a half-man half-snake who hangs out with a scottish guy in a silver mask (who speaks like a huge black dude ) and fights against a strange gang of military specialists with ridiculous codenames??? Seriously, GI Joe was NOT realistic nor serious (for the most part- the comic tried and in a lot of cases succeeded at having a bit more weight than the show, but you STILL always got the "hey I'm a new figure that's coming out soon" cameos in pretty much every issue)

The way I see it is thusly- the movie will have NOTHING to do with the old show- some folks will think this is a god thing and will enjoy the new, "real" GI Joe. a LOT of folks will either think it IS about that silly cartoon and ignore it OR will likely feel much like myself and not bother seeing it cos anyone who thinks people should take the whole GI Joe thing "seriously" is frankly stupid IMO.

IF somehow this pice of carp DOES lure in "new" fans what good will it be, they buy a box-set of episodes of the original and find it's NOT a bunch of really cool grim dudes dressed in black fighting a bunch of truly wicked "terrorists" dressed in business suits- it's a brightly coloured, TOTALLY light and silly program about a team of pretty much costumed superheroes fighting an hilarious snake-man who is trying REAL unsuccessfully (but still pretty much once a day) to take over the world for whatever reason. So WHY bother making something so totally distanced from the source material?? There really is no good reason I can think of personally.

damn all this talk about GI Joe makes me wanna go in the basement to get some of my despised comics and hate the crap outta Silent Interlude

:beard: Iso&Baws

LOL Elf just said (and she wasn't as much of a fan but remembers the figures with their individualities and sweet accessories) "the pics you showed me don't look much like what I remember- why couldn't they like throw a hat one one of 'em or somethin??" KILLER

HAHAHA then she said "Well, I bet Sgt Slaughter is all black, probably doesn't have a moustache of sunglasses- probably DOESN't have a hat on" LMAO

So now I know, and that as they say is half the battle! I certainly understand where you're coming from, now. As for myself personally, I suppose I'm much more of a purist. For me, G.I. Joe is a toy line, and a great one at that. I have far too many fond memories of playing with my G.I. Joe toys for anything, whether it be this unfortunate looking new movie, the old cartoons, or even the comics, to change my mind about what G.I. Joe is, was and should be. Sure I enjoyed the comics as much as anyone else could have. I even loved the cartoon, but for me these things were always secondary to the G.I. Joe property. I've actually never felt that any of the other tie-ins got it right. I did, however, understand why the comics and the cartoon where what they where, but to me neither ever managed to live up to the toys themselves.
To me G.I. Joe always was serious. The cartoon and sometimes the comic were goofy and light-hearted because that's what they had to be at the time for not only the target audience as well as the parent groups who dictated standards for that stuff. My concept of G.I. Joe comes solely from the toys themselves. These guys were (and were designed to be) soldiers plain and simple. They came with real weapons (not laser guns that never did any damage), rode in real military vehicles, and wore somewhat stylized to be sure, but outfits that were inspired by real soldiers uniforms. Yes, I know that sometimes the file cards were written to be a little tongue in cheek, or at least with some sense of irony, but nothing I read in them ever made the characters seem goofy or not serious (with a few possible exceptions based more on the overall concept of the character than anything else - I'm looking at you, Raptor!) The cartoons, and to a slightly lesser extent, the comics had to be toned down and made to be fairly light-hearted because that's what was (and is still) expected for a children's property. The G.I. Joe movie I was hoping for was one based on the toys; the Joes that I remember as being the real Joes as opposed to a movie based on the comics, or the cartoon.
Let's be honest here, though - how many of us as kids played out battles with our Joes that worked out like they did in the cartoon? My Quick Kick never spoke in any lame approximation of a Humphrey Bogart impersonation; regardless of the fact that I'd just had to sit through that very thing while watching the cartoon just minutes before.
By the way, if any of you guys did play out adventures like those portrayed in the cartoon - I apologize if I've offended, and I pity your incredible lameness at the same time.:p
Basically, I for one was really hoping for a slightly more serious take on the Joes than I had seen in either the cartoons or the comics - you know...the kind of Joe adventures I'd always wanted to see as a kid! The kind I always played out in my backyard. What I'm seeing here so far is not only not even close to that mark, but it actually looks like the folks in charge of the project are taking it too seriously to even give us the Joes we've been accustomed to seeing on television or in the funny books. Looks like a compromise so far off the mark as to actually be a cop out.

