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  1. #11
    TOP TEN LIST
    of Things That Annoy Left-Handers:

    10. Right-handed scissors.
    9. Teachers who give lower grades to kids who use the "wrong hand".
    8. Learning to drive and wondering why they built all the roads backwards.
    7. People always asking "Why can't you use your right hand?" Just reply, "Why can't you use your left hand?"
    6. The thought that if you'd been born a few centuries earlier, you'd have been burned at the stake for witchcraft.
    5. Sitting at a desk three inches to the right of a right-hander and trying to write.
    4. The reaction you get from the salesperson when you ask if they sell left-handed potato peelers.
    3. The fact that "left", literally translated, means "wrong".
    2. Early childhood memory of your parents screaming in horror, "Oh no, my child is LEFT HANDED!"
    1. Ergonomic mouse - designed to fit comfortably in the right hand.

  2. #12
    the master jedi
    Guest
    TOP TEN LIST of my favorite practical jokes:

    10. Put some bananas in the toilet. Blindfold somebody and tell them to reach inside.

    9. Blindfold somebody. Tell them you are going to light them on fire. light a match and let them smell the smoke. Then whip out a piece of ice and touch to their skin. They'll really be freaked out by this one.

    8. Push a guy into a ladies public bathroom that's full of women.

    7. Make it look like you destroied your best friends Star Wars collection.

    6. if you see a person pretending like he's smoking ask him if he really wants to look like he's smoking. If he says yes tell him to get some pencil shteddings from a pencil sharpener, roll 'em up in a peice of paper, wet it down,and act like he's smokin'. Lead will get all over his face.

    5. When you're in a restaurant and the person you're with gets up to use the bathroom put a clean band-aid on their food. When they come back and find it on their food they'll freak out and you might get a free meal too.

    4. Stare at a person in a restaurant and see if they come over to you to tell you to stop it.

    3. Wedgie.

    2. Pulling down somebodys pants in public.

    1. If you have a pool tell a friend you put thie chemican in that turns red if you go to the bathroom in the pool. When you all get in the pool slip a packet of red Kool-Aid in your friends pocket.

  3. #13

    wha.....?

    Can sombody fill me in here. Whos the real Rollo Tommassi from the old board. So far I've seen "Rollo" "Rollo Tomasi" and "Rollo Tomassi" and I speculate the "Eternal Padawan" is the old Rollo to. ?!?
    and then she said "Do ya love me?" and I said "NO! but thats a pretty nice ski mask!"

  4. #14
    Eternal Padawan you stole my idea (Since It was deleted????)

    10. Sirsteve
    9. Jeditricks
    8. Everyone not mentioned in the list
    7. GNT
    6. GNT
    5. Rollo
    4.GNT
    3. Chuxter
    2. Bel Cam Jos
    1. GNT

    Sorry if I forgot someone(?)
    GNT
    ''
    You fool, my reach is far greater than the Jedi.Only a Sith can wield the force over such a great distance.'' - Darth Sidious

  5. #15
    Registered Eternal Padawan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Outside SSG, banging on the window furiously, yelling "LET ME IN!"
    Posts
    2,368

    Would the REAL Rollo please stand up...

    Okay Collector heres how it works.

    When the new forums started and everybody was signing up with their old names SOMEBODY (read: Utinni) signed up as Rollo Tomassi. When the REAL Rollo Tomassi tried to sign up, he couldn't and had to sign up as plain old "Rollo" to spread the word that this new Rollo Tomassi (read: Utinni or Episode1Sucks) was a fraud and an impostor. The REAL Rollo Tomassi contacted SirSteve and got his rightful name back, thereby deleting "Rollo" and replacing it with Rollo Tomassi. Meanwhile, the fraud (read: Utinni) having lost access to the Name Rollo Tomassi, signed up as Rollo Tomasi with one "S" and started posting again. Well. SirSteve was too clever and realized what he was doing and shut THAT name down also. So then the impostor (read: Utinni) signed up under his old identity. So "Rollo" and "Rollo Tomasi" are no longer active Usernames and cannot be contacted and/or Logged on. The only mystery remaining is who Utinni USED to be, because he WAS someone else before he was Utinni (and still may be, posting under two names)


    I am and have always been Eternal Padawan
    Who's a sexy kitty? Who is? Yes, you are. You're a SEXY kitty...

    PHONE BOOK Written by Bendis. Art by Jim Lee. Total copies sold: 15 billion.

    "Comic Collecting. Miss a decade, miss a lot."

  6. #16
    _____________________

    Utinni: I am not Jimmy Hoffa.

    Utinni: Neither is Jimmy Hoffa me. Although we sound a lot alike. Furthermore, I am not notafinga. I/he might be his/my clone, but we/we aren't each other (I think). Also, I am not DarthMaulgot Mailed1 because it would be too difficult to type that in every time and I am lazy. And I am neither jargo nor Grand Moff Jargo. Who does that leave? I am none other than.....

    Utinni: That would be spoiling the secret.

    _____________________

    These quotes were found locked in a hidden vault (wink, wink). I think they answer our "who's Utinni?" questions quite nicely. Especially the "I am not DarthMaulgot Mailed1" one. Was he sent Priority Mail? And I sure hope he had insurance.
    "May the 4th be with you?" "Why yes, thank you for asking."

  7. #17

    S: The Final Insult

    TOP TEN LETTER* BANNED BY **G

    10. *
    9. *
    8. *
    7. *
    6. *
    5. *
    4. *
    3. *
    2. *
    1. *


    "Good night Mo* E*pa. You're the greate*t."

  8. #18
    Top Ten Forum Created Characters
    (Fill in your own numbers)

    Darth Santa and his Happy TIE Fighter of Love
    Darryl the Biker Scout
    Guido, Tito, and Laredo
    GrrrBite
    Disco Tusken
    Speedo
    The Party AT-AT
    the hybrid Tauntaun-Wampa-Gungan-Whatever creature
    Sio Bibble (okay, not exactly, but he should be!)
    Sly Wiley
    Tommy, close your eyes.

  9. #19
    Top 10 Star Wars you do NOT want to tell your girlfriend:

    10. "When nine-hundred years old, look as good you will not."
    9. "This baby's got a few surprises left in her, sweetheart."
    8. "She's the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy."
    7. "You hear me baby? Hold togeather."
    6. "I take orders from just one person: me."
    5. "Why you stuck up half witted, scruffy looking, nerf herder."
    4. "I recognized your foul stench when I was brought on board."
    3. "Freeze you Rebel scum."
    2. "Your tauntaun'll freeze before you reach the first marker."
    1. "I think you just can't let a gorgeous guy like me out of your sight."

  10. #20
    TOP TEN JERRY SEINFELD JOKES - REDUX

    10)What's up with airline peanuts?
    9)What's up with that red spot on Gorbachev's head?
    8)What's up with suspenders?
    7)What's up with ketchup? Is it catsup or ketchup?
    6)What's up with stuff?
    5)What's up with they way they package hot dogs and hot dog buns?
    4)What's up with that crud that sticks to your teeth after eating popcorn?
    3)What's up with bowling?
    2)What's up with that worm in tequila?

    And the number one joke...

    1)What's up with Oprah. She's fat, she's thin, she's fat, she's thin. Pick a body style and go with it.

    Thank you SSG! You've been great! Good night!
    Last edited by Mandalorian Candidat; 08-22-2001 at 09:50 AM.
    "I'm just a YES man trying to make my way in the universe." - Jango McCallum

    "Good dialogue and smooth editing are no match for a good YES man by your side, kid." - George Lucas

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