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  1. #1

    Post Lines That WILL Be Cut From the Movie (SW:E3)

    Since it's been so successful in the other areas (at least according to me ), how's abouts a similar thread for the as-yet-unknown Episode III? Okay? Okay! (p.s. Remember that this is a Spoiler-free zone, too)

    ON PLANET X
    Anakin (talking to Padme's pregnant stomach): "Luke, I am your father. Yes I am! Daddy, daddy, daddy!"

    ON PLANET XY, OVER MOLTEN LAVA PIT
    Anakin: "Remember when you said I would be the death of you someday?"
    Kenobi: "Yes."
    Anakin: "What exactly did you mean by that?"
    Kenobi: "Well, Anakin. You see, you have always been impulsive and quick to anger, so I just thought-"
    (Anakin pushes Obi-Wan into pit)
    Anakin: "Gotcha! Master...? Oops, this is not good."

    ON CORUSCANT
    Palpatine: "Honored Jedi Council Members, I have some important news for you all. I am... wait, wasn't there some little green guy?"
    Mace: "Nope."
    Palpatine: "You sure? I thought I remembered one, maybe even a second one."
    Ki-Adi: "You are mistaken. No little green guys here, ever."
    Palpatine: "I guess you're right. Meet my new best friend."
    (Man in dark armor steps forward) "Moo wah haha haha!"
    CU Later. Contracted Universe? Later. :(

  2. #2

    Re: Lines That WILL Be Cut From the Movie (SW:E3)

    Originally posted by Bel-Cam Jos
    Since it's been so successful in the other areas (at least according to me ), how's abouts a similar thread for the as-yet-unknown Episode III? Okay? Okay! (p.s. Remember that this is a Spoiler-free zone, too)

    ON PLANET X
    Anakin (talking to Padme's pregnant stomach): "Luke, I am your father. Yes I am! Daddy, daddy, daddy!"

    Anakin (to Padme's big tummy): Who's your daddy?

    Padme (eye's closed in ectasy): Ohhhh, you baby, you!

    Anakin (annoyed): I was talking to your stomach!

  3. #3
    Dooku - Anakin, I am your father.

    Anakin - George has already used that one.

    Dooku - Sorry. How about "I am your sister!"

    Anakin - Done too!

    Dooku - DAMN! Ok, how about this one, "Anakin, I am no relation to you what so ever!"

    PENDO!
    "You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you!" - Obi-Wan Kenobi
    "There's a gentleness about a total Star Wars geek that is sublime."- Rick McCallum
    My DVD Collection

  4. #4
    Palpatine reveals he is a clone:

    Mace: "Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, how are you doing today."

    Palpatine: "I am not Chancellor Palpatine, I am Darth Sidious! The clone of Chancellor Palpatine, and Supreme Dark Lord of the Sith."

    Mace: "You're a Sith clown."

    Palpatine: "No, clone, I said I am a clone of Palpatine, and a Dark Lord of the Sith."

    Mace: "Oh, you're a clone!"

    Palpatine: "Yes, I murdered Palpatine years ago, before Episode I!"

    Mace: "I see."

    Palpatine: "That is why I have been aging soo quickly. By the time Episode V rolls around I will probably look like a monkey."

    Mace: "Hey, what's with the freaky eye's? You got jaundice or something?"
    May the force be with you.

  5. #5
    A conversation in the hospital after Palpatine pulls Anakin out of the lava...

    Palpatine: You had a close call my young apprentice.

    Anakin: Yeah, tell me about it. I did realize I need to do a few things, like contact my brother Owen and tell him how much I miss him.

    Palpatine: Well, is there anything else I can do for you?

    Anakin: You know, I always wanted to sound like Barry White. I don't suppose you can help me out with that.

    Palpatine: I'll see what I can do.

    Flash Foward to Return of the Jedi, just before Vader chucks Palpatine into the shaft:

    Palpatine: What are you doing? I saved you, what wrong did I ever do to you?

    Vader: I said Barry White, not James Earl Jones!
    Yo momma. That's right, I said "yo momma".

