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  1. #21
    #1 at the box office, and the biggest international opening of 2013. Granted, that won't stand for long, but it should be enough to get a sequel.

    Yo Joe!
    Tommy, close your eyes.

  2. #22
    Quote Originally Posted by El Chuxter View Post
    #1 at the box office, and the biggest international opening of 2013. Granted, that won't stand for long, but it should be enough to get a sequel.

    Yo Joe!
    Way to go, Brenda!

  3. #23
    Quote Originally Posted by El Chuxter View Post
    Edit: I take that partly back. They had to leave out Baroness. The way that first POS ended, there wasn't really much of a way to bring her back as a Cobra. Plus, it looks like they want to distance themselves from it as much as possible, leaving only the four "huge" guys (CC, SE, SS, and Duke) in it, as well as Zartan, because he's integral to what the plan obviously is (at least at first).
    Could have retconned the ROC Baroness into being a brainwashed decoy for the real one. They miscast the ROC character horrendously and then also wrote her just as poorly, so why not use the cheap-out to evade failure?

    Quote Originally Posted by Maradona View Post
    I was dressed as Old Snake, from the Transformers episode "Only Human."


    Actually, I wore an old black hooded sweatshirt with a red Cobra insignia. I was hoping to here it yelled, but alas it was not. When I got home, I felt compelled to watch the episode just for the ending scene where he says "They simply don't make terrorists like they used to..."
    Dang, now one of you guys has to dress as Old Snake for Halloween!

    I also was hoping to HEAR it yelled () and nearly yelled it when Firefly's motorcycle blasted into the prison entrance.


    Quote Originally Posted by El Chuxter View Post
    Okay, color me impressed that, after five absolutely wretched attempts, Hasbro finally has an action movie to their credit that doesn't suck. Heck, it's actually pretty good!

    The ninja battle was, holy crap, I just need to sit down. Getting light-headed just thinking about how awesome it was.

    A bit surprising, but I'm glad there were practically no Easter eggs. With this clearly being a house-cleaning to set up a third, proper Joe movie, anyone who was name-dropped early on would be toast. (I saw the names Grunt and Clutch in the credits, but didn't actually hear them spoken.) I was a bit surprised to see Zartan and Destro offed. Clearly, the house is being cleaned thoroughly.
    Glad to hear you liked it.

    I don't think we can say for sure that Destro was offed, they were way underground and under water and he was in a life support pod far from the explosion. Another franchise, yeah he'd be dead, but here I think that's survivable.

    Firefly, damn, when he first walked into the prison in his balaclava, I thought I was going to pee myself. That WAS Firefly. I don't care how they changed details about the character. That was the crazy mofo who might just be the single most dangerous Cobra operative.
    Yeah, Firefly's entrance was good. Then he got itchy scalp syndrome and couldn't help constantly unmasking.

    In short, definitely worth seeing. I wouldn't mind seeing it again. Not perfect, but quite enjoyable.
    Overselling it, or do you still feel that way?

    Storm Shadow, once his face was shown, was seen unmasked quite a bit in the comic. Firefly remained a mystery but was finally unmasked exactly once. For the sake of realism (movie realism, at least), I didn't mind him not wearing a mask when not in the field.
    Too bad all his unmasked scenes were in the field and during action.

    In. Deed. And you could spot the geeks in the audience at my theater--we were the ones who cheered or said "YES!" or something to that effect when the Cobra technician called them by the "High-Speed Sentry" designation.
    The only ones in our theater who did that were sitting to the left of Maradona and to my right.

    In. Deed. Again. Firefly also tried to escape on the old Night Landing (explaining why it's getting an update in the Retaliation toyline).
    Yeah, I noticed the night landing as well but it's not a specialized vehicle so I wasn't as excited by it, good inclusion but it's an off-the-shelf thing. AND THEN A WATER MOCCASIN DROVE THROUGH IT!

    Yes, and an actual reason for the switch, rather than glossing over it. That was a nice, unexpected touch.
    ROC was a real carbuncle on the franchise, there shouldn't be so much excitement over a fix like that but it definitely felt right.

    He was much less just a ninja in a snow suit this time, huh?
    Yeah, everything about the way ROC handled SS was a disappointment and here it held up, he was more interesting and nuanced and goal-oriented like the original.