RooJay
05-09-2008, 05:14 AM
He just DID, and the whole "Character" was a dude in a silver mask who tried to help man-snake take over the world for a price

That is exactly why I think people are so disappointed with the Destro they're giving us here - the "character" was the mask, and I'm lookin' and I don't see no mask. Must be some other guy then, cause it sure ain't no Destro.

Beast
05-09-2008, 09:34 AM
and THAT is why they FAIL
They fail? Seem to be making pretty good money across the board.

JediTricks
05-09-2008, 03:07 PM
I just came on this thread to complain about how awful these pictures make this film look. Could the casting here be ANY worse? Duke as a petulant teenager... with a scar! Hawk as someone's grandpa who used to be in the movies! Ugh, this just looks awful, Sienna Miller as Baroness? That wig and costume are pretty far off, it looks like they simply tried to match the notes rather than the tone. Heavy Duty? Not seeing it. And while I love Christopher Eccleston... that Destro is so very wrong. And the long coat and baggy pants look on Storm Shadow, horrible, he looks small and lost in that one-note costume, reeks of poseur. It's like they took every character and costume, wrote down all the basics then rebuilt them without any soul or thought of casting to maximum suck tolerances.

Anyway, here's the pics I saw, same ones but all in one place: http://enewsi.com/news.php?catid=190&itemid=13234


OYES this movie already sucks rocks, the image of "destro" is idiotic- I'm sure there's tons of nerds who think that the subject matter was somehow totally hard-edge and realistic, and they'll be quite pleased at how much this monochromatic, joyless-looking piece of crap sucks lifeless arse, but seriously, I am gona pronouce the same thing I pronounced before that (some say ir's great) suck-festival called the Hulk came out

You can call it as brilliant as you like, and accuse the audience-in-general of not "getting" it but when it sucks MAJOR rocks in REAL LIFE and fails at the box office PLEASE don't think it was something no-one else "got", it's gonna be a piece of crap based (REAL loosely, hell, most of these "characters" were a single paragraph "deep", if they weren't soleley and cheaply defined by a friggin accessory) on seriously goofy one-note shards of artificial "gravitas"

I bet this movie will suck apes AND lions simultaneously

I can't WAIT to see how AWESOME folks think this obviously uhh "alternative culture" black leather COP OUT is, since anything with ANY colour in it is SO..... SOOO... well so before EVERYTHING HAD TO BE DAAAAAAARK AND SUCK ROCKS
:beard: Iso&Baws
I hope to hell this movie sucks at LEAST hard enough so as to be entertaining. The "original" Gi Joe was actually fun and had colours AND unusual costumes, since it was made before that stuff was considered lameThank you, this is totally right on the money.



As far as those pics go - I don't know...looking at them, if I didn't already know I'd think they could been from any cut-rate, direct-to-DVD action flick that might come around nowadays. It's really a shame that the folks in charge of this project don't seem interested in utilizing anything remotely resembling the original designs that made those characters so cool to begin with. I find them literally unrecognizable as G.I. Joe. The only two that are on the mark as far as costume designs are The Baroness and Snake-Eyes - too bad they decided to put the entire rest of the cast in the exact same costume as those two!Nice point! These look like crappy costumes you'd see on any cutrate Sci-Fi Channel saturday movie, lazy and black and piecey. To me, only Snake Eye's head looks right, the rest is a stupid muscle suit which isn't even how SE used to look. And the Baroness costume I think fails immensely, the texture of the corset looks like cheap generic Hollywood Blvd junk rather than smooth and snakey armor, the eyeglasses are all wrong, and she's known for having a big bustline with a big red Cobra emblem on it which is totally missing. Plus, Sienna Miller is so miscast there in the looks, she has a long face and that wig looks awful, Baroness has a "sweet" face which makes her bitterness that much more impressive, it's rounder and has a vicious smile - Sienna Miller I don't believe ever smiles, evil or otherwise.



