PDA

View Full Version : I do not freakin' believe this!



El Chuxter
11-14-2009, 10:23 PM
I've got too many toys, mostly Star Wars stuff. I want to trim down my collection; I don't need two Malakilis, I simply don't have room for 75%+ of my vehicles and probably never will, and I have no desire to display much of anything from AOTC or ROTS. I've made a couple of false starts in clearing out this mass over the past two or three years, and had finally gotten myself ready to get rid of this stuff.

For a few years after we met, my wife aided and abetted me in gathering crap. "Don't pass on that R2-D2 with the string feature. You'll regret it later." Then, she started complaining about the amount of crap. I honestly can't say I blame her.

So, now that I'm finally psyched to clear out some junk and properly display whatever I keep (which is still likely to be a lot, but a manageable lot), I've been pretty much forbidden to sell, trade, or donate it. :confused: "You bought that, so you shouldn't get rid of it. I'd rather you not buy anything now than get rid of stuff you have." I've so far been unable to convince her that, given my likes and interests, a new Dewback means far, far more to me than four extra General Grievouses.

I can't even get rid of the Imperial Shuttle that's been gathering dust on an entire shelf in the garage for years, and which at least one person here asked me about.

Any advice? Honestly, I want to clear out this stuff. Someone here or a kid could appreciate it more than I can. I could get rid of a few small things without her knowing, but stuff like the aforementioned Shuttle would be bloody obvious when they're suddenly missing.

Darth Jax
11-14-2009, 10:33 PM
if you can't sell, donate or trade it - i'm thinking the only other option is to keep it.

sith_killer_99
11-14-2009, 10:52 PM
Okay, so I had a whole long post about this, but then I thought better of it...

I'm not touching this one with a 10 foot pole.:p

Old Fossil
11-14-2009, 11:00 PM
Guess we know Who Wears the Pants in that family.

NerfTW
11-14-2009, 11:16 PM
I find just breaking up with them works. Now I have a whole wall to put my figures on.....




OH GOD I'M GONNA DIE ALONE!!!! :cry:


(Joking, honestly)

Rocketboy
11-14-2009, 11:33 PM
Tell her since she's the one that wants it, it's her job to take care of it all.

Or just dump a bunch of it in a Toys For Tots box and tell her she can't yell at you or that'll make her a bad person. :D

bobafrett
11-14-2009, 11:54 PM
Give them to Bobafrett, I hear he's an upstanding gentleman, or so I've heard.

JediTricks
11-15-2009, 12:09 AM
Put your foot down. Try explaining to her that you don't keep that old Ford Pinto once it's gone out of fashion, you buy a new Ford Focus and wait until it becomes another Pinto, then get rid of it. ;)

Explain it to her this way: for the previous years you owned this stuff, it satiated your needs. Extras fueled your imagination on future uses, even when you didn't actually put them to that use. However, as time passes, technology has kept a brisk pace and created replacements of those items that are of vastly superior quality. As this is one of your chief hobbies, it is important that you not let it merely stagnate in the past, lest it really become just a pile of dust-collectors, which is why you need to buy new figures and get rid of the old ones that are replaced by them. Donating them can result in a warm feeling and perhaps some level of tax write-off, trading can result in helping out BOTH parties, and selling can result in at least seeing some level of return on your consumer goods.

Or, you know, just grow a dynamic duo. :D



Give them to Bobafrett, I hear he's an upstanding gentleman, or so I've heard.Oh yeah, right, so he can end up having the EXACT same argument with Robin. ;)

El Chuxter
11-15-2009, 01:26 AM
Oh, I've not been told not to buy new toys. She's just made it clear she's going to complain about them. Her argument seems to be "if we have another kid, and it's a boy, and he wants those toys, what are you going to do?" I'm just going to wait until tomorrow and bring it up again.

I could get rid of everything, but, well, I don't want to listen to it. :D

Seriously, man, I cannot believe that, after complaining for years (and not understanding that limiting myself to OT figures and the very occasional prequel figure or OT vehicle is a serious scaling back to begin with), she's going to suddenly try to keep things like the ARC-170 or the Shuttle, stuff I know other people would love to have.

JediTricks
11-15-2009, 01:30 AM
You're the one who said "I'd rather you not buy anything now than get rid of stuff you have." That's why I got the impression it'd be a sticking point.

Ok, use my argument above minus the buying thing. Or how about this analogy: "is our son really going to want to play with those old things? We didn't save our Pong machines just in case fantastic, richly-detailed, 3D graphics ever went back out of style and the next generation needed to learn how to use paddle controllers. Our parents didn't save their old black & white TVs in the hopes that we'd want to use 75-ohm dual-prong antenna leads and manual potentiometer dial controls that can't even get modern broadcast frequencies anymore."