    Agreed. The implication of him as the Hard Master's killer was a tad forced, but I appreciate the nod to the comic and Resolute.
    A tad forced? Oh, most definitely, but how much more time could we have spent with that storyline to fill it out in a 2-hour movie?

    The gimmick didn't bother me much. It felt like something that could've been in the cartoon, and it explained why a Cobra operative would have a name like "Firefly" (since he's not an independent operative here).
    I don't get the "firefly" reference as an independent operator here, I thought he was firefly because he was stealthy and blew stuff up. The little fireflies weren't credible for me, they were too small to be effective bombs IMO, they didn't tie in well enough visually for my tastes.

    True, but Mouse is also a Sigma Six character. (Granted, using an S6 character was probably so they didn't waste an actual ARAH character as cannon fodder.) Also, they probably figured the solid red would be confused with the Red Ninjas, and the black (from the Devil's Due comic) would've been confused with Snake Eyes.
    Yeah, but nobody liked Mouse in S6 either . You are probably right about the colors, just odd to have S6 in here, her red ninja outfit with a blindfold instead of a ninja mask also wouldn't have sold enough.

    He looked more commando than ninja to me. I didn't mind it.
    Commandos are a little leaner in their armor, I think, because they work in tighter formation and move faster. Snake Eye's shoulderpads and helmet were a lot of bulk IMO.

    I'm quite surprised they left him dead, since he was likable. Kinda waiting for the inevitable YouTube mashup with that last scene of the Joes (minus Jaye and Colton) with Doc's voice over from the original movie.
    I really expected him to pull a movie voiceover like that, if not a full recovery and show up at the end. Kinda glad they left him dead, he didn't work as the character.

    Compared to the first (aside from Zartan, Cobra Commander, and Destro), this was Academy Award caliber work here.
    As much as I love Christopher Eccleston, his turn as Destro in ROC was badly directed, -written, and -acted.

    But if it bombs too badly, there'd be no finale.
    I think they could have leaned out some stuff like the ninja material (not cut, just made it leaner) and the beginning and the 'hood stuff, trimmed the infiltration of the president's gala entirely, and still have a full enough movie. So what I mean is tell the same story, just show less of it rather than leave parts for another movie.

    He's Bruce Willis! How can you complain? Way better than Denis Quaid (who I was a bit miffed to not see addressed--shouldn't Roadblock go to him first, since I doubt he was serving in the field under Duke).
    How can I complain? He absorbed a lot of the film's budget and needed to be a better character since he ties the whole thing together, instead he sucked life out of the screen. I would have been way happier with Dennis Quaid playing this character (his turn as Hawk was pretty bad in ROC but... ROC is ROC) or almost anybody else. The fact that only SE and Jinx answered the call bugged me too.

    Again, do you really want Baroness, if it means she's a blonde moron who's Duke's girlfriend?
    That character was never The Baroness in my mind, she wasn't European, she wasn't black-haired, she wore fake boobs and had to wear sunglasses to hide the fact that she would flinch every time she fired a weapon. In short, she was never the Baroness to begin with, so not a problem.

    Kinda bugged me, too (and I REALLY wanted one of them to be Sergeant Slaughter; that would've been way too cool). I'm wondering now if two of them were Clutch and Grunt?

    Also, did my eyes deceive me, or, during the "story thus far" bit at the beginning, did I catch a glimpse of an old-school Cobra Trooper?
    I wanted Sgt Slaughter to show up in the ring at the rec center, would have been perfect. Rumor has it that he won't do these movies without a bigger part though.

    I didn't remember seeing an old school cobra trooper there but could be.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tycho View Post
    I supposed that Brenda was General Joe Colton's daughter. Was I correct? That made a compelling human story to this that I took in while I was watching the film
    No mention of Colton having a daughter, much less one named "Brenda", that I can remember. And why would Colton call some other girl by his own daughter's name? That'd be weird. Lady Jaye was definitely not "Brenda".

    Quote Originally Posted by El Chuxter View Post
    #1 at the box office, and the biggest international opening of 2013. Granted, that won't stand for long, but it should be enough to get a sequel.

    Yo Joe!
    YO JOE! Apparently Paramount has pulled the trigger on another sequel, mainly I think due to how much mojo this is having overseas. Hopefully they get Chu back and give him better producers and more help with writing the screenplay - either time or budget or direct Joe lineage writers.

