View Full Version : ATTENTION All you STAR WARS collectors who hate scalpers

05-31-2002, 10:23 PM
Now I'm hoping this thread doesn't get deleted or moved. I really didn't know where to post it. But since this is the current action figure forum i thought i'd do it here. Now I work for a company that does film and other stuff. Well I was sitting around thinking. I want to write a short about scalpers. I can't decide if i want to make it a mockumentary/fake documentary or if I want to make it a actual movie with characters and a story. Now if I do the mockumentary it would be following like 2 or 3 different scalpers around Orlando / Central Florida. It would be a comedy for all us toy collectors out there. I would focus on Star Wars figures only. I wanted to see what yall would think of this or if you'd buy it on amazon. I would shoot on real film with a crew and actors. I want to make this funny and goto some extremes here.Heres some of my ideas

Show a scalper driving in the car with a camera man in a format like cops going from store to store to store scalping buying up 30 o the same figure

Have a scalper sit down and explain the art of scalping how he goes from store to making a figure "rare" and putting it on ebay for the suckers.

Show some reactment stuff as some tell stories "like the time a friend made an ugly girl at a store his girlfriend so he could scalp the toys" or "the time he got a job at Target and got caught scalping the toys and was fired and given a trespassing warrant and then had to sneak back in the store in a disguise to get the good stuff and getting busted or something like that"

"A scalper taking a rare figure out of the hands of a child in a wheelchair and knocking him over."

i need extremes. stuff that funny yet sad at the same time.lol

maybe a fistfight over figs. The guys running to the toys as soon as the doors open. Paying guys on the truck to get them the goods. Just all the extremes. I need as many Ideas as possible for scenarios if you want to contribute I will credit you name in the credits. This will be shot on a moderate budget on film or DV and will be about 30-35mins long. It will only be sold on the internet if the project even gets picked up by my bosses. I think this could be very funny if scripted right. If anyone would like to co write this with me as i'm not the great ever on dialogue you'd get credit and if it gets picked up a percentage of sales or payment. LMK I need funny stories and someone to properly write down and explain the art of scalping from a scalper's point of view and then a regular toy collector. So if your interested in working on this or contributing or even just wanna see something like this get done. Post here or email me at ABetterTomorrow2@aol.com

thanks for your time and effort i hope to get everyone involved in the creative process here.


05-31-2002, 10:32 PM
i think this would be a real funny thing, hey come down here to south florida, there are plenty of scalpers here. i like all thoses ideas.

Lord Tenebrous
05-31-2002, 10:44 PM
Your propoganda would only give them the attention they already seek.

Remember that Simpsons with the rampaging advertizement figures? Just take Lisa's advice, and they'll soon go away...

Just don't look.
Just don't look.

05-31-2002, 10:48 PM
Scalpers will be here until the end of time. ain't no stopping them. I think this would be funny


Darth Narcis
06-01-2002, 12:44 AM
i believe that would be a great movie to make... research would need to be done into the background, the history of those who scalp. Were they abused as children? were they just nerds? or is there something even more sinister behind it all... You could shoot it like one of those 60's live-action episodes of batman, with the "oof" and "whack" captions when there are fights in the toy isle, and make a new language, which could be known as scalper code... e, t, c...

06-01-2002, 12:04 PM
LOL! That would be pretty darn sweet! Mockumentary sounds real good to me... How about starting it something like this (admittedly ripping of the Spider-Man trailers here :D ):


We focus on the city's SKYLINE for a moment. Then there is a PAN DOWN that slowly takes us into the STREETS. We begin to explore them ever so slowly.

VOICE (OS): Who I am? Do you really wanna know? I guess most people would call me your vanilla next-door guy. But they are wrong. I am what others don't have the gust to be. I am a man on a mission.

We move around one more CORNER and get to...


Multiple CUSTOMERS are lined up in front of the store with their CARTS.

VOICE (OS): I am a scalper!

DRAMATIC MUSIC blares as we see the store doors open. At this, A FAT, BALDING GUY throws away his giant piece of pizza and starts shoving any other CUSTOMERS aside. He rushes into the store, purposely knocking over BICYCLES, BUGGIES and BINS OF TOYS along the way. As other CUSTOMERS trip and fall in the background, he reaches the STAR WARS AISLE. He pulls entire PEGS OF FIGURES into his cart, then throws over a BIN OF FIGURS and starts shoveling these in as well.

CUT to a DAD, who is just handing his SON a FIGURE.


Grimacing horribly, the SCALPER catches the DAD with a football tackle. Both end up on the floor, where the SCALPER quickly seizes the FIGURE. As the SON makes a grab for it, he is knocked aside by the rising SCALPER. The SCALPER then raises the FIGURE high above his head, clutching it tightly with both hands.