Maybe she secretly wants to build dioramas like Tycho does, and doesn't have the nerve to tell you. ;)

El Chuxter
11-15-2009, 01:36 AM
Hmmm, maybe you've got a point there. ;)

She did say that about preferring I not buy any new toys, but she knows that's a lost cause. Heck, after a few weeks of nada, I dropped around $70 yesterday, and it would've been more if the Dewbacks I found looked better. As long as we don't get kicked out of our house because I'm buying toys instead of paying the mortgage, I think she knows it's unlikely to happen.

(She should probably count her blessings that Marvel went to inferior large and then inferior small figures, GIJoe and Transformers are all movie stuff (and Transformers movie stuff is incompatible with the Classics), Star Wars is focused on Clone Wars, and DC got so insanely overpriced for winners like Firestorm and Captain Cold that I dropped it aside from the occasional Batman villain I can't find so it's not an issue.)

Rocketboy
11-15-2009, 01:55 AM
Start decorating the house with figures and vehicles everywhere.
When she gets p*ssed you can say "Well, since I can't get rid of 'em, I might as well display and enjoy each and every one."

sebillba
11-15-2009, 03:29 AM
Turn the tables - I'm assuming, as a woman, she likes to shop? Shoes, tops, earrings, make-up, all the usual crap women find exciting. Tell her that closet full of shoes should already be enough for her, well she can only wear one pair at a time, so she doesn't need to buy the latest fashions. Tell her she doesn't need that new improved lipstick, when the one she's been wearing for years does the job just fine. Tell her in language she'll understand, and make her see this stuff goes both ways.

Lord Malakite
11-15-2009, 04:15 AM
Put your foot down. Try explaining to her that you don't keep that old Ford Pinto once it's gone out of fashion, you buy a new Ford Focus and wait until it becomes another Pinto, then get rid of it. ;) But if you get rid of it what will you use for a "shooting car" and where will the neighborhood strays and occasional raccoon going to have their babies?

JediTricks
11-15-2009, 06:10 AM
Start decorating the house with figures and vehicles everywhere.
When she gets p*ssed you can say "Well, since I can't get rid of 'em, I might as well display and enjoy each and every one."Hmm, I think the backlash there is that the desired result goes beyond and she ends up saying that it all goes.



Turn the tables - I'm assuming, as a woman, she likes to shop? Shoes, tops, earrings, make-up, all the usual crap women find exciting. Tell her that closet full of shoes should already be enough for her, well she can only wear one pair at a time, so she doesn't need to buy the latest fashions. Tell her she doesn't need that new improved lipstick, when the one she's been wearing for years does the job just fine. Tell her in language she'll understand, and make her see this stuff goes both ways.So, like a reverse "The Gift of the Magi". :p Mutually Assured Destruction only results in 1 thing.



But if you get rid of it what will you use for a "shooting car" and where will the neighborhood strays and occasional raccoon going to have their babies?We did this once when I was about 12, neighbor lady saw us beating on our car with tire irons and pulled a shotgun on us. That was the last time I ever wailed on a Chrysler New Yorker. But a significant portion of the LAPD surrounded our neighborhood after my mom called in to complain that a woman pulled a shotgun on us (my mom didn't call 911, but they heard "shotgun pointed at kid" and FREAKED OUT! Multiple helicopters!).

bobafrett
11-15-2009, 09:09 AM
Oh, I've not been told not to buy new toys. She's just made it clear she's going to complain about them. Her argument seems to be "if we have another kid, and it's a boy, and he wants those toys, what are you going to do?" I'm just going to wait until tomorrow and bring it up again.



Do as I do, I have a bunch of figures that are out of her sight. Sure she tells me not to spend my money on Star Wars, but so did my dad, did it stop me? No. As far as the having a baby thing, well my wife and I have tried, but in three years of trying, nothing happened, and I doubt if it will. Good Luck to ya!

elvandrik
11-15-2009, 10:00 AM
Any advice? Honestly, I want to clear out this stuff. Someone here or a kid could appreciate it more than I can. I could get rid of a few small things without her knowing, but stuff like the aforementioned Shuttle would be bloody obvious when they're suddenly missing.

Here's what I do, and it has REALLY worked for me. Take all the Star Wars stuff that you are never gonna display or just dont like, and start selling it on e-bay. Then, take the money you make on e-bay and use that money to buy/replace items in your collection. So when a new figure or vehicle comes out that just blows the old one away (like the BMF or new AT-ST), you just use the money from your e-bay sales to fund it. In that sense, your Star Wars collection becomes a zero-sum game because it funds itself.

For example, I've bought $500 worth of Star Wars stuff in the last 3 weeks. How? I sold about 10% of all the Star Wars stuff that was sitting in boxes. If I would have bought $500 worth of stuff unfunded, my wife would have killed me. She loves the idea that my collection now funds itself. It also allows you to buy new stuff guilt-free because you don't feel like you are taking money that your family needs elsewhere.