and THAT is why they FAIL

I'm being serious here, how many die-hard fans really cared about WHY Destro wore a mask?? He just DID, and the whole "Character" was a dude in a silver mask who tried to help man-snake take over the world for a price
:beard: Iso&Baws

Seriously if the original is too out-of-date in ones mind DON'T BOTHER, just come up with your own ideaExcellent point! When GI Joe first burst on the scene, nobody gave a crap about origins, there was no need for "why", it just WAS and that made it easy to accept. We had colorful military characters with specialized abilities going all over the world fighting a terrorist organization that seemed to have unlimited foot soldiers and technology but no real ability to use them in menacing fashion. Who gives a **** about the "why" of GI Joe? That's what the comics were for, the majority of the world knew of it from the toy line and the cartoon. This movie could have given us that established feeling and it would have worked far better.

El Chuxter
05-09-2008, 03:20 PM
The more I look at these pics, the more I'm not feeling them after all.

Breaker obviously isn't going to be Alvin Kibbey, which means he's not Breaker. Or not the Breaker, at least. Which means we're getting into Transformers territory, with just use of familiar names and not the actual characters.

Note that they haven't released any pics of Ripcord, despite his supposedly being the main character, or of Cobra Commander, though his scenes are all done. Worried about the response, maybe?

I do think Snake Eyes and Baroness look pretty spot-on. (Have you seen costumers who make accurate Baroness costumes? They don't look good in reality. At all.)

I'm still giving this more credit than I did Transformers. X-Men and Transformers proved in different ways that it doesn't matter if you change the uniforms. (Though what appear to be fundamental changes to a few characters still concern me.)

Maradona
05-09-2008, 09:51 PM
Note that they haven't released any pics of Ripcord, despite his supposedly being the main character, or of Cobra Commander, though his scenes are all done. Worried about the response, maybe?



Here is the pic of Ripcord (or is it Duke...no wait, it's Breaker...no, it's Snake Eyes without his mask) :laugh::

http://chud.com/articles/articles/14653/1/EXCLUSIVE-IMAGE-RIPCORD-FROM-GI-JOE/Page1.html

I'm wondering, or maybe just hoping against reason, that these pics are some kind of "Night Force" versions of the team for a mission. As hokey as that sounds, I suspect that we'll be getting more than one version for all the characters. Hasbro probably will have repaints of the characters in "classic colors" for the toy line. But for the film, there might be some sort of passing shots of the characters in the familiar attire we all remember so fondly.

The more I think about it, I wonder if the way they will handle assembling the team in the film is the way that the M.A.S.K. team used to get summoned, where the call would go out to whoever was best suited for the mission. Maybe under that context, we'll get to see the characters wearing their REAL gear during their non-GI Joe lives. This system would also imply the larger makeup of the team and possibly create cameo moments where we could se other characters that would be recognized by their uniforms. Unlikely. I know.

As for the Cobras, I don't think we'll be getting blue uniforms with big red snakes on them. In fact, maybe the Joe pics we've gotten are them in Cobra disguises. This would explain why they all look like Baroness. I'm stretching, I know.

As for Destro, he won't be accepted without the mask, so maybe - MAYBE - the face is the mask and at some point in the film he gets shot or burned and that's how they will reveal his chrome skull mask. Then his voice could deepen a bit, leaving it unknown what Destro truly looks like.

Storm Shadow still looks terrible. A ninja is not supposed to dress like this. I don't see any explanation for this.

