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  1. #1

    American Pie III

    Eugene Levy, Jason Biggs, Alysson Hannigan, and someone else have signed on for American Pie 3. Normally this would not warrant a thread, but I have to pose the question:


    Here's what I imagine the people who signed on had to say:

    Levy: "I was huge once. Well, I coulda been. I was on SCTV! But Moranis and Candy, they took the glory! This is my one big hit, and, brother, I'm milking it for all it's worth!"

    Biggs: "I'm so typecast, I'll never have a career. Might as well get money for bus fare."

    Hannigan: "Wooooooo, pretty caterpillar! I ate a cheese doodle once, and it said to me, 'Alysson, baby, you need to focus on the hypotenuse.' I didn't know what that meant, so I hailed a cab and mooned the driver."

    Other Guy: "Hey, you don't even remember who I am, so I don't have to talk to you, jerk."

    But in all seriousness, WHY?
    That's my jacket!

  2. #2
    I think I am going to vomit until I throw up!

  3. #3
    Holy crap! Why indeed?

    I would rather watch the Battlefield Earth sequel than another one of these movies.
    Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split. - Robert E. Howard

  4. #4
    Geez, I think I will go soak my head in the toilet. I think I could come up with a better idea for a sequel in there, then another American Pie movie. I think I'm going to be ill. I'm sick of all these dumb teen movies. Atleast the movies that were made for teens in the 70's, 80's, and early 90's had some redeeming qualities.

    MTFBWY and HH!!

    Jar Jar Binks

    AGENTS OF ATLAS - Returns in Early 2009.

  5. #5
    What! Nobody liked American Pies one and two; I was hoping for three, four five etc. With a lot more pie to go along with the movie.

  6. #6
    Vortex's Avatar
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    Feb 2002
    Location, location, its all about location
    I heard that too last night or a few nights ago on the news. And I too ask myself why. The second one was so thin in the story and I think I only laughed once when the kid was walking on the porch roof with his hand down his pants and the tape stuck to his hand.

    We had our 80's movies that were totally mental which turned out sequal after sequal or movies with the same story line...meatballs, any movie with John Cusack, naked guns, 3 men and a baby, all those horror movies like house, poltergeist, freddy, jason. And now most of these are the "cult" films. Utterly stupid but still loved and watched.

    American Pie is going to be the next generation cult movie, just like austin powers, harry potter, and l.o.t.r.

    Speaking of Austin...the two times I went to the movie I was amazed to see so many little kids (12-15) who there by themselves. I had 2 sitting in front of me, who's heads barely cleared the head rest and I don't think they laughed once. I think they were just there cause it was a "cool" thing to do. Didn't get the jokes, didn't see all the old bond refernces, get the jokes, but went cause it was the cool thing to do. Makes you wonder how that generation is gonna turn out.

  7. #7
    *Shakes head and slowly backs out of the room*

    Oh, End. Please END!
    They call them fingers, and yet they don't fing. Noodle that one for a while.
    "Logic dictates we haul @$$." - Mego Spock from Twisted Toyfare Theater; Issue #59
    "I'm a rage-aholic! I just can't live without rage-ahol!"

  8. #8
    Well, I loved American Pie.

    And I was all set for American Pie 2 to suck. But it didn't. I thought it was almost as good as the original. Now the idea of ANOTHER sequel is pushing it I think, but who knows, it may end up OK. And I can already tell it will be better than Blue Crush
    "Roger Nasty Butler!"

  9. #9
    Meh, I'll watch it and probably have several laughs.
    Shame on you B for the extreme Battlefield Earth comparison.

    Eugene Levy's allegedly involved in the new Christopher Guest project, so he'll redeem himself there.

    Hey Chux, are you sure this movie deserves the roman numerals you used in the thread title?

  10. #10
    Sky Movies Active (a British interactive movie news thing) had an exclusive article about American Pie III. It said Hugh Grant was going to be in it as Jim's mum and dad's sex councilor as they are trying to spice up their sex life. Also one of the lads will be getting married, but up to now none of the original girls from Pie 1 and 2 have signed up for 3.

    I will probably go and see it and will judge then if wanted a 3rd or not. I'm not sure what other funny stuff they could have, you've got sex with a pie and superglue on a !! Anyway...

    "You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you!" - Obi-Wan Kenobi
    "There's a gentleness about a total Star Wars geek that is sublime."- Rick McCallum
    My DVD Collection


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