Then you could just go from there.... Wadda ya say? :D

06-01-2002, 03:07 PM
It would be interesting, but it would have an extremely limited audience. And if anything, like all mockumentary's, the people who you are making fun of would love it more than anyone!!

I think it would have a broader appeal if you did a documentary/mock of toy collectors in general, and include the scalper thing in as a part of it. Because most people honestly don't differentiate us and scalpers. To most people, we are in the same group. I think you would be better off seperating the different types of collectors. Scalpers, loose collectors, completionists, carded collectors. That kind of thing. Devote a part of it to each type, an have them explain why their typ of collecting is better, or whatever.

Sidiously Darth
06-01-2002, 03:46 PM

Stop by the Orlando Collector's Club forum. We're a small group from all over FL. We may be able to shed a little light on the subject for you. We're always interested in hearing from others in the "Sunshine State".:)

06-01-2002, 05:39 PM
Yeah I might do that next time i'm in town. I live close to Haines City/Winter Haven right now. As for the guy who mentioned doing it on all the collectors. I had thought it over and just found it had to make it funny. But I do plan on putting some "real collectors" comments in if i go with a mockumentary about how he can't find the toys and scalpers buy them up. It will take a month or two to hatch up some good ideas but it will be really funny when done. Or i could throw a slight noir touch on it and have the scalper do a narrative. lol. I'll have to think for awhile my man objective is to show the extremes of how scalpers aquire stuff, that they are no life losers, and making it funny all at once. I'll think stuff through. I love the spider man rip off. very funny. NOW WAS THERE scalpers back when the original toys come out? When did the form of scalping begin to take place? With the creation of ebay? or what. Anyone know a history? Anything at all can help me. LMK


06-01-2002, 08:18 PM
Scalpers are a rare breed in Tallahassee. You can find just about everything as soon as it comes out. Raleigh NC is a different story. It sucks.

06-01-2002, 08:21 PM
But I can say that the world of toy scalping, collecting, and hording was already sent up rather nicely in Toy Story 2. Wayne Knight dressed in a stupid Chicken suit- too funny.

06-02-2002, 12:44 AM
If anything, I say make a documentary/mock that would show each version of collector/scalper in its true form. Not really mocking scalpers, but showing them for who they really are. Sure the wacky spiderman-like intro mentioned above would be funny, but of course its not true. I say do it kinda like Cops is done. Like an interview of a collector going from store to store looking for figures to finish off the collection. And an interview with the scalper going from store to store and getting just what he needs. You could have the collector unknowingly following the scalper from store to store until when the collector arrives to see the scalper hoarding some figures.

Something like that. I just think a real-life type of Cops-style show would be cool.

06-02-2002, 01:21 AM
Hi, i'm Quinn Chovanec

Here is one for you

Scalper is waiting at TRU doors at 9:20 or so...
Guy behind him is talking to a friend about the new figures of star wars that are comign out soon.

Friend "Jim, did you hear about the new hasbro Lightsabers?"
Jim " Yeah, I only want the Count Dooku one"
Friend " Yeah, I think it'd be cool if they had a Darth Sideous
Jim " Yeah, but I just can't see Chancellor Palpatine with one.."
Friend " What are you talkign about?"
Jim "Darth Sideous is Chancellor Palpatine, Dan..."
Friend " You gotta be ****tin me"
---By this time the scalper is very irritated and spins around"
Scalper " Oh my god, you have got to be the Dumbest Star Wars
Fan Ever! Why do you even bother collecting!"
-The two men are taken back
The doors open and the scalper scammers into the store
He runs to the star wars aisle causing much chaos on the way there ( steals someones coffe o nthe way)

When he arrives there is nothing but old old figures

He is stunend and starts swearing.

The other two men catch up and say top the scalper,
Well won't be getting anything today will you

The scalper gives them the finger and runs off

He spots a TRU employee entering the bathroom and runs into the abthroom.

He pushes the employee to the wall and says,

"I need you're clothes and the employee scared as hell gives him his shirt and vest.

The scalper chanegs runs out and ehads into a stockroom.

Another employee sees him and says

" Hey are you the new guy? You were supposed to be here an horu early to stock!"

The scalper punches the other mans lights out when approach, he runs abotu until he fins the hasbro boxes, he rips one open to find the Icing on the cake,

He grabs 2 more cases and ehads to the register

What do you think besides typos?

06-03-2002, 04:51 PM
Stores should put a limit on an individual buying a certain amount on any new figs, Stop em dead in their tracks.

06-04-2002, 08:08 AM

I don't know for sure, but I don't think WM or TRU is going to let you film in thier store. I used to work in a retail store and once there were these tourests from Japan in the store. They were just takeing photos of thier trip and wanted to see an American Store. Well the manager had to ask them to stop taking photos or leave. I imagin this had something to do with the way the store was set up and they didn't want another company to have a photo of thier stuff.

Like I said I have no clue, but I'd check it out at the stores first befor you do any further planning.