I'm grasping at straws. There probably is no redemption coming from this film.

2-1B
05-09-2008, 11:08 PM
The more I look at these pics, the more I'm not feeling them after all.

Breaker obviously isn't going to be Alvin Kibbey, which means he's not Breaker. Or not the Breaker, at least. Which means we're getting into Transformers territory, with just use of familiar names and not the actual characters.

Note that they haven't released any pics of Ripcord, despite his supposedly being the main character, or of Cobra Commander, though his scenes are all done. Worried about the response, maybe?

I do think Snake Eyes and Baroness look pretty spot-on. (Have you seen costumers who make accurate Baroness costumes? They don't look good in reality. At all.)

I'm still giving this more credit than I did Transformers. X-Men and Transformers proved in different ways that it doesn't matter if you change the uniforms. (Though what appear to be fundamental changes to a few characters still concern me.)
.
.
:hamasux:

JediTricks
05-10-2008, 04:22 PM
Note that they haven't released any pics of Ripcord, despite his supposedly being the main character... Worried about the response, maybe?Uh, Ripcord was seen in the link I just posted:
http://enewsi.com/news.php?catid=190&itemid=13234
The word "sucks" is thrown around a lot, but...



I do think ... Baroness look pretty spot-on. (Have you seen costumers who make accurate Baroness costumes? They don't look good in reality. At all.)That's the worst excuse I've ever heard, "some amateurs with little resources and time made bad versions". This design SUCKS, it's bottom-of-the-barrel quality, that belt and that corset are so off-the-rack it's embarrassing - THAT looks like a bad costumer attempt (an especially lazy costumer at that).

mabudonicus
05-10-2008, 04:36 PM
Thanks JT for saying what I was trying to say much more eloquently, it's good to have a translator sometimes

I must say that Storm Shadow, if you want a "real" film looks very much like a Yakuza without sunglasses- he is in fact the least offensive design besides Snake Eyes
:beard: Iso&Baws
Still not lookin very interesting at this stage but I am willing to give it a shot, hell I actually saw Transformers after all :D

El Chuxter
05-10-2008, 05:06 PM
Hey, if you want total accuracy to the cartoon without regard to how it looks, consider that only one live action Batman has been consistent with what's been his costume (with only minor cosmetic changes) since 1939.

I'm all for minor changes if a total translation to live action looks at gumpy as this.

preacher
05-11-2008, 01:57 PM
These designs are no worse than the X-men. And as another poster mentioned Batman. I can see what the production team is trying to do here. What I don't want to see is a bunch of roughnecks in football jersey's going on full blown delta force like missions. I always thought GI JOE treaded on the camp factor far more than other 80s franchise because while its about a specially trained mission force the costume designs back then don't follow the story's set rules. Point out one soldier in combat right now that wears football jersey's and punches things instead of shooting them (the joes had perfectly good guns and never used them!). Yeah this is looking more and more like Metal Gear the Movie, or Splinter Cell the movie but that is how real special ops are conducted. You can't say on one hand that Cobra is a real threat and expect the audience to believe that this GI JOE special missions force was formed to take on Cobra and MARS and then turn around and have the JOES wearing bright colored Jersey's or bright colored whatever and then successfully infiltrate enemy territory. This does two things: makes the enemy seem really stupid (in which case why is there even a threat) and two makes the main characters seem rediculous. The audience would out walk on this.

As far as I'm concerned this is a better attempt at realism than Transformers was. I've posted numerous complaints about The Transformers movie. Most notably that Megatron as far as I am concerned isn't Megatron without his oversized Canon, and Starscream as far as I'm concerned isn't Starscream without his sardonic sneer that set him apart from the other jets. My biggest complaint however was that all the servos and gears from the Transformers were exposed all the time. Prime's mouth was covered during fights which basically indicated that there was a battle mode and yet none of the other parts were covered during combat. You see in Bays twisted brain every part of the robots except the head is impervious to damage. Oh but wait! The US armed forces took down Skorponok. Hmmm. Where is the logic in that mess. Its rediculous. The audience will have a sense of purpose and rules ten minutes into the film. By then they will have a preconception of how the world in any mythology is ran.