    Quote Originally Posted by Maradona View Post
    Way to go, Brenda!
    Hey hey Brenda!!! That's a thing they say occasionally at the end of The Late Show with David Letterman, and Bruce Willis is a friend of the show I think, maybe he just thought it was funny to use that and ran with it.
    Darth Vader is becoming the Mickey Mouse of Star Wars.

    "We named the dog 'Chewbacca'!"
    The use of a lightsaber does not make one a Jedi, it is the ability to not use it.

  4. #24
    Quote Originally Posted by JediTricks View Post
    I don't get the "firefly" reference as an independent operator here, I thought he was firefly because he was stealthy and blew stuff up. The little fireflies weren't credible for me, they were too small to be effective bombs IMO, they didn't tie in well enough visually for my tastes.
    In the original, he was never officially Cobra. (Well, the cartoon never explained any of the mercs.) It fit that his name was unrelated to snakes. If he's a full-fledged, high-ranking Cobra, it seems a bit odd that he doesn't have a snake name without some other explanation (like the explosive fireflies).

    It just occurred to me that Bruce Willis is Joe Colton, and his ex-wife is Demi Moore... the title character in G.I.Jane. Which Disney had to buy the rights to or something to use as the title, since G.I.Jane is the nurse who eventually married Colton! Maybe that's why Jane didn't show up; she left him and moved in with Ashton Kutcher.
    Tommy, close your eyes.

  5. #25
    I just learned what I've seen Mouse in before. I guess it's forgivable that I didn't recognize him, given that he was a little kid in Jurassic Park.
    Tommy, close your eyes.

  6. #26
    Quote Originally Posted by El Chuxter View Post
    In the original, he was never officially Cobra. (Well, the cartoon never explained any of the mercs.) It fit that his name was unrelated to snakes. If he's a full-fledged, high-ranking Cobra, it seems a bit odd that he doesn't have a snake name without some other explanation (like the explosive fireflies).
    What about Major Bludd, what snake-related name is that? Or Mindbender? Or Baroness? Crimson Guard? None of them are snake-named and rank highly.

    I always took Cobra as basically like GI Joe in that they take guys wherever they can find them so the names come from diverse backgrounds.

    It just occurred to me that Bruce Willis is Joe Colton, and his ex-wife is Demi Moore... the title character in G.I.Jane. Which Disney had to buy the rights to or something to use as the title, since G.I.Jane is the nurse who eventually married Colton! Maybe that's why Jane didn't show up; she left him and moved in with Ashton Kutcher.
    Oh man, you are sick.

    Quote Originally Posted by El Chuxter View Post
    I just learned what I've seen Mouse in before. I guess it's forgivable that I didn't recognize him, given that he was a little kid in Jurassic Park.
    Really? He was on Justified at the beginning of the current season and didn't look that much like Mouse, I guess because the hair color changed.
    Darth Vader is becoming the Mickey Mouse of Star Wars.

    "We named the dog 'Chewbacca'!"
    The use of a lightsaber does not make one a Jedi, it is the ability to not use it.

  7. #27
    Major Bludd is even less an "official" Cobra than Firefly (and "Bludd" is his last name). The name "Baroness" is her actual title. Dr. Mindbender takes his name from a play on his specialty and real name (Dr. Brian Bender).
    Tommy, close your eyes.

  8. #28
    I don't think Duke has to be dead. I think COBRA could have used Tarzan's Micro probes to decorate a body up like Duke.

    Meanwhile they hold him prisoner and maybe offer a trade to get back Deborah.
    BAD Pts Need: R5-C7 lf leg (x2), , R4-P44 right leg BAD Pts Offered For Trade: PM me - I have lots of parts now including BG-J38!. New Kyle Katarn is also available.

  9. #29
    Tarzan's? Now that would be an awesome crossover.
    Tommy, close your eyes.

  10. #30
    Ugggh. Voice to text typo. I meant Zartan...and Destro.

    In movie 3 Baroness will be back and seem to have sympathy for Duke because he's being tortured by major blood.

    COBRA faked his death. She suggests to her brother that they trade Duke for destro.

    When they make the trade in the Arctic snow job discovers that they're up to something.

    COBRA will have a new plan to take over the world. Duh.
    BAD Pts Need: R5-C7 lf leg (x2), , R4-P44 right leg BAD Pts Offered For Trade: PM me - I have lots of parts now including BG-J38!. New Kyle Katarn is also available.

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