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  1. #1

    Zoolander: 90 minutes of my life I can never have back

    I suffered through the abomination known as Zoolander today; do yourself a favor - AVOID this movie at all costs! Not only what is just not funny, the whole assassination plot against the President of Malaysia was not tactful and rather inappropriate.
    Last edited by AmanaMatt; 09-29-2001 at 03:33 AM.

  2. #2
    Thanks for the warning. So far, I haven't seen one Ben Stiller vehicle that's been worth a hill of legumes, this one looked no different but it had more positive buzz... luckily, I saved my $8.50 and saw this warning.
    Darth Vader is becoming the Mickey Mouse of Star Wars.

    "We named the dog 'Chewbacca'!"
    The use of a lightsaber does not make one a Jedi, it is the ability to not use it.

  3. #3
    I don't understand how a movie based on an last minute vh1 2 min comedy skit can't work as a full length motion picture!!! Will somebody PLease explaine!!!
    Your signature here!

  4. #4

    Thumbs down

    SNL has the patent on that idea, THE Slayer. Submitted:

    Stuart Saves His Family
    Superstar
    Night at the Roxbury
    It's Pat
    Coneheads
    Ladies Man
    Wayne's World 1 & 2 (these weren't too bad)
    They failed with a "Sprockets" movie when Mike Myers quit
    I think "Water Boy" was Cajun Man in pads and helmet
    "May the 4th be with you?" "Why yes, thank you for asking."

  5. #5
    I had a feeling this one would be just as bad if not worse than Mystery Men. Whoo, what a stinker that one was.
    Postatem obscuri lateris nescitis

  6. #6
    Originally posted by Amanamatt
    I suffered through the abomination known as Zoolander today
    Can I ask whats it about,whos in it etc? or is the assassination plot what this movie is about?
    GNT
    ''
    You fool, my reach is far greater than the Jedi.Only a Sith can wield the force over such a great distance.'' - Darth Sidious

  7. #7
    Registered Eternal Padawan's Avatar
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    The most disturbing image in this film is the (obviously) digitally altered NYC skyline where they have (obviously) removed the WTC from the footage. Who are they kidding? They kept a fleeting shot of the WTC in Michael Douglas' Don't say a Word and the audience cheered when they saw it. I suggest everybody skip Zoolander and see this one instead...
    Who's a sexy kitty? Who is? Yes, you are. You're a SEXY kitty...

    PHONE BOOK Written by Bendis. Art by Jim Lee. Total copies sold: 15 billion.

    "Comic Collecting. Miss a decade, miss a lot."

  8. #8
    90 minutes??? Is that how long the movie is? X-Men was around 90 minutes too, and it really could've used an extra half-hour!

    Why are movies getting shorter while the ticket prices are still going up?

  9. #9
    PLOT SPOILER WARNING:
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    Zoolander's plot is simple: There are a couple of big fashion manufatures' whose clothing lines are made in Malaysia and the current President of the aforementioned county is craking down on child labor; well, the bad guys/fashion manufactures' don't like that as they have a vested interest in keeping the labor there cheap...so they track down the stupidest human being on the planet, male model Derek Zoolander, and brainwash him into becoming an assassin when a certain song (can't remember which) is played.

    I laughed twice; overall, a very, very bad movie! To be fair to Ben Stiller, I really love 'There's Something About Mary' and 'Meet the Parents.'

    If you guys want a really great (IMO) movie that's a little on the off-color humor side, rent 'The Big Labouski' - a movie that truly doesn't suck.
    Last edited by AmanaMatt; 09-30-2001 at 03:28 AM.

  10. #10
    Registered Eternal Padawan's Avatar
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    And Amanamatt had to relive the horrible memory in order to write that synopsis for you guys, so thank him.

    Amanamatt, I'm sorry you had to dredge up awful images in order to successfully recreate a shortened version of the film for us. Thank you for making that sacrifice...

    The song was "Relax" by Frankie Goes To Hollywood See? FUNNY STUFF! (Not really)

    The Big Lebowski IS a funny movie. My favorite Coen Bros film.
    Who's a sexy kitty? Who is? Yes, you are. You're a SEXY kitty...

    PHONE BOOK Written by Bendis. Art by Jim Lee. Total copies sold: 15 billion.

    "Comic Collecting. Miss a decade, miss a lot."

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