Now that being said, Destro's interpretation is an abomination. If you guys flip back through this thread I predicted Destro was going to look pretty much the way he looks. Black Italian pinstrip suit with a red shirt. He needs his mask - its his character as much as Megatron's canon is his character. I can think of few Joe's where the uniform is part of their character the way Desto's mask is his. Maybe Gung Ho being shirtless like Jesse Ventura in Predator. Maybe Shipwreck with his sailor hat and tatoos. But that's it.



Except Destro.

Phantom-like Menace
05-11-2008, 11:39 PM
I think my biggest problem with the costumes is that such a radical change is unnecessary. Of course the X-Men's costumes wouldn't translate well into the real world, so fine put them in black leather, but for those Joes whose costumes don't work, I'd rather see them in BDUs than battle armored wetsuits.

And why is it that Snake Eyes, the one guy who should be wearing a black bodysuit, gets military, BDU-style pants?

JediTricks
05-12-2008, 05:20 AM
Hey, if you want total accuracy to the cartoon without regard to how it looks, consider that only one live action Batman has been consistent with what's been his costume (with only minor cosmetic changes) since 1939.

I'm all for minor changes if a total translation to live action looks at gumpy as this.Well, hopefully modern costuming and body shaping will keep THAT from happening, but that's such an extreme that it's totally unfair. That was from a different era and had a very low budget, and it was meant to be campy. With a better eye for detail and design, and a better body on the wearer, it could have worked.

But by all means, let's "translate" the Joe costumes into generic, dark crap that tells us far too little about the character despite that being the Joe's costumes' number one job, that should make a film that's true to the essence of the property instead of yet another bland worthless nostalgia rehash. :rolleyes:



These designs are no worse than the X-men. And as another poster mentioned Batman. I can see what the production team is trying to do here. What I don't want to see is a bunch of roughnecks in football jersey's going on full blown delta force like missions. I always thought GI JOE treaded on the camp factor far more than other 80s franchise because while its about a specially trained mission force the costume designs back then don't follow the story's set rules. Point out one soldier in combat right now that wears football jersey's and punches things instead of shooting them (the joes had perfectly good guns and never used them!). Yeah this is looking more and more like Metal Gear the Movie, or Splinter Cell the movie but that is how real special ops are conducted. You can't say on one hand that Cobra is a real threat and expect the audience to believe that this GI JOE special missions force was formed to take on Cobra and MARS and then turn around and have the JOES wearing bright colored Jersey's or bright colored whatever and then successfully infiltrate enemy territory. This does two things: makes the enemy seem really stupid (in which case why is there even a threat) and two makes the main characters seem rediculous. The audience would out walk on this.Yeah, that's really true to the GI Joe concept, make a "realistic" movie, because GI Joe is all about realism and a true conveying of special ops military design and fighting real threats that are totally believable. GI Joe is nothing if not a generic military property. :ermm: If you want realism, watch Black Hawk Down. GI Joe is supposed to be about, oh, I dunno, a TOY LINE!



You see in Bays twisted brain every part of the robots except the head is impervious to damage. Oh but wait! The US armed forces took down Skorponok. Hmmm. Where is the logic in that mess.They took down Brawl too and he was the biggest, toughest one. It's because the robots couldn't take the extreme temperatures... never mind that they all experienced extremes in the vacuum of space and then in atmospheric entry, and that plot hole only existed because Bay & co took out the TFs' spaceships.

preacher
05-12-2008, 09:05 AM
JT, if this movie were made 100% to reflect the designs from the cartoon and toyline it the movie would tank. Nobody wants to see a JOE movie that looks like the cartoon. Cobra Officers that couldn't shoot the broad side of an aircraft carrier from two feet away. JOEs that punch instead of shoot. It would come across as a lampoon and nobody would give it any respect. There are so many examples. Adam West's Batman is king of cheese. And Street Fighter ranks right up there in the cheese. The flick has to be grounded in reality to some extent. People are bombarded daily with news from Iraq whether good or bad and have developed some preconception of how our military is suited.

