View Full Version : I Had A Dream That I Was Running For Political Office

06-16-2008, 02:08 PM
In my dream I was reading the local newspaper as I do every morning, and alas I finally made the news!

My dreams are very clear and I remember what I read, line for line.

We have a conservatively-slanted paper here in San Diego, so the report was depricating towards me, but as I can love negative attention, I enjoyed it like any of my other instigative acts. The article was quite funny really. It read:

"Newcomer Joshua A. Weiselberg filed his paperwork to enter the race today. His entry comes rather late, much like the home team sending in a pinch-hitter at the bottom of the ninth, with there being 2 outs already. A known radical leftist, Weiselberg seems to want to model himself after Joseph Stalin or Mao Tse Tung, but we'll forgive him for that as we know he really means well. However, we have to scratch our heads and wonder how Sally the single Soccer-Mom will handle receiving a political phone call from him, after a 16 hour day between work and caring for her children, when Weiselberg phones her and asks her to join in support of his vision for a New World Order."

I woke up laughing from this one. But it pretty much fits with how reality probably would turn out.

El Chuxter
06-16-2008, 02:18 PM
I had a dream where Jesus came back to Earth, but His powers weren't as great as everyone thought they'd be because He was trapped in a mortal shell. So He used his superhuman strength, speed, and agility as a superhero. He would try to talk evildoers into giving up their evil ways, but beat them up if necessary. His catchphrase, whenever the bad guys were beaten into submission, was, "My Father forgives you. But you'd better hand yourself over to the authorities if you know what's good for you, because there's more a**-whooping where that came from!"

06-16-2008, 02:24 PM
Tycho, I know you too well. This was not about your aspirations for political office but a thinly veiled attempt at hitting on "Sally the single Soccer-Mom". I believe you have developed a taste for milf.

Just admit it, it's all about s*x with you man!:yes:

06-16-2008, 02:26 PM
I had a dream in which R. Kelly got away with peeing on a 13-year-old girl, paving the way for pedophiles with a golden shower fetish to practice their love all over the country!

06-16-2008, 02:27 PM
I had a dream I was running FROM political office!!!

06-16-2008, 02:34 PM
i Had A Dream I Was Running From Political Office!!!


06-16-2008, 02:36 PM
I had a dream that a hamburger was eating me!!

06-16-2008, 02:37 PM
In Soviet Russia, hamburger eats you!