Not only are your new purchases funded, but it also cuts down on all the clutter in your house from your undisplayed stuff. You actually gain storage space back in your house because you aren't stockpiling boxes.

Trust me, It works!

Neuroleptic
11-15-2009, 10:15 AM
I think this is the first time I'v ever heard of someone's significant other telling the collector they can't get rid of there collection to make room. (If I understand that is).

Honestly El, I think you need to just put the extera stuff up for sale on ebay or donate it to toys for tots and be done with it. The former would easily allow you to not have to spend money on new items for your collection for a good long time, and the later would be a wonderful thing to do for a whole bunch of little kids.

She'll probably be happy with the huge amount of space your family will suddenly have. I condenced my collection down to a book shelf, and three small shelves in the living room. If it would go in storage, I wont buy it. If I want it I have to sell something else to make room for it. I find this to be the absolute best way to control collections so they don't get seriously out of hand or take up entierly too much room in ones house.

I say do it regardless of what she says, because honestly? She'll probably come around when she realizes the house was so damned big!

Neuroleptic
11-15-2009, 11:07 AM
[this is Neuro's wife, by the way -- he's told me this story and suffice it to say my jaw pretty much hit the floor several times during the conversation]

I just feel immensely sorry for you. I know we women have a knack for being confusing at times and saying/doing weird thing, but this takes the cake as far as I'm concerned.

Like Neuro said, we have always (well, since we got married at least) had an arrangement. I collect books and yarn and he is pretty much cool with me having as much of those things as I want (as long as we can afford it and as long as they don't outgrow their alloted spaces -- two bookshelves in the living room and a couple of storage totes) and I have given him the same "deal" regarding his Star Wars stuff. I regularly send books I've read to a consignment store or to other members of my book club, and things I make with yarn are either useful to us or given as gifts or donations. For me, this is a healthy purging of things I don't want which allows me to buy new things I do want without overflowing the space (sales at Hobby Lobby, woohoo! a used bookstore? awesome!). Neuro does much the same with his Star Wars things -- probably on an annual or so basis, he puts together a small lot to sell on eBay, consisting of things he has extras of or that have fallen out of favor. Then if he happens to see something he wants on eBay or at a store, he has both the money and the space to have it.

I think there may a deeper issue here -- your mentioned that your wife wants to save these things for a future child. Women get weird when babies are involved -- I can tell you this from personal experience. Or maybe these things have some sort of sentimental value to her -- you did mention that she helped you in finding/purchasing many of them. Maybe it has more to do with that than it might at first seem.

Perhaps by trying to find out the real cause of why she seems so set on holding on to these things, you will be able to work out a solution that is acceptable to both of you.

Best of luck.

LusiferSam
11-15-2009, 12:37 PM
Fire. Fire fixes everything. Burn, burn, burn, buuuuuuurn!

I'd offer to help, but I'm not allowed to play with matches anymore and all my lighters have been taken away.

bigbarada
11-15-2009, 12:56 PM
Fire. Fire fixes everything. Burn, burn, burn, buuuuuuurn!

I'd offer to help, but I'm not allowed to play with matches anymore and all my lighters have been taken away.

This would be my advice too. Then you can convince her that you NEED that new Dewback as consolation for all of your lost stuff. ;)

Snowtrooper
11-15-2009, 02:40 PM
Maybe donate and sell stuff slowly, like a few items every few days. Unless she knows exactly every thing you have, she'll probably never notice. It will probably work only for smaller items, the larger ones might get noticed. Of course, if she finds out about it..........:twisted:

JediTricks
11-15-2009, 03:47 PM
If she doesn't know SW that well, just replace the old stuff secretly and when she asks if it's new, say no, you've had that for years. ;)

Ando
11-16-2009, 04:14 PM
Great thread!

I agree with the last two posts.

Here's my 2 cents:

Does she actually know what you have? I have TONS of stuff and since most of it is down in the basement, my wife doesn't see it nor does she know what I have or remember what I have.

If your wife gave it to you or helped you find it, keep it. That's what I have been doing...

Do you have nieces and nephews? Are your folks still alive (are hers?). If you're not displaying it or playing with it, give it to a niece or nephew. I have been spinning off extras of my vehicle collection and taking it to my mom and dad's house so the nephews have something to play with when they are at Bubby and Gampa Steve's house.

So far I have dropped off a Republic Fighter Tank and a V-19. Next will be an ARC-170, a AT-TE, and a V Wing.

It was always in the grand plan of my collection to one day leave it to my nephews (and future nieces and possibly kids), so I decided to start early. I have 6 of all the vehicles I mentioned, so it will only drop me down to 5 of everything and they'll be happy because they have lots of cool stuff to play with.

Grandparents don't always know what kids like and my mom's been super happy with me bringing stuff for her to keep at the house.