Now I'm not saying the Joe's need to look like Solid Snake, or Sam Fisher clones all the time. There would be clever ways to show the JOEs in the attire of their toy counterpart. At headquarters during training they could be in BDUs as was suggested or if they do recon work in the jungle then be wearing jungle camo fatigues, if in snow arctic fatigues, desert fatigues, SEAL wetsuits and so on. Wherever the action takes them, they best be wearing something suitable for the environment. I just don't know of many places where Scarlet's toy attire (purple spandex with tan catsuit thingy, gloves, and high heel boots) would work unless you are an extra on one of the Star Wars prequels. Zartan, Destro, and Baroness get a free pass because - well - they're the bad guys. And bad guys are supposed to dress odd, be flamboyant, nutty, a tad of a megalomaniac.

There was also a complaint about General Hawk being a geriatric. Name one five star general that isn't. I think the better complaint would be choice in actor to play the role. Ugh.

2-1B
05-12-2008, 05:49 PM
It seems like there isn't a lot of excitement for this movie.

RooJay
05-13-2008, 02:15 AM
As for Destro, he won't be accepted without the mask, so maybe - MAYBE - the face is the mask and at some point in the film he gets shot or burned and that's how they will reveal his chrome skull mask. Then his voice could deepen a bit, leaving it unknown what Destro truly looks like.

Yeah, sorry but that sounds just about as craptastic as that picture. That having been said, rest assured that your idea is probably hundreds of times better than what is likely to actually happen with Destro on film.

RooJay
05-13-2008, 02:18 AM
These designs are no worse than the X-men.

Good point! Dare I say it - I was never too fond of the X-Men's movie costumes either.

JediTricks
05-13-2008, 02:59 AM
JT, if this movie were made 100% to reflect the designs from the cartoon and toyline it the movie would tank. Nobody wants to see a JOE movie that looks like the cartoon. Cobra Officers that couldn't shoot the broad side of an aircraft carrier from two feet away. JOEs that punch instead of shoot. It would come across as a lampoon and nobody would give it any respect. Hi, you do know that this is based on a TOY line, right, and deserves not much respect, right? GI Joe is a little corny, there's nothing sacrosanct about it, it's guys in unusual costumes taking on a safe enemy. Which would you rather have, a generic, bland military movie that waters down everything that GI Joe: A Real American Hero was about, or one that's at least trying to be true to the material? There can be a balance between 100% authentic to the license and 100% movie-realism.


There are so many examples. Adam West's Batman is king of cheese. And Street Fighter ranks right up there in the cheese. The flick has to be grounded in reality to some extent. People are bombarded daily with news from Iraq whether good or bad and have developed some preconception of how our military is suited. Hey, don't bring Street Fighter into this, that movie wasn't authentic to jack squat, it tried to take an awesome video game and make it "realistic" the way you're talking about, and failed miserably.


Now I'm not saying the Joe's need to look like Solid Snake, or Sam Fisher clones all the time. There would be clever ways to show the JOEs in the attire of their toy counterpart. At headquarters during training they could be in BDUs as was suggested or if they do recon work in the jungle then be wearing jungle camo fatigues, if in snow arctic fatigues, desert fatigues, SEAL wetsuits and so on. Wherever the action takes them, they best be wearing something suitable for the environment. I just don't know of many places where Scarlet's toy attire (purple spandex with tan catsuit thingy, gloves, and high heel boots) would work unless you are an extra on one of the Star Wars prequels. Zartan, Destro, and Baroness get a free pass because - well - they're the bad guys. And bad guys are supposed to dress odd, be flamboyant, nutty, a tad of a megalomaniac.The funny thing is, GI Joe is basically cut from the same cloth as those eccentric '80s action films, the ones that took realism and chucked it right out the window, where the heroes could wear whatever the hell they liked so long as they kicked ***. And now we're trying to neuter that in the name of "realism", but the villains get a free pass because... well, it's ok for them??? We don't need more dour, "taking itself too seriously" type of movies, we have plenty from the past 15 years or so.