  6. #6
    ON CORUSCANT, JEDI TEMPLE
    Yoda: "Ready the Council is, to put you to the Trials."
    Anakin: "Thank you, Master."
    Mace: "Anakin, if one speeder is travelling east at 100 kph and another going north at 80 kph, how long would it take the second speeder to reach the first, travelling at a 45-degree angle?"
    Anakin: "Uh, twelve hours?"
    Mace: "Wrong! You fail the Trials!"
    Anakin: "Grr! I'll kill you all!"
    Yoda: "Whatever. To the hand, talk to."

    ON TATOOINE
    Jabba: "Where's my talk droid?"
    Droid: "Here, my lord."
    Jabba: "I want you to hit me as hard as you can."
    Droid: "Pardon me, sire?"
    Jabba: "You heard me. I want you to hit me as hard as you can."
    Droid: "Okay." (Barely taps him)
    Jabba: "No! I am angry with you, you terrible interpreter! EV-9D9, disintegrate him!"
    EV-9D9: "Oh yeah!"
    CU Later. Contracted Universe? Later. :(

  7. #7
    YODA: Anakin, never told you Shmi what to your father happened!
    ANAKIN: She told me enough! Something about not being able to explain it, yadda yadda.
    YODA: No. Your father am I.
    ANAKIN: Noooooooooooooo!!!

    MACE: Married? This is bad.
    PADME: Why's that?
    YODA: Against the code it is. Marriage leads to--
    ANAKIN: Oh, shove it in your pointy ear! It's not always been that way. I've read the old comics, about the Sunriders and such. And how do you explain Ki-Adi and Kieran? They're both married. It's not fair!
    YODA: When last a Jedi was divorced, lost everything we did. A thousand millennia it took us to earn what we have.
    PADME: I've never heard of a Jedi divorce!
    KI-ADI: That's because we changed the story.
    MACE: You see, we couldn't let it get out that our greatest enemies were all descended from Yoda's vindictive ex-wife, Sithy.

    YODA: Find Anakin we must. Enlisted the galaxy's greatest spy I have. Hello you will say to Sly Wiley!
    Tommy, close your eyes.

  8. #8

    Smile

    Originally posted by El Chuxter
    YODA: Find Anakin we must. Enlisted the galaxy's greatest spy I have. Hello you will say to Sly Wiley!
    I am grinning a sly grin, Chuxter!

    ON TATOOINE
    Anakin: "Chep oblo a weelo, Watto." (I'm here to find my step-brother, Watto)
    Watto (wearing an eye-patch and a goatee, with a mynock on his shoulder): "Annie? Little orphan Annie? It is you! You're a Sith now. Say! How's about you help me with some deadbeats that owe me a lot of money?"
    Anakin: "I'm here to find Owen Lars."
    Watto: "Lars? Uh, I don't sell to him anymore. In fact, I hear he married that Beru, over past Mos Eisely, I think."
    Anakin: "I feel like we've done this before..."
    Watto: "Oh, no. See the goatee? It's not a scruffy beard like my Episode II figure; now Hasbro can make a new figure of me!"
    Anakin: "Why do I have the desire to wear a white moisture farmer outfit right now?"
    Watto: "Arr!"

    ON NABOO
    Padme: "Anakin, I have some important news about us."
    Anakin: "Sure, yeah. Whatever." (Practices lightsaber moves)
    Padme: "I'm... I mean we... I... I'm going to have a child."
    Anakin: "Yeah, those Corellians are pretty wild." (Continues lightsaber moves)
    Padme: "Do you ever listen to me anymore?"
    Anakin: "No, I've never been to Yavin Four. Why?" (Move saber practicing)
    Padme: "Oh, nothing..."

    ON PLANET G
    Count Dooku: "So. We meet again."
    Anakiin: "No, I'm an Expanded Universe Clone of Anakin. See the extra vowel in my name? We've never met before."
    Count Dooku: "My bad."
    Anakiin: "No prob."
    CU Later. Contracted Universe? Later. :(

  9. #9
    Missing Musical Scene: The Duet of Yoda and Kermit the Frog sitting on a log in the Dagobah swamp singing "It's not easy being green."
    Yo momma. That's right, I said "yo momma".

  10. #10
    Count Dooku:

    "You're a Wizard, Anakin.
    Line?
    wait, I mean,
    Frodo, use the Force!
    no, what I meant to say,
    was,
    You must destroy the One Ring, Harry Potter.
    Ok wait,
    Which one is this again?"

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