There was also a complaint about General Hawk being a geriatric. Name one five star general that isn't. I think the better complaint would be choice in actor to play the role. Ugh.Great call there, another "realism" claim that backs up a geezer in the role. :rolleyes: Did Hawk ever seem like he was in his mid-50s to you before? Not to me. And he wasn't a 5-star general, he was a brigadier general, that's a 1-star general (Smedley Butler was a brigadier general at the age of 37).

El Chuxter
05-13-2008, 08:28 AM
Hawk started GIJoe as a Colonel and was promoted at a very young age after General Flagg was killed.

2-1B
05-13-2008, 06:13 PM
Destro will wear the mask in the movie, didn't you guys read the bios on those pages before you hurried back to post about how dumb this looks?

For the record, I agree with you all on how dumb this looks.

preacher
05-13-2008, 06:29 PM
Yes. I am aware GI JOE is toy line. I would prefer the movie to reflect the sensabilities of the comic book. Where Cobra is a real threat, not a safe enemy where its possibility for actions to have real and relevant consequences. The baroness can get burned, the Cobra commander can get killed, snake eyes can get tortured. Not that I wish to see any of that, I just want that sense of "hey Cobra isn't to be underestimated". Now granted the comic book had its share of "oh brother" moments. But at least when I read it I felt the threat. There was no threat in the cartoon because the enemy was safe in that venue.

Clearly, my preference is to have a movie that doesn't follow the cartoon storytelling formula where Cobra is as much a threat as Dr Evil is to Austin Powers and about equally rediculous. I don't see how you can make cobra a threat if the JOEs are as colorful as the care bears but still somehow manage to sneak by the enemy. And like I said earlier if they aren't a threat the audience (not the fans - I mean the people that know squat about the mythology) will wonder why this highly special trained missions force is dedicated to defending human freedom against COBRA. A ruthless, terrorist, organization determined to rule the world. Ruthless, terrorist, organization...
Very familiar to today's world and like it or not sets up expectations.

If you can explain to me how to make this balance so one is 100% authentic to the GI JOE property but at the same time 100% realistic I would like to hear it. And that isn't to be condescending, I'm being Serious. I'd like to know your thoughts.

Droid
05-13-2008, 07:23 PM
I wouldn't have brought one moment's realism to this. I would have had Cobra come up with a crazy James Bond type plot to rule the world, just like in the cartoon. I might of even done the Weather Dominator or the Pyramid of Darkness. I would have totally done the scene where Duke and Snake Eyes had to fight. Why? Because Cobra Commander is a bit "off" and his crazy plots don't always make sense.

This movie should have been colorful and zany and fun and over the top without George Lucas style poop jokes or slapstick comedy.

I mean if you want to think too much about this, why wouldn't every plot just end with G.I. Joe doing an air strike on Cobra's base? Don't overthink it, just make a movie based on the material, which is why people are supposedly going anyway.

El Chuxter
05-13-2008, 08:29 PM
That's the thing preacher and I (and I think a few others) are getting at. There were simultaneously a comic series and cartoon, set in different universes. Even as a kid, I thought the cartoon was goofy (still liked it, though) and the comic was the "real" GIJoe.

Among other things, Doc got his head blown off, Cobra Commander's son was used in an assassination scheme against him, the Baroness got fried and had to have major reconstructive surgery, Cobra invaded at least three fictitious countries, Zartan put an arrow through Serpentor's head and Firefly later desecrated his corpse, and Cobra Commander personally tried to kill a boatload of named Cobras (including Zartan, Firefly, and his own son) because two of them had been involved in the scheme to replace him (and one had later "repented" and paved the way for his return).

One of the first lines we ever heard from the Baroness wasn't a seductive, "Smashing, dahling," or whatever cockamamie line she had in the cartoon. It was "Alright, I've got your precious Doctor Burkhart now! Back off, or I'll turn her face into a fine red mist!"

Snake Eyes never breakdanced. Instead, he lived a tortured existence, forced to hide his face from the world (and we saw, in flashbacks, the helicopter explosion and him running around in the aftermath with his head totally on fire), unable to speak, and knowing his best friend in the world had become his deadliest enemy.

Yeah, these two worlds were light years apart. It was pretty hardcore considering it was based on a toy line and aimed at pre-teens.

JediTricks
05-13-2008, 08:56 PM
Yes. I am aware GI JOE is toy line. I would prefer the movie to reflect the sensibilities of the comic book. Where Cobra is a real threat, not a safe enemy where its possibility for actions to have real and relevant consequences. The baroness can get burned, the Cobra commander can get killed, snake eyes can get tortured. Not that I wish to see any of that, I just want that sense of "hey Cobra isn't to be underestimated". Now granted the comic book had its share of "oh brother" moments. But at least when I read it I felt the threat. There was no threat in the cartoon because the enemy was safe in that venue.Which comic though, the Marvel one or the Devil's Due one? Each has its own sense of "reality" and such, and those sorts of decompressed storytelling where bad guys can get hurt and real consequences can be ongoing don't make for particularly compelling movies, which only have 2 hours to get the job that a regular comic might take months or even years to do. And the characterizations start somewhere, originally it was the costumes.


Clearly, my preference is to have a movie that doesn't follow the cartoon storytelling formula where Cobra is as much a threat as Dr Evil is to Austin Powers and about equally rediculous. I don't see how you can make cobra a threat if the JOEs are as colorful as the care bears but still somehow manage to sneak by the enemy. And like I said earlier if they aren't a threat the audience (not the fans - I mean the people that know squat about the mythology) will wonder why this highly special trained missions force is dedicated to defending human freedom against COBRA. A ruthless, terrorist, organization determined to rule the world. Ruthless, terrorist, organization...
Very familiar to today's world and like it or not sets up expectations.

If you can explain to me how to make this balance so one is 100% authentic to the GI JOE property but at the same time 100% realistic I would like to hear it. And that isn't to be condescending, I'm being Serious. I'd like to know your thoughts.There's no such thing as "100% realistic" with GI Joe, that's just not going to happen, it's not supposed to. There has to be a balance between realism and the original property which people most identify with to make for a good movie, and I don't think the current notion of a mostly-generic, dark-costumed group fighting terrorist cells under COBRA falls close enough to the original property, hence my claim of generic. I think the disagreement here is ultimately that you ARE serious about this, you think GI Joe is sacrosanct and completely worthy of believable military cinema; I don't think that way, it started as a toy line, and after the unbelievably drab first year's toy line it got into comic book fantasy styling (I don't mean the GI Joe comic, I mean stuff like Nick Fury with the more fantastical technology and such) - the '83 lineup is where we got Destro, Wild Bill, Gung Ho, Major Bludd, and '84 took that even further with Baroness, Roadblock, Spirit, Zartan, and Storm Shadow, and that was all before the comic or the show. The more you take GI Joe out of the fantastic, the less it becomes GI Joe.

My thoughts of GI Joe start with the exciting fantasy vehicles and colorful characters and weapons, and end with the phrases "YO JOE!" and "COOOOOBRRRRRAAAAA!!!!" - that's ultimately where the heart of the franchise lives for most people familiar with it, where do you put realism in any of that without killing it?

Maradona
05-13-2008, 09:03 PM
Two words:

Cold Slither

preacher
05-15-2008, 04:24 PM
One more word:

Cobra-La